Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think something has happened to my mum?

258 replies

Pippa113 · 06/12/2022 19:10

My mum usually calls atleast once a day, usually more. Every Tuesday she comes here for her dinner and to see her grandchildren.

I spoke to her multiple times yesterday, the last thing she said was that she was going to see her sister today but was quite apprehensive about it because she is off her meds and has been behaving strangely (she has paranoid schizophrenia) and she doesn't like going round when she's like that.

Mum's phone has been off all day, this isn't like mum these days, she's always reachable and always calling. Her sisters phone is off too.

I have a sinking feeling that something has happened to her. I don't know what to do or if I'm being irrational / prejudice or ignorant.

Would I be contacted if something had happened? I can't go down there, 3 poorly DC here and no car.

Would you be worried?

OP posts:
PurpleButterflyWings · 06/12/2022 19:46

Can't suggest anything @Pippa113 that you haven't already done, BUT I don't think it's soon enough to be really worrying too much yet. Sorry to sound cavalier, but I think it's a bit too soon to be worrying ..... yet. It's only just got half seven at night. Not sure how soon the police will take your report with it being so early on (and you only spoke to her last night.) Hope she pops up soon. Not being nasty honestly... Just offering a different viewpoint. I am sure she's OK. Smile

Bearblue26 · 06/12/2022 19:47

Don’t give up with 101, unfortunately they can be extremely busy around this time. They will definitely send officers out to do a welfare check. Hope all is ok OP

Icanflyhigh · 06/12/2022 19:47

Redglitter · 06/12/2022 19:45

In all honesty I would hang up on 101 and redial 999 - before I get shot down, I have done this before and need.told by the police it absolutely was the right thing to do

Even if the OP does call 999 its not going to get the Police out any sooner. Calling 999 just gets your phone call answered quicker it doesn't get a faster attendance. I'd definitely be trying to go round myself

Save
Share
Report

The police prioritise, and with a serious welfare concern, history of mental health and violence, they will be there quickly.

ICanHideButICantRun · 06/12/2022 19:47

If you think that your aunt might be in custody then you could call her local police station and speak to them.

elliesmummy19 · 06/12/2022 19:48

My first thought was that something had happened to your aunt and she’s been taken to hospital, your mum is with her. My phone never has signal at our hospital.

I hope you hear from her soon!

Mrsjayy · 06/12/2022 19:48

Phone the police they will check your mums usual and normal routine has suddenly changed . Take care I hope all is ok

PurpleButterflyWings · 06/12/2022 19:48

Icanflyhigh · 06/12/2022 19:47

The police prioritise, and with a serious welfare concern, history of mental health and violence, they will be there quickly.

Show quote history

Is it not the OP's auntie who has the history of troubled mental health though? Not her mum?

Sixsmith · 06/12/2022 19:49

Can you call the local constabulary direct? Hope all is OK op, I'd be worrying just the same

luckylavender · 06/12/2022 19:49

Remaker · 06/12/2022 19:24

Your post makes it sound like it’s your mum who has schizophrenia but I assume it’s actually your aunt who does.

A couple of times I was worried about my mum and got friends to go round and it was something innocuous like the phone wasn’t working. But one time I jumped in the car thinking I’m going to be so cross if she’s fine when I get there (she’s terrible about keeping in touch) and I found her close to death on the floor. I would call to ask for a welfare check.

The post is perfectly clear if read correctly.

Bobbie1976 · 06/12/2022 19:49

Cara671244 · 06/12/2022 19:13

Is there anyone else you can contact to pop in? If not I would do a welfare check and call the police

I agree with this. You sound a bit reluctant to go. Are you scared? I'd definitely be in a taxi on my way over, or indeed get the police to do a welfare check. What about a neighbour?

PurpleButterflyWings · 06/12/2022 19:49

Not sure how SERIOUS the police will take the report. (I wrote SOON.) Sorry!

CarefreeMe · 06/12/2022 19:49

YANBU

If she usually comes yours and hasn’t turned up then that would worry me too!

I hope the police can do a welfare check and I hope everything is ok x

Do you have a partner or anyone who drives?

Potatomashed · 06/12/2022 19:50

Can you order a cab to the house? Or a delivery?! Track it in your phone and see what happens

Redglitter · 06/12/2022 19:50

The police prioritise, and with a serious welfare concern, history of mental health and violence, they will be there quickly

Yes I know they do. I'm a Police Despatcher. Even with the MH concerns that doesn't mean a fast response. If it's busy it could be hours

Potatomashed · 06/12/2022 19:51

Potatomashed · 06/12/2022 19:50

Can you order a cab to the house? Or a delivery?! Track it in your phone and see what happens

Sorry probably a stupid option but you need to do something and the other options don’t look like they are working out right now. Hope your mum and aunt are okay

Icanflyhigh · 06/12/2022 19:51

PurpleButterflyWings · 06/12/2022 19:48

Is it not the OP's auntie who has the history of troubled mental health though? Not her mum?

Show quote history

Yes, but the mum was due to visit the auntie....

Beaucielblues · 06/12/2022 19:52

Ring their local hospital or mental hospital and ask them if anyone with aunt's name has been brought in today. Your mum could be waiting with her. Happened to me today. I called ambulance for mentally ill friend who is still in A@E waiting for place in mental health unit. Maybe your mum doesn't want to worry you with unwell children. Take care.

Icanflyhigh · 06/12/2022 19:53

Redglitter · 06/12/2022 19:50

The police prioritise, and with a serious welfare concern, history of mental health and violence, they will be there quickly

Yes I know they do. I'm a Police Despatcher. Even with the MH concerns that doesn't mean a fast response. If it's busy it could be hours

But not as many hours as waiting and reporting to 101, which could be tomorrow or the next day before anyone goes out to check.

ChocolateBauble · 06/12/2022 19:53

elliesmummy19 · 06/12/2022 19:48

My first thought was that something had happened to your aunt and she’s been taken to hospital, your mum is with her. My phone never has signal at our hospital.

I hope you hear from her soon!

I agree with this. I would phone your local hospital.
I hope everything is ok.

Batshitcrazy007 · 06/12/2022 19:54

Hope she’s ok and phone has just died it’s awful when you can’t reach someone your mind plays alsorts of tricks on you have you tried the hospitals? If you think your mum might be hurt but am sure someone would answer your mums phone if that was the case xx

Jb2182 · 06/12/2022 19:54

Aw hope everything is OK. Just here to hand hold xxx

Tofucuddles · 06/12/2022 19:55

So worrying! Hope you get an answer soon! 🙏🏻

AngelontopoftheTree · 06/12/2022 19:56

That sounds very worrying @Pippa113
Really hope you hear something soon Flowers If you were my neighbour I would look after your children, or drive you to your mum's house (or her sister's) - anything you needed to put your mind at rest, I would be happy to help.

ScatteredMama82 · 06/12/2022 19:56

Hope all is OK OP. Do you have a friend who could drive you? And one who could sit with your kids? I get you must be frantic, I'd be the same but try to remember there is probably a very dull, sensible explanation.

NameChange1718 · 06/12/2022 19:57

Ask a neighbour for help. You need to know about your mum tonight

Swipe left for the next trending thread