My boyfriend quit his job ...im paying for everything aibu?

[navywallstays]

My boyfriend who I live with quit his job over a month ago,he was having issues with higher management.
Over a month later and no sniff of a job.
He has zero money and I mean not even 50p
I pay the rent -the bills -food etc
His dad lives 5 hours away and is going home for two nights for a funeral.
He refuses to ask his dad for money (his dad has a lot of money ).
He is going home for his aunts funeral and said it's inappropriate.
I have told him I'm struggling with all the rent /bills etc
He has no car now as he can't afford to get it fixed.
It's my birthday Christmas Eve and he's already told me he doesn't have a car.
I have him the money to buy my Christmas present and he has said he will give me it back when he gets a job.
Surely he should ask his dad for some money?
I bought his coach tickets home too

I will get nothing for my birthday /no meal out or even a Christmas drink

Aibu ?

*card not car

He needs to move out until he can pay his share.

Dump him. Sponging is deeply unattractive.

Hope it was a one way ticket

I actually agree that asking to borrow money at a funeral is in poor taste.

People’s emotions are stirred.

Tell him to join an employment agency.

How old is he? Suggest he moves out to his parents.

Tell him not to come back until he has secured a job

He’s right - he’s going home for a funeral. Now is not the right time to ask for money.

He either needs to get a temp job or sign on.

Ask him to move out or better still when he goes home… tell him not to return.

Kick him out until he pays his way. There are plenty of jobs around at the moment he can do as a stop gap

I'm all fairness his dad knows he has zero money so surely he should offer
I just can't afford to pay for us both

You can start work in a factory the following day in the vast majority of areas in the country. Yes it’s only NMW but so what? Get him to join a local jobs page on Facebook and there are always stacks of agencies. Why is he not already doing this for himself? YA-DEFINITELY-NBU.

Fuck that. Why should his dad offer?

Your boyfriend needs to pull his head out his arse and get a job.

FFS raise your bar..

He won't claim UC as he won't attend the interviews and told me he would have a job by 5 week wait

Why did he quit his job? I'd have some sympathy if he was being seriously bullied or something and was having significant mental health issues because of it.
If he wasnt getting on with his boss because he is lazy and was getting pulled up on it then that's different

No, his dad shouldn’t offer.

Your boyfriend needs to get a job, sign on or move out. Stop paying for him or expecting someone else to.

I think asking his dad for money in order to attend his aunt’s (I presume on his dad’s side) funeral is awful and I am not surprised that he doesn’t think it is appropriate, because it isn’t.

I am going to go against the grain here, but if you are living together shouldn’t you be supporting each other through life’s ups and downs (and yes sometimes people leave jobs because of their mental well-being, my own husband did that about six years ago). It doesn’t sound like he has been living off you long term. I am pretty shocked that your Christmas presents are a priority during this time of financial hardship and you will lend him money to buy your Christmas presents but not for him to attend his aunts funeral.

He's a loser.

Get rid.

Then he needs to ask over the phone before he sees his dad. This is not sustainable. The birthday thing, although it is sad for you, I would not mind so much, since circumstances change. But the continuing drain on you has to stop.

How long have you been together?
How long have you lived together?
Did he move in with you?
So, he quit his job with no backup of savings and just presumed you would cover everything?

Don't give him another penny! Pay for bill and YOUR essentials only.

this is not on, he can't be bothered to claim benefits, no wonder he can't keep a job. Every one of us has to do things we don't like from tome to time it's part of being an adult.

Personaly I'd get rid of this man child!

How long have you been together? What age is he?
Willing to pay money he has used the "Bank of Dad" many, many times, and probably knows his father will decline.

Put a limit on it

i had one of these OP you are well rid! it went on way too long and he borrowed so much and refused to do anything to rectify the situation to the point where I was desperate. Not worth it.