Dressing “sexy” infront of in laws

[Silentsalamander]

aibu to dress “sexy” infront of inlaws.

Obviously not talking lingerie or boobs spilling out but everytime I see my inlaws I wear sensible boring things that I think they’d “approve of” i.e a long sleeve jumper that would show 0 curves or a buttoned up to the neck floral dress.

…I know it’s normal to dress conservative when you first meet partners parents, but is it normal to then dress “sexier” if that is your normal style? For example I would normally wear over knee boots with tight jeans, or a mini skirt with black tights or a tight top (I’m E cup) so would look very “sexy”.

I just want to be myself, and not this polite librarian character ive created or AIBU and should tone it down infront of them?

This. ^ People are taking the mick/mocking/trollhunting because of the utter absurdity of the OP's posts. I just snorted slightly and rolled my eyes when I read the first post, because it's so pathetic, and I KNOW people like the OP. and avoid them like the plague when I see them.

I’m shocked at the comments on this thread. Women referring to another woman’s dress style as ‘tarty’, others making reference to prostitutes - how utterly disappointing.

OP has made a thread about wanting to wear sexy clothes in front of her PIL.

It’s odd that you’d want your PIL to think your clothes were sexy - jeans and boots are not classed as sexy, they’re just normal clothes.

Wearing a tight top to show your boobs off is tarty.
As someone with big boobs it is impossible to hide them but I know that wearing a tight top will definitely draw attention to them, so you have to questions someone’s motives if they want to wear this in front of their PIL.

@KimMumsnet

Hi, all. Just popping in with a reminder that trollhunting is against our Talk Guidelines - if you have concerns about a poster, please do report them straight to us rather than calling them out on the thread.

Now as for dressing sexy.....

<looks down at WFH blanket, slippers and cardigan... backs slowly out of thread>

PHWOARRR!

Yeh I think you would look great in the tight top with your E boobs and your waders on, 🤣🤣🤣

That is a tired stereotype. My niece worked as a librarian while she was a college, and her superior there, and the boss over 23 people, was 50-ish, bleached blonde hair, a-la Hazel O'Connor in Breaking Glass, and a full sleeve of Harry Potter tattoos on her left arm. 3 other young women there - 23 to 27 y.o. all had face piercings, dyed hair, tattoos, and leather boots/converse and vans on their feet. Utterly farcical that some people picture librarians like this...

Nowhere did the OP say she wants her PIL to think her clothes are sexy.

It’s not ok to use a derogatory term to describe the dress sense of a woman.

OP are you going to the in laws house? If so, check if it's a shoes off house, as those thigh high boots may be a little awkward....

I couldn't give a fuck what you think is ok or not ok to say. If I want to call someone's clothes tarty I will.

Whatever my views are on what you have said, I have to agree that the thread police on here are very annoying and tedious. You'll be told you sound 'angry' next, and to 'calm down...' 😜 When someone says 'it's not OK to say that' it sounds like they are talking to a 5 year old who said 'nanny's arse is fat mummy...'

This is a really really odd thread.

if you have big tits everything looks too much.

I know - I’ve just gone from a 32g to a 32b. The difference is incredible. I don’t look titty any more

but the saddest thing is the “you look like a prostitute ” and cackling away. Awful.

The style you describe is not so much "sexy" as "stuck in the past"
I haven't seen over the knee boots since 2008 at least.

Time to update your look perhaps?

They’re. Everywhere.

Knee high boots with jeans aren't sexy, they are perfectly appropriate for something like a lunch with the in-laws but your black pvc mini dress not so much.

For lunch at the in-laws house the other day I wore fake leather trousers and a Christmas jumper with slippers on my feet. The time before that was a jumper dress and opaque black tights and slippers.

There is nothing wrong with a cardigan, I like long ones best but you don't need to wear them just because you feel you have to. Just wear normal clothes that you would wear to the pub.

I can never decide between my PVC catsuit or burlap sack when seeing the in laws, it's a dilemma isn't it, OP. Then again, I make anything I wear look so damn "sexy" I'll still have people falling at my (knee-high boot clad) feet whatever I do.

😁

I beg to differ. My AA’s are super sexy…. To the people who are turned on by AAs.

I get the sense that the OP thinks an E cup is a lot bigger than it is, unless she's a teeny-tiny with a 28 band size. Bravissimo's smallest size is a D and they go up to L.

Who wears over the thigh boots in the house anyway?

An E cup is usually saggy when it comes with a small band size. You only get pert attractive breasts at a 26-30 band size when it goes from AA to C. Speaking from personal experience.

@RunLolaRun102 wow. Where did you get this qualification in designating and identifying pert attractive breasts?

I would probably think you were trying hard to appear fast.

It is nasty. It’s horrible.

Op, genuine question. do you never just dress in a relaxed fashion?

as women I think we all know that doing the sexy thing is fine,but very few do it all the time and simply never relax. To always wear tight clothing, mini skirts, thigh high boots etc, is a ballache, no one wants to be trussed uo like a Turkey all the time.

do you never just wear jeans and a t shirt, trainers, flat boots , casual relaxed clothing etc?

it doesn’t need to be either extreme. Buttoned up floral dress or tight clothing and heels. You can still be sexy and classy/elegant/relaxed. It doesn’t always need to be in your face obvious.

sexy is confidence in your self. It’s well fitting clothes and a sense of style. It’s not tits and ass on show at all opportunities. To the extent you even need to dress like that at the in-laws.

if it’s genuinely what you’re comfortable with and want to wear, then do so at rhe in-laws. But the fact you started this different way of dressing in front of them indicates it’s deliberate try hard sexy and not a natural choice.

if you’re married to someone who expects this of you it’s a concern. As is if your whole identity is simply about looking sexual. You are not a piece of meat who simply serves one purpose. To titillate

it’s important you wear what you want at all times, but it’s equally important to make sure it really is what you want.

I’m a bit confused and jealous that my 30E boobs are small and could never be described as sexy 😂

Jesus christ. What OP described as "over the knee boots" have become 'thigh-high' and words like prostitute, tarty and naff have been thrown about.

Who needs misogynistic like Andrew Tait around when women can do it just as well themselves?

If they're a shoes off at the door household then you might as well go in a pair of wellies.