He woke up with a cold…. First date

[WorriedWarrier]

Supposed to meet this lunch time…. He’s woken up with a cold.

He doesn’t want to meet, right?

Plenty of workplaces don’t WANT people coming in with colds or anything that might spread.

@WorriedWarrier give him the benefit of the doubt ONCE.

Has he actually cancelled or just told you he has a cold?

He might be thinking you’ll be annoyed at him for turning up with a cold and giving it to you, so is now giving you the chance to say if you’re uncomfortable with that.

I have a cold at the moment and am having to blow my nose every 15 mins - not exactly attractive.

I think he’s done the right thing here mentioning it.

i’d reply and say you don’t mind and would still like to meet him - but understand if he feels too unwell.

also don’t expect him to be on top form if he’s feeling a bit run down

What did his message say? Has he cancelled or was he giving you a heads up? I think he is asking you to make the decision?

Nope, total excuse. Sack him off.

Hmm... I'd believe him, but leave the ball in his court regarding rescheduling.

I had a man cancel the morning of our first date as he had "covid", I never heard from him again.....

Ffs op can you provide more info i.e. respond to questions above, if you want advice?

I’m guessing he just woke up and had a slight cold and thought he fancied an easy day for himself, regardless of who else had set aside their day to meet him. You know…a flake. He’ll meet you again when he’s more up for it. Whether you want to be with someone like this is another matter. But certainly don’t take it personally or take him very seriously.

Did you not ask how he was doing? He might be dead or something

Hi.

he just said he had a cold and didn’t want to see anyone:

none “I want to see you, let’s rearrange”.

so I responded back saying hope he feels better soon.

Yesterday I was 100% fine, today I woke at 3am with an itchy painful throat - enough to get up and gargle salt water. I’m completely full of cold today, I doubt anyone who saw me yesterday would believe how rubbish I feel/look and I had 8 hours sleep

Probably just has a cold?
i don’t think I’d want to go on a date with snot streaming out of my nose, not very alluring!

😄😮

Of course I did... I texted him a few times after that... He read the messages, never replied...

I wouldn't read anything into this. Lots of colds going around atm and maybe he's feeling shit/tired/snotty. Maybe he wants to make a better first impression than being tired and sneezing all over you and not wanting to drink and needing to go home early. I wouldn't want to go on a first date with a cold.

Sorry didn't see there was no follow up. That's different, might be an excuse.

DH has this horrid cold virus that's going around, he looks and sounds terrible. We just cancelled our NYE plans because he has a cold. We'd love to go, it's not flaky, it's just a horrible virus and really antisocial to turn up and spread it around.

If he's not done anything else to make you question him, just take him at his word.

Wait for him to rearrange the date though. If he doesn't or if he cancels a second time then you have your answer.

Agree with this! I’ve had someone postpone a date because of the shits recently - I wish he’d said a cold We did meet up after that but in the back of my mind was the image of him running to the loo every 10 minutes which did somewhat ruin the mystery!

See if he rearranges and in the meantime feel free to arrange other dates too.

OP, you did the right thing by replying ‘get well soon.’ Now you will have to leave it and see what happens. A’ cold’ could be sniffles or it can be really bad with headaches, sore eyes, cough etc.

Leave it. If nothing happens. Move on. Don’t take it personally.

There are a lot of colds going round at the moment... some are just sniffles. Some are actually Covid. And others are the start of norovirus. (It's awful. Really awful. You don't want to catch it.)

He's probably told you he's ill because he doesn't know what your appetite for risk is and if you'd rather be cautious and cancel or meet up anyway.

I'd take him at his word.

I also wish my colleagues who had 'just a cold' hadn't come into the office, as we all ended up going down with noro. I have never felt so damn sick.

It's a COLD.

And I wouldn't want to CATCH IT.

Why? Could he not just feel really shit and not want to go on a first date? I think you’re assuming it’s just a sniffle, but he might have that horrible streaming cold.

Ah right he might be dead then

Agree 100%

It may not be a cold. It could be Covid- they often both seem the same to start with.

Sensible to cancel.

Just relax and see if he contacts you again.

Wish him a breezy 'Get well soon' and wait and see. (You could also add' Let me know if you want to rearrange, anytime.')