So, I say DP but we don’t live together. But in a serious relationship for last 18 months post my divorce. I have 4 kids fairly busy house and two dogs. Think standard issue smallish Cockapoo / non-yappy types.
Both are pretty well behaved I think in the scheme of things. Will happily go into their crate together when directed and curl up together. Easy to walk and past puppy stage of being mental.
They do however bark if they hear the doorbell / someone on the path. They don’t bark otherwise. They sit on the floor or dog beds never sofas or beds or bedrooms. My house does not smell of dogs at all. They don’t shed hair or slobber or fart 😂
i knew when we first met that BF was not a dog person - and that’s ok. In an ideal world he would be but I thought he doesn’t need to love them. I thought the logistics of my kids would be more of an issue tbh - he’s never been married has no kids though has had two long term partners. He’s used to a VERY quiet house and is quite noise sensitive - which I get - I am too.
But it feels like now that the relationship is very established he makes no effort to hide his utter dislike of them. Recoils when they bark at doorbell, when they brush past him. Won’t refer to them by name - just “that dog is at the dishwasher” and so on.
He will come on dog walks but I suppose under sufferance. I just find it really upsetting and hostile. I love him and lots about him - he is thoughtful kind and caring. He does get (and like) that having the dogs makes me feel safer when kids are with their dad and stepmum and im on my own.
I feel that were the situation reversed I’d make some effort to try and overcome this. Say if he had a cat (I’m not madly into cats but if he loved it …)
my dogs are likely to be around for another 5 years. The thought of being with someone who shudders each time they are being … just dogs makes me sad.
He mentioned it last night just after midnight and it kind of spoiled otherwise lovely evening. Would IBU to ask him to see if he could try a little more or AIBU?