To think toddler swearing isn’t a big deal

[Pottymouthw]

My daughter recently said fuck off recently. I was videoing her and she said it in context, she is two. I tried not to react as didn’t want to make it into a bigger deal. I don’t swear around my kids, or certainly not at them.

I told her dad, sent him the video because the timing was perfect and kind of funny ( I do NOT think children swearing is okay or cute but it happens).
a whole argue started as he said he’s not impressed, I need to find out where she got it from, we recently spent time with family over Christmas. My family also don’t swear around elders or children culturally it’s not the done thing.

Her dad said he feels like someone must be talking to her like that, maybe in my family we think it’s okay but no one is his family ever swore as a child. He said I need to figure out how she learnt this, could be from literally anywhere?! I don’t think hunk it’s a big deal, she doesn’t know what the words mean and I wouldn’t encourage it? Am I really being unreasonable to think it’s not a big deal?

Well I’m definitely not ashamed of myself

I wouldn't worry too much, as you're not a sweary family. if she says that word again, you can just explain that is not a word that we should ever say.

I swear maybe once a day, usually the f word or the s word and my kids didn't pick it up at all. I think they realised that it was not polite or impressive. If they had started to pick it up, I'd have had to stop, but it wasn't an issue, so I happily swear when I want to!

I do love a good expletive.

And neither should you! Don't bite OP some folk just go out their way to make others feel like shite.

Well chosen username op!

But there's a TikTok trend for swearing toddlers that I find really sad and reprehensible.

Gross.

I'd find it mildly amusing if she parroted something once (eg. Adult accidently swears when they hurt themselves, the child parrots back, and then it's not repeated again) or if she mispronounced a word and it came out like a swear word.

It's concerning that she spontaneously used it in a way that's contextually relevant.

It would also bother me if a parent wasn't bothered about their toddler swearing.

Might you have misheard? Mine went through a phase of calling me a ‘chump’ when she was about 3, and it really sounded like ‘cunt’!

Well, she - and by extension, YOU - will be judged.

I wouldn't want children to be near a potty-mouthed toddler.

Come on OP, you blatantly didn’t miss hear her.

It said in your first post ‘I told her dad, sent him the video because the timing was perfect and kind of funny’

You started a thread saying a 2 year old swearing ‘isn’t a big deal’

Most people disagree but at least own your opinion and stop trying to back track on the story

I don't like kids swearing at all. It's extremely easy not to swear in front of a toddler.

She’s hardly potty mouthed it’s the first time she’s said it and hasn’t repeated it again🤨

it could be something else but it definitely sounds just like fuck off whatever it is. I think it’s because it seemed like it was in context that i instantly thought she’s swearing.

@Pottymouthw it’s all good and I bet she’ll turn out just fine 😊
don’t worry about it

*It's concerning that she spontaneously used it in a way that's contextually relevant.

It would also bother me if a parent wasn't bothered about their toddler swearing.*

Yep. Both of these things are my issue too.

Your username is "potty mouth"

I think the OP is getting a bad deal here, she isn't advocating toddlers swearing. Its possible to see something as slightly funny without being right. I also think she has done the right thing in ignoring it, as we all know how toddlers like to push our buttons by repeating things. When my Son was 3, we were trying to park in Legoland, his Dad was driving, I dont drive. Out of nowhere he said "fucking hell there isn't anywhere to park". I was mortified and amused in equal measure. Did he get into trouble for using bad language at school ever, no he knew not to. I'm not going to lie, we do swear a bit at home now but I was very mindful about not doing so when the kids were little. Think some of the posters need to lighten up a bit.

I can perfectly understand a child saying "fuck off" if it's something they have heard I cannot understand a mother not only videoing it but then sending the video on as though it's something to be proud of.

Children, in my experience, mirror what they hear.

At 2ish ds started piping up with "you wanker" at random moments. I was perplexed and wondered if he had turettes. Then I realised he said it when he heard a car hooter. Then I realised that if his papa used the car horn it was usually accompanied with "you wanker". DH got a stern talking to and it stopped - both of them stopped it.

At 3ish and at a new nursery DS started saying I need a piss on my shit when on the lavatory. I knew for a fact that hadn't been learnt at home. I raised it at nursery and was told peremptorily "he didn't learn it here" and the woman was quite unpleasant when I responded that I hoped she wasn't suggesting he heard it at home. I found another nursery.

At 6ish some swear words were brought home from school. DH sat him down with the dictionary and made him write them out with their meanings and learn to spell them on the basis that nobody should use words they don't know the meaning of. Paradoxically the one he moved swiftly on from was "bugger".

Not until DS was about 12 did I hear him use the F word again. When reprimanded I was gently told "oh come on mum, it's only Anglo Saxon for copulation, no need to get your knickers in a twist".

Hoist by our own petard.

OMG people on here are insane 😂
Neglect, seriously? 🙄
OP, you did the right thing. It's not a big deal.
I've just been in town with the kids and there were two blokes on public transport talking and one of them said 'fucking etc..' a number of times. My DC looked appalled but they are older and know they can't use language like that. Your toddler could have heard it literally anywhere.
Everyone needs to chill out a bit.

I genuinely don’t think it’s a big deal. In the context of her using it once. If I spoke like this and she used it all the time then obviously it’s a big deal. So far she hasn’t said it again so no it’s not a big deal.

I have said repeatedly our household doesn’t talk like that, I don’t think it’s cute, I don’t think tik tok trends showing the world their child swearing is cute. But they’re just words. She doesn’t know what she’s doing, she’s not being neglected or any other stupid assumption

@RosesAndHellebores Not until DS was about 12 did I hear him use the F word again. When reprimanded I was gently told "oh come on mum, it's only Anglo Saxon for copulation, no need to get your knickers in a twist".
I think I love your son (just a little bit) for that! 😻

What a load of rubbish. I never heard my parents swear in front me. I've never said a swear word on my life so no I haven't sworn in front of my child.

My dd said fucking hell around 19 months old. She laughed when she said it. I was mortified and said she must never say it. Later that day we went for a walk and DH said it. She turned round in her buggy and said daddy that's naughty! She has never said it again and she is 9 now

My DD said fuck off in front of the Ofsted inspector at the childminders. First time she had ever came out with anything like that! I was absolutely mortified when the childminder told me, but the childminder also knew my DD was not from a family where she was hearing this type of language. She was a bit older, maybe 3.5. She was also at nursery. She definitely wasnt hearing it at home or at the childminders. She went on to be a wonderful now 14 year old. She didnt kill anyone or commit any crimes because she said fuck off once. As long as its not her normal behaviour or encouraged behaviour then I'm sure she will be just fine.

YABU

1. You have admitted that you find it funny.
2. You sent the video to her father, who I am glad didn’t see the funny side.

Your DD has definitely heard is somewhere else, are you sure you don’t swear around her?

I can't bear to hear toddlers swear. It's just wrong!

Best Mumma 🏆