To be proud of my son for standing up to his bully?

[Spreeofthemoment]

My DS is in y6. One boy in particular has been making his(and a few others) life hell he’s it wanted to go to school because of him. Well today, he snapped and floored this boy after he came and pushed DS over(he’s always pushing him!). This boys nose was bleeding. I got a call off the head and told him I won’t be punishing my son and that I’m proud of him for standing up for himself and showing this boy he won’t be bullied anymore, as clearly the school weren’t doing anything to protect my son!

thepenismightier

Once you go down that violent route, you would be wondering what was coming next. A real bully is not likely to take being "floored" on the chin.

Hmm. Have you ever experienced life as a human being?

I went to a rough high school and was bullied for the first couple of years. Loads of other kids got bullied and the few who did finally fight back certainly had things a lot easier, unlike the poor sods who were too frightened, or weak to do anything about it.

The teachers didn't give a damn.

Also, violence never solves anything

Except it does. It’s an uncomfortable truth some people don’t respond to anything else.

Bully's mum?

Well done that lad!! The only way to stop a bully is to play them.at their own game. I should imagine OP, that you're son is now a hero among his friends
My son did this, after being hounded for months. He snapped and this other lad went down like sack of shit .
Never bothered my boy again!!

I had the same 10 or so years ago with mine. I told the school we absolutely expected them to follow their behaviour policy but we wouldn't be telling our son he did anything wrong. I also suggested better anti-bullying strategies would have reduced the problem significantly.

Yes coz that always works doesn't it ! Don't be such a melt

Are you the other boy's mum?

It's the only way to deal with bullies as they won't see reason.

Fair play to your son, hope it taught him a lesson. If he tries to bully him again then do the same until he stops.

'Violence never solves anything' is blatantly untrue. It might not resolve the issue to your lofty standards but it certainly provides a solution. I'm interested in how long those who spout this are usually prepared to allow their children to be bullied.

I would like to hear from all the people who have said YABU to the OP as to how they think a 10YO - who sees no-one actually helping him to stop the continual bullying - should have dealt with it?

And I mean - should have dealt with it, in a way that would actually put a stop to the bullying once and for all.

Please enlighten us.

Hermione and Rufus have never experienced this low life sort of behaviour in their school I can tell you!

He had another choice. The choice is to walk into the building or up to the nearest adult and say X has pushed me. He chose to be aggressive back. I don't think this is OK. No doubt he will receive a consequence at school.

And then whoever he told may decide to implement as I was told by a teacher the other day, "restorative justice", basically having a cosy little chat.

Bugger that.

About the choice to walk away and tell a teacher...

Bullies know all the blindspots, they don't do it in the middle of the playground. They get kids in quiet corners, under the stairs, behind the bushes. If the lad was backed up in a corner, how's he supposed to walk away?

CatherineNotsoMuch
No just a teacher who has to deal with the aftermath of kids taking matters into their own hands.

I'd be more proud if he stood up for other kids bullied too... What about the kids who aren't capable of punching the bully who he now may move onto?

This was also taught in a self defense class for children we went to recently.

Honestly? I'd have moved schools if my child was being bullied so badly that they didn't want to attend and the school was doing nothing about it.

My child wouldn't punch anyone. It's just not him.

The OP should deal with it. Which means working with the school OR phoning the police. It’s beyond stupid to introduce more violence.

It’s a reasonable response that will likely deter him from pushing your son again.

YANBU!

Hahaha but the school and police do nothing.

So then what?

Well that is the route they are told to take but the adult says are you ok? I’ll have a chat with x and nothing gets done. My child had concussion after being punched in the side of the head from behind whilst waiting in a queue. He was asked by a teacher what he’d done to make the other child hit him after I complained. As the school bell had rung they didn’t fill out an incident report as out of school hours. They were queuing in the school hall waiting to be called onto school transport supervised by a teacher.

Bullies know there is sod all the school will do and often over time the victim is seen as the problem as they are complaining about it and requiring attention from busy staff members.

Good for him.
My youngest (Reception age) has been repeatedly kicked, shoved and pushed by the same boy. My DC kicked him back and he's left my DC alone since.

People can only be pushed so far

When I was in junior school I was bullied constantly by a bunch of girls. The ring leader one day pulled my chair out from under me and I fell and hit my head. I sprung up and pinned her against the wall. She never laid a finger on me again! The verbal abuse didn't stop though.

Why would they do nothing?

Move schools then.