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Original poster

Lodger cranks up heating to 25

582 replies

Mumskisail · 05/01/2023 10:37

My partner left a few years ago and I had time off work for burnout and now in a less stressful (lower paid) role so on a tight income. I rent 2 rooms to help cover my mortgage and bills (about 40%).

The house is heated to 18-21 degrees depending on the room / personal preference, using Nest thermostats (called TRVs) on each radiator. It is lowered at 11pm until 5.30am, meaning it's warm for about an hour after going to bed and it heats up for a few hours before the lodgers get up.

One lodger is very happy with this and prefers a cooler room so sometimes turns it down.

But the other constantly overrides this and heats his room to 25. When I've tried to speak to him about it he answers his door in a tshirt and is only wearing normal socks. The rest of us have warm clothes, slippers and big fleece hoodies on winter evenings, and use fleece blankets to stay cosy on the sofa.

We seem to be in a battle of wills. He goes along with my suggested times and temperatures in discussion but has done everything including claiming his radiator and the TRV don't work, disconnecting the TRV but trying to make it look as though it's connected, saying it won't connect and pulling the little pin out with a pair of pliers to force the heating on. He leaves it on all night. The thermostat when it's reading says 25-26.

The other issue in this old Victorian house is that the heating pumping out all night causes banging in the pipes and keeps myself and the other lodger awake, or wakes us up in the night. So we prefer lots of layers and a quiet night unless we're in a cold patch.

I've offered him extra duvets and blankets (his looks thin) and a hot water bottle but he refuses. I've asked him to discuss the times he wants the heating on and to talk about the heating.

He says the temperature reading is wrong so I gave him a wireless thermostat which showed the same temperature as the TRV and showed it was correct.

I've explained about the increasing cost of gas and showed him my bills. I've showed him the temperatures in the rest of the house and that we are comfortable.

This is the second winter we are having these issues. Last year his sister died so I just kept my mouth shut and left him to it but I felt really unhappy.

Do I just suck it up, winter will be over soon and I'm not making a loss. Or do I tell him it's not acceptable and ask him to leave? Or is it better the devil you know, this is the only issue.

A friend suggested a locking cover to go over the TRV, I'm so irritated it's tempting but is that really ethical? And anyway would he then just get an electric heater? I don't go into his room and I would never snoop.

He's a 44 year old man having to rent a room and it must be his sanctuary and private space.

Do I just let him win the battle and chill out?

OP posts:
DixonD · 05/01/2023 22:48

You sound like a very reasonable landlady. Could you increase his rent to cover the extra cost? If he’s ok otherwise, this would be my next move if talking to him doesn’t work. Although it’s a pain for you, you’re right in what you say in that the room is his “home” and should be comfortable in it. If he refuses to pay extra to cover it, then it’s time for him to go. He’s got to pay his way if he wants extra heating.

MrsSkylerWhite · 05/01/2023 22:52

your experience sounds horrible, OooScotland.
we had to take in overseas sixth form students many years ago because we were, frankly, in dire straits. I wasn’t experienced, had two young children, a husband working away from home and tbh honest dreaded the arrival of the first.
she was wonderful. We went on to host 5 more.
if they had expected their rooms to be heated to 25 degrees, we would have fallen out with their paying families big time.

Original poster
Mumskisail · 05/01/2023 22:54

Wiluli · 05/01/2023 21:11

Sorry but unless you explained to them they had to wear winter clothes inside their room you are being teh unreasonable one . There is no way I would not wear anything but a t shirt in my home , I hate the feeling of layers let alone in my bedroom .

Maybe he should move in with you! You're obviously not phased by the cost of living crisis, sadly that doesn't go for all of us.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mumskisail · 05/01/2023 22:58

MrsSkylerWhite · 05/01/2023 22:30

HotChoxs

What is people's problem in this thread? It's none of your business what they want to wear or not”

Nonsense. It’s entirely the bill-paying landlord’s business.

Exactly. He can wear what he likes but he can't complain he's cold if he's wearing a T-shirt in the middle of winter, crank up the heating 24/7 in the middle of the cost of living crisis with global warming issues... or take apart and disconnect the TRV and pull the pin out of the radiator so it calls for heat 24/7 but lie and say he hasn't done it. It's rude and inconsiderate

OP posts:
TeaPlsBob · 05/01/2023 23:03

Your house, your rules, end of. Doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. YANBU in my view.

Rent goes up X amount or get a new lodger.

bellabasset · 05/01/2023 23:04

My heating was on for an hour this morning and 3 hours this evening. The thermostat is set to 19° and the temperature is 18.9° one and a half hours since the heating went off. It's very mild today though. I wear socks and a jumper at the very least in winter.

marblemad · 05/01/2023 23:11

FlowerArranger · 05/01/2023 10:47

Keep it simple...

Rule 1 for lodgers: They are essentially paying guests in your home.

If a lodger doesn't fit in or gets on your tits, ask them to leave.

Not true and regardless of the term lodger or tenant they still have the right to a consistently warm abode.

MrsSkylerWhite · 05/01/2023 23:21

Marblemad

Not true and regardless of the term lodger or tenant they still have the right to a consistently warm abode.“

Oh rubbish. in no way is 25 degrees warm. For most people in the UK it’s hot. Most of us are opening windows and commenting on the heat if it reaches that in summer. For a lodger to expect that in his room in January, just nuts.

MarieKlepto · 05/01/2023 23:54

I'd just get rid. If it were just a battle of wills over the temperature that suits him because he wants to swan about in a t-shirt in winter then I may suggest a different strategy. But the tampering (i.e. damaging your property) and deception, well, nah. He's burnt his bridges. He's your lodger. You are not a charity.

Mayameemamoe · 06/01/2023 00:29

Consider tightening your belt and downsizing, then you won’t need to have lodgers.

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 06/01/2023 00:33

Mayameemamoe · 06/01/2023 00:29

Consider tightening your belt and downsizing, then you won’t need to have lodgers.

😂

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 06/01/2023 00:35

MrsSkylerWhite · 05/01/2023 23:21

Marblemad

Not true and regardless of the term lodger or tenant they still have the right to a consistently warm abode.“

Oh rubbish. in no way is 25 degrees warm. For most people in the UK it’s hot. Most of us are opening windows and commenting on the heat if it reaches that in summer. For a lodger to expect that in his room in January, just nuts.

No way is 25 C warm? 😂 Dtop talking such utter crap.

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 06/01/2023 00:35

Typo...... STOP talking such utter crap @MrsSkylerWhite 25C is warm. Stop spouting such utter bollox.

Dibbydoos · 06/01/2023 00:43

I would suggest he gets his own place tbh. Lifes to short to live with people who cant work together. The alternative is to get a smart reader to record his excess energy use and charge him for it, but you and tge other ledger will still have sleepless nights etc, so it's not a good solution. Ref a new lodger take up references.

BradfordGirl · 06/01/2023 00:54

I am sure if he could afford his own place he would have chosen that.

Longtimelurkerfinallyposts · 06/01/2023 01:58

Your home, your rules. And as a lodger, he doesn't have the same security of tenure (or liability to pay his own utility bills) that a tenant in a self-contained dwelling would have.

Agree with other PPs that giving him 4 weeks' notice now is probably a good idea; hopefully you'll find someone else who's a better fit in your household, and feel able to be more explicit with them before they even move in about temperatures/ other expectations.

For the rest of this month, it might be a good idea to use the boiler's timer to limit its operating times, and put a lock on the cupboard it lives in (so there's no way anyone can over-ride it, even if they mess around with individual TRVs or thermostats).

I'm wondering if part of the reason he's feeling cold at such a high room temperature is because his bed and chair are at a low height, and the ceilings quite high? or if there are any draughts? are the curtains/ blinds insulated at all? anything you could rearrange that would make it more cosy for the next lodger?

Original poster
Mumskisail · 06/01/2023 05:37

Longtimelurkerfinallyposts · 06/01/2023 01:58

Your home, your rules. And as a lodger, he doesn't have the same security of tenure (or liability to pay his own utility bills) that a tenant in a self-contained dwelling would have.

Agree with other PPs that giving him 4 weeks' notice now is probably a good idea; hopefully you'll find someone else who's a better fit in your household, and feel able to be more explicit with them before they even move in about temperatures/ other expectations.

For the rest of this month, it might be a good idea to use the boiler's timer to limit its operating times, and put a lock on the cupboard it lives in (so there's no way anyone can over-ride it, even if they mess around with individual TRVs or thermostats).

I'm wondering if part of the reason he's feeling cold at such a high room temperature is because his bed and chair are at a low height, and the ceilings quite high? or if there are any draughts? are the curtains/ blinds insulated at all? anything you could rearrange that would make it more cosy for the next lodger?

This is something I wondered about too. There's double glazing and the curtains are a lovely thick fabric, hand made with thermal lining and a blackout roller blind.

When I had a chat to him about it I gave him a wireless thermometer that links to an app on my phone and put it on the bed as we talked. It measured the same as the TRV on the radiator so as I explained, that shows the TRV is accurate (he was insisting it isn't which was why he was pulling it off, and why he was fiddling with the valve and pin on the radiator etc).

As I mentioned, the duvet on his bed looks thin so I asked if he knew about togs and suggested getting a warmer duvet. I have a few in the loft so have offered to lend one to him ever since our first chat in September but he insists his own duvet is warm enough (yet every night he disconnects the TRV and cranks the heating onto full blast).

I just don't get it to be honest. I actually feel sad that I can't get through to him. I don't want a battle. I've just changed the setting to 23 degrees now but in any case he does what he likes

OP posts:
Goodadvice1980 · 06/01/2023 06:27

Give him notice to leave. He’s not respectful of your home or boundaries. If he’s that bothered about living in 25 degree heat he can get his own place & pay all the heating bill.

Talia99 · 06/01/2023 06:28

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 06/01/2023 00:35

Typo...... STOP talking such utter crap @MrsSkylerWhite 25C is warm. Stop spouting such utter bollox.

She’s saying that 25 degrees goes beyond warm to the realm of being too hot. Are you seriously saying you think 25 degrees is cold!? Because that’s the only alternative left if it’s neither warm nor hot.

If so, I think you are definitely an outlier in the UK and people who don’t think 25 is cold are not ‘talking crap’ as you suggest.

MzHz · 06/01/2023 07:57

BradfordGirl · 06/01/2023 00:54

I am sure if he could afford his own place he would have chosen that.

Ha ha, but then he’d have to heat it…

SamphiretheTervosaurReturneth · 06/01/2023 08:08

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 14:13

@Quincythequince If I was your tenant I would take you to the small claims court for the cost of a room at premier inn for a month minus the rent I would have paid you. I would probably win as well. And a very easy legal process to do.

Really, you wouldn't!

sgtmajormum · 06/01/2023 08:16

If it was just the additional cost of the heating I would increase his rent, but as the heating being on at night is disturbing your sleep I would give him notice to quit.
You have already gone through reasonable measures and he still ignores you.

Zonder · 06/01/2023 08:20

Have you given him notice? I would want him gone as much for his lack of respect as for the heating itself.

My biggest surprise from this thread is how many people are saying they wouldn't want to wear a fleece or use a blanket. There are some very wealthy wasteful and not very green people on MN.

WisherWood · 06/01/2023 08:26

I actually feel sad that I can't get through to him. I don't want a battle.

Find a man, any man will do. Give him a script, get him to read it to the lodger. You'll magically find your words become clear and accurate when said by a man.

DesertIslandCondiment · 06/01/2023 08:33

BradfordGirl · 06/01/2023 00:54

I am sure if he could afford his own place he would have chosen that.

Well if he can't afford his own place then he needs to read up about the cost of living crisis. Try to be intelligent and understand that not many people in the UK right now have their heating on at 25 degrees and walking around in their summer clothes.

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