Apologies in advance about the length!
I met this friend around two years ago whilst we was studying on the same course. Whilst it was smooth sailing, it’s been bloody hard work since then.
She struggles with mental health so there’s been countless times me and our other friend have sat with her for hours whilst she has breakdowns, threatens to harm herself etc. These can last between hours and days and she will blow up my phone.
She also does things like meet up with men despite us saying they display red flags, and then cries how awful they was afterwards. I feel she takes no bloody advice from what I tell her. It’s then hours after trying to comfort her before the harm talk stirs up again.
Likewise, any plans made has to be okay with her otherwise we all aren’t going. It was my turn to choose for our date and on the last two occasions she complained and said we should go somewhere else instead. It’s her way or we don’t go at all.
Now my actual dilemma. She has a new flat and this past monday, i sat in her flat (cold, unfurnished, no heating or carpet) for over three hours to wait for the gas man to turn up just because she wanted to go shopping. I was frozen to the bone and when she came back, no thank you but simply complained the man never came.
She’s since asked for money and furnishing despite me telling her i’m pretty broke myself. She’s now taken it upon herself to ask what days i am free and what times so i can watch her flat whilst maintenance does her bits so she can do other stuff instead and be at her part time job.
Now she’s asked me to go on Thursday whilst carpets be put down. I don’t want to go, the flat is freezing, and i have to travel and pay for my own taxis there and back. I’ve wasted hours of my time anyway and i’m tired of being her first point of call, despite us sharing other friends, because I don’t really tell her “no”.
I feel awful but i want to be shot of her. She’s emotionally and physically draining with how much she needs and wants off me, it feels constant. I’ve left the groupchat on many occasions because it’s so overwhelming but she just adds me back and asks me for things again.
I get nothing from the friendship, it’s just me giving all and her just taking it. I understand she has issues but i’m fed up of it now, I want my life back before more favours come flooding in.
Aibu to end this friendship? I just feel bad because she has alot of problems.