Those not wanting children, what’s your plan for old age?

[Katelyn88]

before people pounce on me:
I do NOT expect my children to be my carers, but I expect my children to ARRANGE care and keep an eye on the quality of care and finances.

Those not wanting children - who will supervise your care and finances when you are too weak/forgetful ?

It’s a genuine question. My parents both looked after their parents. Granny lived with us until she passed away. Me and my sister live within 5 miles from parents and inlaws live around the corner from BIL. I have no idea how childless people manage.

My plan for old age would be the same with or without dc but arguably in a much better position if you don't have dc because you save all your money for you and don't have to feel bad about not passing any money on.

Not expecting my dc to do anything about my care in later life. I will look after myself. Hopefully no care home.

I have one child and another on the way. I do NOT expect them to arrange my care or keep an eye on my finances when I'm old. I'm currently doing that for both my mum and my grandfather and it's the biggest source of stress in my life. I will go into sheltered housing early, and work out how to get care ramped up when I need it. If my kids want to be involved - fine, but I will never ever expect it of them.

Why are you asking? What point do you want to make??

it just feels like a nasty little thread

Well OP, you seem to have an answer for everything, and many ways of telling those of us who chose not to have kids or were unable to do so that we are all hopeless failures who will end up decrepit and miserable because we've all been too stupid not to procreate. Well done, I hope you're very happy and proud of your decisions.

And the wet lettuce shows

Rude.
Hardly be changing nappies for two adult men anyway.
No-one is being "hassled", stop being so bloody touchy and over dramatic. You can hide threads you know.
OP, single friends I know have made arrangements with other friends.

What do people do whose children can't be bothered with them and are just waiting for the reading of the will? 🙄

Basically reading your responses @Katelyn88 you just want us all to admit that we made a mistake and we are going to be sad and lonely and probably abused/stolen from in care homes in our very old age. There you go that’s our punishment for daring not to bow to societal pressures/norms whatever and choose another lifestyle other than parenting eh?

I have three children and I am making it clear that I 100% do not want them involved in any personal care .
If I end up in a care home I want them to ensure that I am cared for well ,stop any unnecessary antibiotic treatment to keep me alive ! If I am with it enough ensure they visit regularly with chocolate and wine .
My sister doesn’t have children but my kids will be responsible for her well-being and we are looking at POA for finance,social,health etc .
Just plan ahead and discuss with GP ceiling of care and respect form which covers DNR as well .

@Katelyn88 I do know the law and practice in this area reasonably well. If I lose mental capacity to make decisions about my own health care, the decisions are made in my best interests by the consultant/my GP. That means they have to take my known views into account, not that they do what they "think is best" in abstract. If I've made an advanced decision to refuse types of care in defined circumstances, they would face legal consequences if they DO force that type of care on me. I can't demand types of care, but I can always refuse it.

The point of having that directive in my GP record is that I went to my GP, had a discussion about it, it's witnessed/dated and they will send it to the hospital when they're told I've been admitted. I've asked the acute Trust's information governance team to put it in my hospital record too, but they haven't agreed to that yet.

I thought your child was going to be wiping my star in the nursing home??? That’s always the justification on here when a childless person dares to suggest that the world might be a bit crowded.

I shall be looked after by a team of handsome, muscular male nurses. They will be paid for with the money I have saved by not having children.

Wiping my arse. I prefer my star dirty.

I thought star was a term for bumhole I hadn't heard before. Maybe a short version of chocolate starfish.

How on Earth do you know that?
You have no idea what the future holds? You could become someone’s burden next week!

You hold far more trust in the NHS communication and action than I do!

I very much like this plan.

I'm going to try my luck in the Thunderdome.

Yep.

"Gosh I hadn't thought of it before but am really glad you have made me realise I've fucked up, thank goodness you had the foresight to proceeate when I didn't or couldn't"

I shall be using the money saved not having kids to move myself into very high quality sheltered housing with a care home on site that I can move to should I need it, whether temporarily or permanently.

I will move when I am still young and active enough to settle into my new community and a couple of my child free friends will be buying/renting on the same complex.

I shall employ a reputable firm of solicitors to oversee my affairs should I become incapable, giving them power of attorney. My friends will be named as POAs too so if any of us are still capable we can keep an eye on things for each other, although happy for them to outsource to the solicitors.

I've cared for many people at the end of their lives. An astonishing number of people have multiple children who they don't see at all, or who they do see but who simply will not get involved in making arrangements for them. Experience tells me that people who think having children means they'll automatically be invested in your life when you're in your 80s are extremely naive. Those types of course tend to be rather contemptuous of childless people also. An interesting correlation.

I have a child. A profoundly disabled child. My plans for old age are to stay as healthy as possible for as long as possible so I can keep looking after my child.

I have a ds, I'm hoping by the time I reach old age the dignity in dying campaign has won the right to die as & when you choose & if so I will be taking full advantage of it rather than be a burden on him.

Was reading just the other day about a billionaire whose family are fighting not to be the ones looking after him.
He's provided a luxurious life for all his family yet in his time of need, none want to know.
Will probably end up in a care home with no visitors.
Having children doesn't guarantee anything OP.

My childless and singe fellow friends and I have hatched a (slightly drunken) plan. We’re getting a holiday apartment development somewhere lovely in Italy, Greece or the like. We’re all moving in, and employing some lovely young men to look after us. Lots of sunshine, G&T at 4pm every day, and our pals on hand.

Our plan may fall down when we look into healthcare/care of the elderly in said locations, but meh, we can dream. 🤣🤣