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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

It’s a dog one. Who was being unreasonable?

508 replies

Ohhelpicantthinkofaname · 05/12/2022 18:02

So, I own a friendly, if slightly mad medium sized dog.

today we were out on a walk and was heading back up a footpath with a stream to the side. Most people have their dogs off the lead along this path, it’s nothing unusual.

so I’m walking up the path and my dog is a little way ahead. A child approx 20+ meters away see my dog, screams and runs back to his mum. The child is probably 7-9 years old. I call my dog back so she’s near me.

A man who was with them and I think a friend rather than the child’s father comes up to me and says “that child is scared of dogs”. I reply “ok, well my dog likes kids, but I’ll take her over here” and walked over to where the stream was a threw her ball in so she would just play and ignore them as they walked by.

the man gave me the filthiest look and mutter some choice things about me under his breath.

to my mind it’s better for a child with a fear of dogs to see a dog at a safe distance minding its own business, rather than me panicking and rushing to put it back on the lead, making it seem like there really is something to fear. My dog has good recall and I trusted her not to cause an issue. Also at that child’s age I would have thought some exposure to dogs to try and address what is clearly quite a serious fear would be a good thing, rather than feeding into it by trying to ensure he doesn’t encounter any dogs.

so was I unreasonable for not putting my dog straight back on the lead, and the man was justified for his glaring and muttered insults. Or is it fine to keep her off the lead, occupied and at a safe distance?

The kid passed by without incident btw. If I though my dogs would have actually done anything she would have been on the lead.

OP posts:
SaySomethingMan · 09/12/2022 23:36

Well, ok, your dog likes kids? What kind of comment is that? What are they supposed to do with that information?

Dog owners who just let their dogs walk ahead of them off lead are very irresponsible tbh. You’re one of those.

HikingforScenery · 09/12/2022 23:39

Ohhelpicantthinkofaname · 05/12/2022 19:06

I agree. Knowing the child was afraid there was no way I would have let her anywhere near him. I didn’t even let her get close let alone touch him.

I kind of knew that there would be a lot of your dog should be on a lead at all times and preferably only walked around the block at midnight where it can’t attack anyone sort of responses.

im pleased to see there are quite a few rational responses though. I could have put her back on the lead, but it seemed unnecessary given the situation and the location. The chap behind me actually commented on how well behaved Ddog was.

Show quote history

Is this the chap who was also walking his dog off lead?

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 10/12/2022 00:59

Justdontbejudgy · 09/12/2022 23:32

It's quite clear none of the dog owners on this thread are going to change their views or even acknowledge in the slighest what is driving mine (adverse experience that is dog owners' faults not mine BTW). I'm not nagging, I'm merely not shifting my view and neither are they, with their tone pushing me to respond in an increasingly facetious way....and my, don't you all get SO ANNOYED!!!!!!

My opinion remains steadfast and no one will change my mind, I'm actually finding everyone's annoyance kind of perplexing. No one is forcing you to read my posts, I've been quite clear from the off, yet somehow sticking to my opinion makes me tedious and that I think I'm 'King of the world'..eh alright....As a Republican I wouldn't want to be the King of anything, but that's a whole other discussion.

Kindly keep your dogs on a lead in shared spaces. Thank you and goodnight.

Show quote history

No.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 10/12/2022 01:01

Justdontbejudgy · 09/12/2022 19:32

Read my posts, I've not once suggested there should be any law, just common courtesy in a shared space where people, not dogs, should come first. But hey I'm the bad guy apparently.

Show quote history

My dog would think you're a right twat yes.

But it's fine he won't. Because we're going to carry on as we are!

Afreshstar · 12/12/2022 23:56

Ah Ok do they. Good to know…although I rarely get on public transport nowadays thankfully. WFH and walk around my local area and haven’t been on the tram for a while.

Afreshstar · 12/12/2022 23:57

WiddlinDiddlin · 09/12/2022 10:38

Trams in Manchester do allow dogs now... I always thought it bloody stupid that theres a tram stop right outside the RSPCA animal hospital, but you couldn't take a dog on the tram.

They do have to be well behaved though and if not, like any other form of public transport, they can be asked to leave.

I was meant to quote this in my previous post but it didn’t seem to happen lol

Themisthefacts · 12/12/2022 23:57

Dog owner and think you should have put your dog on a lead

Redebs · 20/12/2022 11:07

Mouk · 05/12/2022 18:06

YABU

You should have the dog on a lead either way, but especially when explained to you that the child was afraid of dogs.

My daughter was attacked by a dog as a toddler and it petrified of dogs. I cannot believe how entitled you are.

Yes, by not putting your dog on a lead you were being massively unreasonable.

So often dogs off leads will run up to people. You wouldn't be able to stop it. You have already said to them that your dog likes playing with children, so it's very likely he will run up to them again.

People should be able to get out into the countryside without being pestered by potentially dangerous dogs. Lots of people have cultural reasons for not wanting dogs running up to them, or have allergies or phobias.

I hope you took his excrement home with you too.

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