To think toddler swearing isn’t a big deal

[Pottymouthw]

My daughter recently said fuck off recently. I was videoing her and she said it in context, she is two. I tried not to react as didn’t want to make it into a bigger deal. I don’t swear around my kids, or certainly not at them.

I told her dad, sent him the video because the timing was perfect and kind of funny ( I do NOT think children swearing is okay or cute but it happens).
a whole argue started as he said he’s not impressed, I need to find out where she got it from, we recently spent time with family over Christmas. My family also don’t swear around elders or children culturally it’s not the done thing.

Her dad said he feels like someone must be talking to her like that, maybe in my family we think it’s okay but no one is his family ever swore as a child. He said I need to figure out how she learnt this, could be from literally anywhere?! I don’t think hunk it’s a big deal, she doesn’t know what the words mean and I wouldn’t encourage it? Am I really being unreasonable to think it’s not a big deal?

She goes to nursery, she has an older sister. I don’t swear to my children and I don’t swear at them. She may of heard it from her older sister but again she doesn’t talk like that. Maybe in secret to her friends but I asked her and she denied it 🤷🏽‍♀️
She doesn’t play out. We do live near some characters who have arguments in the streets but would be pretty random to just say it now?

MN users are fucking mental. You’ve all sworn in front of your kids. Have a day off.

Don't be ridiculous. Someone clearly has. Where else do you propose she has she got it from then?

Have we?

So if she's stuck to you it logical that he thinks she's picked it up from you. A 2 year old doesn't hear that kind of language once or twice in the street and use it in context.

The fact you are so blasé and sent him the 'hilarious' video would also indicate you are probably the source of the language. Most people wouldn't have sent the video they would have been far too mortified even if they were the kind to use the words themselves.

So she's just said a random group of sounds that just happen, when randomly placed together in a specific order form the phrase "fuck off"
You could put her in a circus for a trick like that.

She's 2, she's could be parroting anyone including conversations/ exchanges she heard in a shop or on the street. I wouldn't see it as sinister or immediately jump to the conclusion that someone had directed those words at her. Don't make a big thing of it or she'll know she's found some magic words and use them to get an effect. My two had a great grandfather who used buggered (for broken) & bloody a lot - as small children they would use those words with him or to do impressions of him but it was their code with him and they never used them away from home / in public.

F off is obviously swearing but I didn't realise "shut up" was an issue for some until a visiting child came in to spell out this terrible phrase to me after DD1 told DD2 to do so!

Of course.

She’s either at nursery or with me… like I may of slipped up talking on the phone or something but it’s not really in my every day language.. I’m starting to think it may be her sister but again there is no way anyone has spoken to HER like that.

It IS a big deal.

No, we haven't.

This. How on earth has a 2 year old picked up this language if it isn’t be said in the home????

@PAFMO

Is spot on. At that age repetition would be required for her to use a phrase and particularly to use it accurately in context.

It’s not a big deal. We say things on the phone or to other adults without even realising it. Don’t make a big deal of it and it will pass. Seriously, it’s not worth a second thought.

I think I'd be a bit shocked at the age of 2 tbh and I'm not a pearl clutchy type. I don't think DD(3) has ever heard that word and even if she did just once I'm not sure she would repeat something in context that she'd only heard once in passing. She's only ever repeated stuff that she has heard repeatedly.

She cracked us up recently by exclaiming 'Jesus Christ!' when DH stood on her foot, but that is a lot milder (and was a reminder to us to be careful what we say as I'm guilty of saying it!).

Sure it wasn't just babble that happened to sounded like it? Half the stuff out of my 2YO's mouth was gibberish

@Lenald

I don't know who "we" is but I can say with certainty that I've never sworn within earshot of my toddler.

If I was him I’d also have been furious if my ex sent me a video of my 2 year old saying fuck off and they thought it funny. I really can’t believe you thought it a funny thing and sent him a video of it. I actually wonder what’s wrong with you.

I don’t believe you 🤷🏻‍♀️

I wouldn’t find it cute or funny if DH filmed our child saying ‘fuck off’ and sent it to me. I don’t think toddlers being encouraged to swear etc is funny or cute, I find it a bit grim. And contrary to a pp who seems to think it’s incomprehensible that anyone hasn’t sworn at/in front of their toddlers - I never have, never would. I don’t see how any situation would warrant me saying ‘fuck off’ in front of small children.

Of course you haven’t.

I just think when your young child suddenly swears, mine did out of the blue, they have normally heard it from someone in the family.
That person may have slipped up and sworn by accident and the child has heard it. It just means you may all have to be more careful about language in front of them. No big deal.

I did not encourage her to swear, and really I sent the video saying did she say what I thought she said? It wasn’t clear as day but it definitely sounds like it.

@Lenald

It makes absolutely no odds to me whether you believe me 🤷‍♀️

Strange that you'd assume everyone does things exactly the same way, though.

Had she said it before or since? If not I'd put it down to toddler babble that happened to sound like it.