Bi or pansexual

[dawnfromgavinandstacey]

I've just been blocked by someone that I know via friends and family. They are semi famous.

They are out and gay and happy.

They have just come out on Instagram as pansexual. I have asked how is it different to being bi.

I am bi.

I'm really sorry if I'm offending anyone but to me it's the same.

You like the person. Doesn't matter how they identify you just fancy them. For whatever reason. You just do. You like them.

I've been blocked and asked snottily if I get the difference.

I will be honest. No I don't. You like who you like. Regardless.

What is the difference. You like who you like. Regardless of if they are a a man or or women.

Have I missed something here?

I think the problem is that some of these terms are trying to cover different areas of human feeling and behaviour while many people think of terms like this as being for sexual orientation.

Logically, since there are two sexes there can be only four types of sexual orientation: to sex A, to sex B, to sexes A and B, and to neither sex A nor sex B. You could translate that into sexual orientation labels of homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, and asexual.

But people want to incorporate a broader range of differences into a broader selection of labels for sexuality as a whole, rather than just for sexual orientation. It can be confusing for those who recognise that beneath all the sexuality labels incorporating gender and levels of desire and preferences and stuff, each person has an underlying basic sexual orientation.

Essentially, I see bisexual as a sexual orientation label, while pansexual is a broader sexuality label like skoliosexual or demisexual.

That's before getting into the split attraction model…

Thomas from MAFS I presume

As I understand it pan is basically a subcategory of bi. Bi can include trans/non-binary people, but pan specifically means you are attracted to people regardless of their sex/gender, or that sex/gender doesn’t play a part in how you experience attraction. I think in practice it’s often down to a preference in terminology or which flag you like more!

Sure, but there are only two sexes, so if you’re attracted to all sexes then isn’t that the same as being attracted to both sexes?

If Trans and NB aren’t sexes so how can they be a sexual orientation?

It’s all so FUBAR it’s beyond belief.

Pansexual may well be said to refer to being attracted to men, women, trans and non binary people, but those categories are still all encompassed in just two sexes, so bisexual fits nicely.

Yea I agree I just thought that if you were bi then like me, if you were open to either sex , then you'd just figure out whether what was on offer would work for you both. Same as men women etc.

For me there is a difference between bisexual and pansexual in that pansexual openly declare that they would date non-binary or trans individuals, not all bisexuals would. It’s very different to be attracted to and not mind the genitalia and happily sleep with both men and women than being equally attracted to a maybe pre-op transwoman or transman.

It’s the exact same reason why I am sure women who are heterosexual wouldn’t necessarily date a pre-op transwoman just because there is a penis still in place. Likewise, liking both sets of genitalia doesn’t mean you like them or are attracted to them irrelevant of the configuration.

I am supportive of trans rights, but I am not attracted to people who are transitioning. I'm bi, I'm attracted to feminine women, and masculin men. A pansexual is attracted to transgender and other non binary. Whereas bi is cis men and cis women.

Is my understanding.

They were an arsehole to not explain their reasoning if you asked in a reasonable tone.

Google news pansexual. - www.google.com/amp/s/metro.co.uk/2022/12/11/mafs-uk-thomas-hartley-comes-out-as-pansexual-17918141/amp/

I'm really sorry to ask. Isn't it the same though. You just like the person. They are just lovely to you. As they are. Just as them. Something in them just attracts you to them.

I'm not in just trying to understand the difference.

Bisexual does not exclude trans and non-binary. That whole thing is how pansexual sprung up in the first place as if all bisexuals refuse to date trans or non-binary people.

Homosexual - same sex attraction.
Heterosexual - different sex attraction.
Bisexual - same and different sex attraction.

I'm bisexual. I don't really care what gender someone is, I might still be attracted to them.

Honestly I cannot be arsed to deal with such willful ignorance at this time of night.

This is really interesting to me. I am attracted to both sexes: I am attracted to people's personalities.

What am I? I always thought I am bi as it's the person for me.

Pansexual is an overt display of your political beliefs whilst talking about wanting to shag anyone.

Bisexual is just getting on with wanting to shag anyone regardless of their political beliefs.

Thanks for explaining that for me. Yes this is what happened.

I'm going to steal this explanation, love it! 🤣🤣🤣

Same thing with bells on.

I've never tended to discuss my sexuality with people unless I'm explicitly interested in them (or they, me). 'Coming out' is fine if that's what people feel they need to do, but I've never felt the LGBT+ alphabet soup, pride or omnipresent rainbows ever really spoke for me. Stonewall did amazing work in achieving legal and social recognition for non-heterosexual relationships, but they now stand for something altogether different and unfortunately no longer speak for me either.

No one cares who I go to bed with and I have similar disinterest in others' sex lives. I've never viewed myself in terms of specific, reductive labels, and I don't compute today's fixation with doing this. The navel-gazing is endless, not to mention tedious.

I'd learn from this situation by simply stopping discussing it, OP. I don't mean you have to be 'in the closet' or view your sexuality as some kind of dirty secret. But in day-to-day interaction it's just not that interesting either.

Thomas from MAFS I presume

^^ that was my first thought. Right drama llama that one

Bisexual is just getting on with wanting to shag anyone.

Bisexuals don't want to shag 'just anyone'. But this a fairly common prejudice. I've even heard it from members of my own family whom I formerly liked. Very glad I've never discussed my private relationships with them, and I now keep them at much more of a distance.

Pan Is liking anyone regardless of gender identity, so including trans and non-binary people.

There is no difference.

I have found that describing myself as 'bisexual' rather than just 'bi' is an easy way of filtering out the wankers at an early stage.

I don't fancy anyone with a 'gender identity' I find all that bobbins a complete turn-off, same as anyone else with strong, faith-based views.