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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask neighbour to shop for me?

156 replies

penny4books · 29/11/2022 10:56

Not sure if this will look cheeky.

I'm not close to my neighbour but I have no other options. If you've read my other posts you'd know DS(14) was struggling with his mental health and hearing voices etc. I also suspect he has ASD and was struggling in school. I've not sent him to school for a few weeks and he hasn't mentioned the voices for a while apart from yesterday. He's still struggling to sleep and last night he didn't get to sleep until 5am and then he woke up at 8:30 so he (we) is very tired today and I suspect he'll go back to sleep.

He has a MH assessment in a few weeks. The issue now is he won't leave the house, yesterday he wanted some biscuits which we didn't have so I told him we needed to go to the shops, which he agreed to and got ready etc, I don't drive so we had to walk which he couldn't do as he said he felt dizzy, his head hurt and he was very pale etc so we went home which he was upset about.

I've done an online shop which won't be here until tomorrow but I need some milk and a few other bits for dinner today (mainly for DS as he won't eat what we have in) I was thinking of taking him to the shops on the bus which he might enjoy but he is tired and I'm not sure how he'll be in the supermarket.

I'm no longer with my partner as he wasn't supportive of DS and I need to focus on him at the moment, his dad isn't involved he sends DS a birthday card and that's it, he hasn't seen him for over 2 years. My friends don't live nearby.

My only option is to ask my neighbour, we aren't friends but I know if she asked and was in this situation, I would if I could.

Is this cheeky though? AIBU?

OP posts:
danblack87 · 30/11/2022 15:11

I don't know my neighbours very well BUT if was 'desperate' I would ask. For someone to say 'learn to drive', like that is going to happen on the day of posting is ridiculous. You can leave a child on their own at 14; however, I would baulk at that too as he is clearly not well and has anxiety issues. Uber and Deliveroo are fine if you have a mobile. My friends are not close by BUT if I put out an 'urgent' msg they would understand. Hope you managed to sort it one way or another

diddl · 30/11/2022 15:31

So what happened in the end Op?

Hopefully your delivery has arrived today.

Monkey2001 · 30/11/2022 15:32

Definitely ask politely, if they say no you have lost nothing, if they say yes it might be the start of a more supportive relationship with a neighbour, which is a definite win.

Sennelier1 · 30/11/2022 17:40

I do wonder what kind of environment you all live in, because where I am (a regular mid-sized town in Belgium) neighbours and friends are only a knock on the door or a phonecall away. If you have a problem you reach out and ask for help. No OP, you're not a CF, you're a mom needing help. Jeezes people, what has become of humanity???

Spacebears · 30/11/2022 17:43

Hope you managed to sort some dinner out for last night and get your shopping today OP

wherearebeefandonioncrisps · 30/11/2022 20:42

Sennelier1 · 30/11/2022 17:40

I do wonder what kind of environment you all live in, because where I am (a regular mid-sized town in Belgium) neighbours and friends are only a knock on the door or a phonecall away. If you have a problem you reach out and ask for help. No OP, you're not a CF, you're a mom needing help. Jeezes people, what has become of humanity???

Whilst I agree with you, a request, from a neighbour, to go and buy a pizza is a bit daft.

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