Not to feel comfortable with DH putting cameras up all over the house?

[Iwantyourmidnights]

Please help settle a debate between DH and I.

We have a toddler DS who does lots of the usual adorable/funny/unexpected things, and DH keeps talking about installing cameras in every room in the house so that we can capture all of the funny candid moments. For example today he did something funny with our cat in our bedroom while I was getting dressed, I told DH about it and straight away he said 'this is why we should have cameras up!'.

I do kind of get where he's coming from, DS is his first child, he's an absolutely doting father and he loves taking and watching videos of him and watching him grow up. However, I've just started mat leave and before that worked from home full time. I said to him that I wouldn't feel comfortable knowing I was being filmed all day long when I'm at home alone. Especially in our bedroom where we sleep/get dressed/sometimes enjoy, ahem, private time!

DH thinks I'm the weird one and most people would be fine with being filmed 24/7 big brother style. I think he is terrible at empathy and seeing things from the perspective of others, and most people would feel uncomfortable as I do.

To avoid the inevitable LTB pile on, I just want to say I'm 100% certain there's no hidden abusive/nefarious reason why he wants to put cameras up.

So:

YABU - there's nothing wrong with living under 24/7 surveillance in your own home, stop being a weirdo.

YANBU - DH is the weirdo wanting to film every moment of every day on the off chance DS does something funny.

probably the former, as no one said anything about preferential treatment, also the money goes to the police (the charges for them specially) there are other fees for the monitoring company.

Yes it is weird and creepy and when would he actually have time to watch any of it?

Who else would he show it to?

In the future, please laugh loudly in his face and say no way, when he comes up with more of these stupid ideas.

its actually really common for these kind of cameras to be hacked so I wouldn’t risk it

It does record 24/7.

also I’m not persisting, I’m replying to people asking questions and directing posts at me.

goodness me 😂

I’m very confused by this, as well, sorry. Why don’t you have them in the loo/bathroom if you have them everywhere else? I don’t understand your response/question re triggers, either.

I can see why you must need so much security with your attitude @Vitalsigning

I do have them in the loo and bath. As stated in a previous reply.

Some really shocking levels of understanding this morning, maybe you all need a coffee and slice of cake!

Au contraire, Vitalsigning, you are the one coming across as rather silly.

Obsessive and weird IMO. Whatever happened to living in the moment?!

But has successfully derailed OP's thread. Look who everyone is talking about now - not the OP and her concerns.

That’s a good point. Hours of wading through 24 hours of footage 7 days a week trawling for cute behaviour. It would basically be a full time job!
And who decides what is or isn’t cute? Would you have to replay it a few times to decide? Is falling off a sofa cute or not cute? What if they cry, is it still cute then?
You’d have to send it to relatives for their opinion then they would know you had cameras everywhere and refuse to ever enter your house again!

Vitalsigning, do you tell visitors that they will be monitored continuously throughout their visit?

You sound paranoid, unless you live in a highly dangerous part of the world of course. (But if you’ve had a traumatic bad experience then apologies as I haven’t read every post).

No, because most will see the cameras and have them themselves so understand.

As mentioned before this isn’t uncommon among my friends, general acquaintances and even wider in terms of work colleagues etc.

Red flags all over this OP. You need to find out who you are ‘really’ married to.

Again, if people quote me and ask questions I will reply.

Maybe direct the accusations of derailing to those doing that.

Weird. It’s a definite YANBU from me.

YANBU

Blimey. I'm so sorry you live in such a rough area! Can you move?

🤨

I should add i do live in a very rough area, its actually come up on MN a few times as a place people have enquired about and its all "noooooo don't move there unless you're desperate" 😬 but I feel surprisingly chill about it. Even more so now!

security wise though, how does it even make you more protected having cameras all through the house. Once people are in they’re in and chances are would have left again before the police got there. I’m not even sure what difference a camera makes. If any faces are to be picked up they could be picked up on external cameras

An alarm trigger to police or security would do the same job

And I don't get this trigger thing that only sets off security/favorable police response only if its triggered. So you get a 'delivery' and the dude just forces their way in... whats the trigger then? Is it like a panic button?

Tell him to use his memory ffs. Also when would he have time to watch all the footage?