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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would this bother you?

287 replies

Grapesontheice · 22/12/2022 15:53

I’m prepared to be slaughtered and accused of greed but in my shoes would you be annoyed by this…..
At work one of my colleagues decided to sign up for a radio competition to win a huge sum of money. To win the money they were asked a question live on air. They didn’t know the answer but I did so I told them and they won. Colleague is now (obviously!) ecstatic to receive the prize money, everyone congratulated them, requested a round of drinks on them and went back to work. My point is, is it unreasonable for me to be upset I wasn’t thanked or offered any of the prize money?

OP posts:
JoAlone2022 · 22/12/2022 18:13

Oh god that would really bother me. How can they not remember you were the one that helped them get the huge sum?

vincettenoir · 22/12/2022 18:18

YNBU

W0tnow · 22/12/2022 18:21

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 22/12/2022 17:39

Well, it didn't occur to OP to enter and she didn't gamble the £1.50 per text or whatever it costs to sign up.

Show quote history

Exactly. She didn’t sign up. The other didn’t have the answer!

W0tnow · 22/12/2022 18:22

Though I could live with half, minus £1.50.

biscuiteer · 22/12/2022 18:23

Yes this really would bother me. Not even a thank you is absolutely shit! Have they managed that yet? I would without doubt give whoever did same some prize money.

WetLettuce2 · 22/12/2022 18:24

They haven’t thanked you because they have no intention of giving you anything.

To thank you, would be to acknowledge your contribution, and they haven’t because they don’t want to share.

rainyskylight · 22/12/2022 18:26

A lot of people here are just massive walkovers.

OP, go over to your colleague and say “gosh, good luck I knew the answer to that one, wasn’t it? Did they say when they’re sending the amount? Here’s my bank details, I thought 50/50 would be about right?”

and then when they say no, say that it would be a shame if someone from the office called up the station to let them know that they’d cheated.

OldTinHat · 22/12/2022 18:30

It would be nice to receive a gesture of appreciation.

catandcoffee · 22/12/2022 18:30

Without your answer she wouldn't have won a single penny.

You definitely deserve a share of the money.

katseyes7 · 22/12/2022 18:30

About 20 years ago, l used to do a lot of competitions. I won 2 holidays within a month.
I invited the same friend to come on both. We didn't get spending money with the cheaper holiday (3 star hotel) but l got £500 with the 4* one.
I shared the £500 with my friend.
I don't drink alcohol, she does. She said she'd keep a tab of her drinks at the hotel and square up with me at the end of the holiday.
When she announced "Why don't we just split the bar bill?"
I'd been drinking soft drinks the entire week. She'd had wine and spirits. Then on the flight home she started drinking, when l'd been expecting her to give me a lift home (her home was close to the airport so we got a taxi to there). She said "How much money have you got, enough for your taxi home?"
I never went anywhere with her again.
If l'd been your friend/colleague, l'd certainly give your something out of the winnings. She wouldn't have them if you hadn't told her the answer.
Some people just take the piss, though.

DaSilvaP · 22/12/2022 18:31

rainyskylight · 22/12/2022 18:26

A lot of people here are just massive walkovers.

OP, go over to your colleague and say “gosh, good luck I knew the answer to that one, wasn’t it? Did they say when they’re sending the amount? Here’s my bank details, I thought 50/50 would be about right?”

and then when they say no, say that it would be a shame if someone from the office called up the station to let them know that they’d cheated.

First sensible response

Oneeyedreindeer · 22/12/2022 18:33

katseyes7 · 22/12/2022 18:30

About 20 years ago, l used to do a lot of competitions. I won 2 holidays within a month.
I invited the same friend to come on both. We didn't get spending money with the cheaper holiday (3 star hotel) but l got £500 with the 4* one.
I shared the £500 with my friend.
I don't drink alcohol, she does. She said she'd keep a tab of her drinks at the hotel and square up with me at the end of the holiday.
When she announced "Why don't we just split the bar bill?"
I'd been drinking soft drinks the entire week. She'd had wine and spirits. Then on the flight home she started drinking, when l'd been expecting her to give me a lift home (her home was close to the airport so we got a taxi to there). She said "How much money have you got, enough for your taxi home?"
I never went anywhere with her again.
If l'd been your friend/colleague, l'd certainly give your something out of the winnings. She wouldn't have them if you hadn't told her the answer.
Some people just take the piss, though.

This story is also rage inducing. Why didn’t you just ask her for your 250£ back to pay the bar bill and the taxi?

nettie434 · 22/12/2022 18:34

I can't imagine not sharing it 50:50. I read somewhere that on the TV show Pointless contestants have to agree to splitting the prize money equally if they win, even though one contestant often does better than the other one. This made me wonder if there had been disputes in the past or if the show's makers correctly identified how unfair some people can be.

Stravaig · 22/12/2022 18:36

If your answer is the only reason your colleague won, then giving you half would be the honourable and ethical thing to do.

Original poster
Grapesontheice · 22/12/2022 18:36

Well we’re finished for Christmas now, locked up and said our goodbyes and it still wasn’t acknowledged. I didn’t feel comfortable talking about it as it would have come across like I was expecting something (only a thank you but none the less something to show appreciation!). I’ve been thinking of what would have happened if I didn’t give the answer then confessed I knew it after they lost. They’d have made my life hell, so either way they’re clearly not a nice person. I’m not brave enough to enter live competitions so no I wouldn’t have taken part, I was happy to help but after the rudeness that has followed I’m upset about that and wish I didn’t bother.
To clarify I wasn’t going to ask for money I just wanted acknowledgement, it’s not me to beg for money, I struggle accepting loose change from my parents for car parks etc, yet even £50 would have helped me with a food shop and would have been like losing 10p to their winnings.
Testina and rainyskylight you did make me giggle, I have thought of evil revenge plans yes but I don’t have the courage to do them 😂
Never mind, I appreciate the responses and support but time to put it behind me now, I don’t want to become bitter and cause a work atmosphere in January

OP posts:
NatalieIsFreezing · 22/12/2022 18:40

I'd be stewing as well, OP. I reckon a few hundred quid minimum would be what most people would offer.

Mari9999 · 22/12/2022 18:44

I would have given you something in that same situation. However, did you offer the information with the expectation of sharing the prize?

If the do not offer , I would not mention it. I would find it embarrassing to be suggesting to someone else that I feel entitled to something to which I have no real entitlement. What will you do if they say that they do not share your sentiment? Your financial circumstances should not factor into this situation at all.

A person with a generous spirit would offer some form of thanks without having to be asked. A person with a strong sense of pride would not ask.

Riapia · 22/12/2022 18:48

If you had given her the wrong answer would you have offered her half of the prize money?

MoggyMittens23 · 22/12/2022 18:50

I think it's a piss take that they haven't offered you anything, not even a thank you!

Original poster
Grapesontheice · 22/12/2022 18:54

If I hadn’t known the answer I wouldn’t have commented at all. I was very confident I was correct, they also chose to accept my answer without question. IF I’d been wrong I’d have been apologetic but you can’t lose money you didn’t have in the first place. Maybe I’m just too generous as I’d be falling on my knees with gratitude if I’d been the winner. I know faced with a huge sum of money many people aren’t willing to let it go, but as many have pointed out they wouldn’t have won without my answer. I’m just shocked at how greedy and selfish some people can be when it comes to money. I didn’t answer with the intention of asking for half of the money, not at all, in the moment with adrenaline high I just done what I thought was best to help another person. But I genuinely expected a thank you, to not get one has left me speechless.

OP posts:
CRG01 · 22/12/2022 18:54

You probably will not get a thank you, OP, because to them that will mean admitting the prize it's rightfully yours.

Id be miffed, too.

Schnooze · 22/12/2022 18:58

How do you know they didn’t know the answer though?

roarfeckingroarr · 22/12/2022 19:00

In that situation I would give you £100-£200 in cash

itsgettingweird · 22/12/2022 19:01

I think she maybe doing the very a British thing here.

She doesn't know if you expect a share or not or if she should give you a share - or how to even approach the conversation.

So it's easier to just ignore the fact she won because of you.

But yanbu to expect a thankyou.

I'd feel compelled to give you at least half if you're answer won it for me!

VladmirsPoutine · 22/12/2022 19:01

Can you call the station and tell them that you gave her the answer assuming it was against the rules to ask/google the answer?