Hendo - Feel like crying!

[TeaPlzx]

Hi! First thread here. I'm (F/29) attending a close friends hen do, there's 9 of us staying in a large, swanky cottage (pool, hot tub, sauna, etc.) The bedrooms are made up of multiple king size/double rooms and there's one small room with a bunk bed (designed for kids) and pull-out single (mattress on the floor). I can't express how different this room is to the others, imagine an empty room, with tiny kids bunks and a mattress, that's the extent of it. No wardrobe, no cosy lighting, etc.

Each person has paid approx. £300 for a 2 night stay, including a stripper at the venue and food. Alcohol will have to be purchased separately...
Everyone has been placed in double/king sized rooms (some are sharing, but others not), all with ensuits, however, I've been assigned (without discussion) the small room on my own, without bathroom (will use the "family" shared bathroom). I feel this anger, that I'm paying the same as everyone else, they're all in 5* luxury beds with their own bathrooms and I'm on a pull-out style frame/matress on the floor.

I'm most frustrated that it wasn't even discussed with me, just assigned/assumed I'd take that room. I've briefly raised it with the organiser and she's stated she offered the largest rooms to those sharing (mostly siblings/mums with daughters) and the other two people who aren't sharing (like me), one is pregnant and the other is mother of the stag. Am I unreasonable to still feel upset and not want to be in the tiny bedroom with mattress on the floor? If she feels too embarrassed to allocate that room to MIL, or to herself even, why should I be in there?
I'm really not sure where to go from here, but I'm feeling VERY bitter about it al.

I'd be really miffed too @TeaPlzx. I can see why the organiser had made those decisions, but she should have approached you before it was finalised to explain.

How do you know how big the bunk beds are? Aren't they usually the size of a single bed. I've happily slept on the bottom bed of a bunk before and it's no big deal.

i am sorry if everyone has paid aprox 300 each then people sharing have paid 600e for the double room. As people have daid that 300e doesnt cover your room, it covers the entertainment, food, accommodation plus i am sure contributing to the hens night. I actually think 300e for two nights is pretty good value. And i have been on a good few hen parties aswell as my own. I think you are being very unreasonable

I'm suggesting it'd insurmountable suffering, but there's a clear diff on rooms and personally I'd have reflected it in the cost bad offered it out first.

There's one single room, it is bunks but it's only £150.

Tbh £300 a night for a double room,I'd expect the stripper to get dressed and turn into my personal butler!!

With a min £1200 a night budget, I'd have expected somewhere with 5 double rooms and let the bride, MOB, MOG, or pregnant woman have her own room

He'd be more use if he did @SleepingStandingUp

Tell her that you need a discount. Unbelievably cheeky.

I was wondering where on earth "Hendo" is. 😂

If I was going to a Hen Do with my sister or other close relative and then got “drawn” to share with a random
person I would be mightily pissed off.

A stripper. Honestly didn't think that sort of stuff went on any more. I wouldn't have gone for that one reason.

Can you not sleep in the bunk bed? They're a standard sized single, no?

Me too!!

I'd be delighted to have a room to myself rather than sharing. You're not going to be spending any time in the room apart from sleeping.
Try to put it aside and enjoy the celebrations.

I think the organiser has tried her best , it's a thankless task . The only thing she could have done differently is to explain the situation to you in advance. Your £300 is for use of the house, entertaining the 'Hen' etc .It's one of those situations where there is no fair way to split things , after all some women are sharing. Going down that rabbit hole would just cause unnecessary upset all round.It's only for a couple of days .

I thought you had a valid point, but her reasoning over room allocation seems logical. I personally would rather sleep on my own in a shit room, than sharing with someone I don’t know or Aunty Brenda in a posh room. Just get on with it.

If OP pays less for this room, then people who share also need to pay less because they’re sharing, while others like pregnant lady have a room for themselves. But then maybe one shared room is considerably bigger than pregnant ladies not-shared room, and….that’s exactly why I’d never organise a hen do 😂😂

Pregnant lady needs to be near a loo

I think since you're there it's too late to get money "back" on the room, but what I think the organiser should do is count you out when buying the alcohol, divide the cost between the rest of them as a "thank you" to you for taking what is quite obviously a crap room.

I agree, all rooms should be of the same standard if you are all paying the same, the organiser should have booked accommodation accordingly.

I've never seen a bunk bed that would be too small for an adult woman to sleep in, unless she's going to drip feed that she's 6 ft 7 in tall.

You’ll only be sleeping in there and will prob be slightly/very pissed so don’t worry about it.

stripper though 😳

I'm sure bottom bunks are just normal sized single beds. I've slept in them several times and I'd rather sleep in there on my own than share a room tbh.

Perhaps you also think the OP should think herself lucky she has a blanket at all? That she should be content to curl up in a ball on the floor just because she isn't elderly (the MIL might not be either, btw) or expecting and hasn't come with a sibling?

The OP isn't asking for it to be 'all' about her. She's (by my understanding anyway) upset at being treated like a second-class citizen when she's paid as much to be there as all the others.

If anyone's 'entitled' in this scenario, imo it's the hen, expecting people to pay so much to celebrate her marriage (especially with a stripper involved, soooo classy 🙄). This kind of thing just fuels my belief that 'destination' hen dos and the like are very entitled and 'me, me, me'. The OP isn't the one in the wrong here as far as I'm concerned.

I wouldn’t actually mind a room to myself. Tbh I would probably use the bunk bed. If it’s the logical way to allocate rooms considering those who are travelling together/family/pregnant then it wouldn’t bother me. Wouldn’t be looking for money off either. £300 isn’t just for the room. More offended at money being spent on a stripper, that really would irritate me.

I’m really confused how if it’s a swanky cottage that one room is literally a mattress on the floor,

I think it's a day bed, smaller than a single, with a pull-out mattress. I'm picturing something like this...

I thought it was a typo for Hendon. I once lived there, & it made me feel like crying.

Clearly it should have been discussed with you first, and that room offered with a discount. It only needs the other 8 to throw in an extra tenner each to bring your cost down considerably. You could still ask for a reduced rate now.