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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To cancel plans because of the football?

281 replies

XmasConfusion · 05/12/2022 07:16

Dinner with two school mums next Saturday. Been planned for ages. Don't know them very well..

Me and my family are England fans and been watching and following pretty seriously.

AIBU to not go on Saturday as its England v France?

OP posts:
Florenz · 05/12/2022 22:47

It is a thrice in a lifetime historical event for those who are old enough to remember 1966. I can just about remember 1990.

thelobsterquadrille · 05/12/2022 22:49

Look, I’ll be allowing myself to be caught up in it all on Saturday with my kids and I understand it’s a big deal, but no way is it historical. It’s a quarter final.

But for many fans it is historical, and it will be even more so if we beat France and reach the semi finals.

But MN is very anti-football so I'm not surprised this thread has gone the way it is.

thelobsterquadrille · 05/12/2022 22:52

And for many people, it's just football

And that's fine.

So if you don't care, don't watch - nobody is forcing you to 🤷🏻‍♀️ you can go ahead and have dinner or watch Strictly or have a bath or do whatever you fancy.

What I don't understand is why so many posters here want to force their friends to miss a major game just because they happen to have made dinner plans on the same night 🫤

You can rearrange dinner. You can't rearrange the quarter finals of the World Cup!

FettleOfKish · 05/12/2022 23:00

Florenz · 05/12/2022 22:47

It is a thrice in a lifetime historical event for those who are old enough to remember 1966. I can just about remember 1990.

A semi-final yes. But Saturday isn't a semi-final (as I've now been corrected).

@thelobsterquadrille Don't you worry I'll be out on our Christmas do. Only 4 out of 17 of us are English and only one of those will care about the result; although likely not enough to cancel a paid for night out Wink

eastegg · 05/12/2022 23:03

thelobsterquadrille · 05/12/2022 22:49

Look, I’ll be allowing myself to be caught up in it all on Saturday with my kids and I understand it’s a big deal, but no way is it historical. It’s a quarter final.

But for many fans it is historical, and it will be even more so if we beat France and reach the semi finals.

But MN is very anti-football so I'm not surprised this thread has gone the way it is.

I’m not anti football. I’m not saying it isn’t something to get excited about. But it’s just not historical, that’s a misuse of the word. We’ve been in the quarters loads of times.

thelobsterquadrille · 05/12/2022 23:08

I’m not anti football. I’m not saying it isn’t something to get excited about. But it’s just not historical, that’s a misuse of the word. We’ve been in the quarters loads of times

But if we win, it will be pretty historical as we've only reached the semi finals three times in the last 60-odd years.

For football fans, that is historical.

PearlAlice · 05/12/2022 23:41

Exactly this @thelobsterquadrille

You can rearrange dinner. You can't rearrange the quarter finals of the World Cup!

ilo · 05/12/2022 23:42

I think you know YABU otherwise you wouldn’t have posted, you’d have just cancelled. It’s incredibly rude. But if you value a load of sweaty men kicking a ball around over your friends, then go ahead I guess.

Wheredoallthepensgo · 06/12/2022 00:01

Jeez @thelobsterquadrille how many times can you comment the same points over and over again on one thread? Haven't you got some football to watch? Grin

sashh · 06/12/2022 05:41

Florenz · 05/12/2022 22:47

It is a thrice in a lifetime historical event for those who are old enough to remember 1966. I can just about remember 1990.

LOL.

I was born in October 1966, my mother spent the summer being huge, hot and according to her the only thing on TV was 'bloody football', I do wonder if I absorbed her hatred in the womb.

LimitIsUp · 06/12/2022 06:10

XmasConfusion · 05/12/2022 07:16

Dinner with two school mums next Saturday. Been planned for ages. Don't know them very well..

Me and my family are England fans and been watching and following pretty seriously.

AIBU to not go on Saturday as its England v France?

Fine to cancel

eastegg · 06/12/2022 09:41

thelobsterquadrille · 05/12/2022 23:08

I’m not anti football. I’m not saying it isn’t something to get excited about. But it’s just not historical, that’s a misuse of the word. We’ve been in the quarters loads of times

But if we win, it will be pretty historical as we've only reached the semi finals three times in the last 60-odd years.

For football fans, that is historical.

For football fans, that is historical.

You don’t have to spell out for me how many times we’ve been in the semifinals, thanks. Or talk to me as if the only reason I don’t think it’s historical is because you’ve decided I’m not a football fan. It’s incredibly patronising.

I’ve just asked a massive football fan, without any prompting, whether they think Saturday’s match is historical, and he gave a flat ‘no’.

whynotwhatknot · 06/12/2022 12:56

you could but probably be a waste we're not good enough to beat france

thelobsterquadrille · 06/12/2022 13:05

Well, you've confused me there @eastegg.

I wasn't intending to be patronising - nor do I really care whether you're a football fan or not Confused

I just think pretending this match isn't a big deal is being a bit obtuse really. You disagree so theres not really anything else to discuss 🤷🏻‍♀️

eastegg · 06/12/2022 13:30

thelobsterquadrille · 06/12/2022 13:05

Well, you've confused me there @eastegg.

I wasn't intending to be patronising - nor do I really care whether you're a football fan or not Confused

I just think pretending this match isn't a big deal is being a bit obtuse really. You disagree so theres not really anything else to discuss 🤷🏻‍♀️

I understand it’s a big deal

My exact words from up thread, which you quoted. Now you say I’m pretending it’s not a big deal. You’ve tied yourself in knots.

MillyMollyManky · 06/12/2022 13:38

I think all this thread illustrates is that people for whom the WC is a big deal think this match is a big deal and people for whom it isn't, don't. Not sure anyone is going to be convinced by anyone else and think "well, I'd love to watch the match but statistically I have an 80% chance of seeing an equivalent match in four years' time, so I'll pass" 😂

Lockheart · 06/12/2022 13:43

The prior commitment should always stand unless you're ill, having a genuine crisis, or it's for something like a funeral.

Dropping out of events simply because you've had a better offer / something more interesting come along is very rude.

JudgeJ · 06/12/2022 13:45

Florenz · 05/12/2022 22:47

It is a thrice in a lifetime historical event for those who are old enough to remember 1966. I can just about remember 1990.

I remember the '66 final very well, the boss of the shop where I did my Saturday job was amazed I showed up! She was so fed up because from 3pm I was asking customers for updates, no mobiles etc but a TV shop next door, at 4.35, 5 minutes before the end, she gave in and sent me next door to watch the end, as I walked into the shop Germany equalized! I'm not allowed to watch any sporting event in which there's a UK interest, I get 'permission' to look at the end, or the other night at 88 minutes!

TerraNostra · 06/12/2022 14:08

thelobsterquadrille · 05/12/2022 23:08

I’m not anti football. I’m not saying it isn’t something to get excited about. But it’s just not historical, that’s a misuse of the word. We’ve been in the quarters loads of times

But if we win, it will be pretty historical as we've only reached the semi finals three times in the last 60-odd years.

For football fans, that is historical.

No, it will be historIC. No "al".

Historical means anything in the past. Historic means something in the past that was significant enough to change the course of history.

SleeplessInEngland · 06/12/2022 14:12

The crux of this is how let down the host will feel. From what the OP’s said: likely quite a bit.

TerraNostra · 06/12/2022 14:12

Those saying OP could keep an eye on the score on her phone, surely the point is that OP will want to enjoy the experience with her football-loving family, not with some school Mums who have never mentioned football before.

I remember once my friend and I were invited to dinner at University by a couple of lads. They wanted to cook for us. When the day arrived we realised it was the night of Princess Diana's Panorama interview ("there were three of us in the marriage"). Now that WAS historic.

We went but we made them put the TV on and sat glued to it. One of them got into it, the other was not amused. My friend married the one who enjoyed it!

PinkFrenchie · 06/12/2022 14:30

YABU. If football means that much to you, you should have kept the night free and not accept the invite. The football schedule has been out for ages so you knew there was a chance that England could be playing on Saturday night.

WalkingOnTheCracks · 06/12/2022 15:47

I think a lot of this vitriol is because it's football.

I suspect if it had been, "...a friend just offered me a spare ticket to a sold-out show I've wanted to see forever..." or "...my cousin will be in town for one night before going back to New Zealand..." or "...my partner has just announced a surprise date night in a hotel up West..." there would be less arms-crossed tutting about it being 'rude to make friends feel second best'.

Zebedee55 · 06/12/2022 15:51

I'm going to be watching the football, regardless, although I do feel sorry for one of my daughters friends that had arranged a gender/sex reveal party for her daughter and SIL

People are saying they will have to leave it unless the TV will be on.😚

KarenRoss63 · 06/12/2022 15:52

Agree. Just rude

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