16 year old in hospital, adult mixed ward.

[Teenangels]

My daughter and I are currently sitting on a chair in the waiting area, to be taken up to a ward, she is 16 only just and been diagnosed with an appendicitis, she has been given morphine, so is sleepy and

I have been told that she will be going up to an adult mixed ward to wait for surgery and that I am not allowed to go up with her.

I am actually furious that my 16 year old will be surrounded by adult men, she is a child how is this allowed to happen.

In my eyes she is still a child, she can't get married (without my permission) but can be treated as a child.

AIBU and over reacting or AINBU to feel she is being totally let down.

Please contact your local PALS (patient liaison), find the one for your hospital online. Tell them how worried you are that your sick 16 yr old girl is sharing with men, you consider it to be a safeguarding issue and your daughter is scared and upset. Ask them to intervene on your behalf.

It depends on the hospital.
Some won't.
There's actually a sign outside Sheffield children's hospital (i was there Monday) directing 16yo to the adult hospital.

Yes, I have! I volunteer my time in one every weekend. Which is how I know that ill people in busy, brightly lit wards, are likely to have little to no chance of attacking each other. And that nurses and doctors time means literally life or death to some people, so they can’t be spending it on awkward parents.

I'm also a bit confused by OP post because I would consider 16 an adult - can get job, relationships, have sex, can marry with consent of parents. I don't think it would be right for a 16 year old to be on a ward bay with infants, and might also create safeguarding issues for the very young babies and children.

'She does not want me to leave her, she has asked me what will happen if she dies.My daughter has never had an operation before.'

Tell the ward staff as she is 16 you are not going anywhere. If you get an unhelpful member of staff ask to see who is in charge keep going higher until you get someone who agrees of course you will stay with your 16yr old.

When I was a student nurse in the 80’s we had 8 year olds going for tonsillectomy’s. They were on ENT so there were adults on the wards too.
Obviously we kept the children in separate bays but parents were not allowed to stay on operation day.
It never occurred to me that it was hard for the parents to leave them.
I can’t imagine it now.
Tbf the dc were much more rowdy than the adults the day after the operation.

Did I just fucking read that right?!

Worrying about the possibility of being raped so that you can access life saving medical treatment is being minimised as a first world problem?

@Mamarsupial are you seriously playing the "someone has it worse than you" card to minimise rape??

It shouldn't be a thing someone in hospital should even have to THINK about, let alone try to justify their concern. FFS.

What a place of privilege you're in to consider that a first world problem, and what a bizarre use of whataboutery.

Yes Op, go off and leave your 16 year old alone in mixed bay with elderly men with their arses out while she awaits a surgery on her own at 16 with no single sex facilities and no nurse in the bay keeping watch because some silly bats on a forum think it's fine because there's other kids in the world literally dying for healthcare.

If this is the measure used to gauge what's acceptable from the NHS then the whole system is fucked.

Fuck me, it isn't a race to the bottom.

It's terrible that children die in other countries because of a lack of doctors. That doesn't mean it's ok to overlook safeguarding here. The idea is to raise standards in other countries, not lower ours to match theirs

‘Minuscule’…must be nice to live in a world where the risk is that small.

Fucking ridiculous attempt to race to the bottom.

Rape and sexual assault in hospitals is not as rare as you think, or as it should be.

Or should those women/girls just be grateful they had a hospital to be raped in in the first place? 🙄

Some bizarre agendas showing up on this thread.

Bit confusing, thought you meant mixed together. I've been on a mixed ward, female only bay, it's fine.

agree with this.
also setting up youngsters to be anxious rather than logical.

Why is it either/or? Do you think those of us that think a 16-year-old female patient shouldn’t be on a mixed ward think “but while I’m at it, who cares about children dying worldwide!”

In any case, sexual assault and rape in hospitals has risen significantly over the past few years: www.google.com/amp/s/amp.lbc.co.uk/news/rape-and-sexual-assault-in-hospitals-has-rocketed/

I would refuse to leave her and clearly state why (she is only 16 and needs her mum with her, plus you have concerns about safeguarding). Broken record approach and do not budge. I am betting that no-one will make you leave.

Could you Google the safeguarding children policy of the trust ? See if anything related to minors on adult wards?

Surely it isn't sensible to behave like this in A&E when the priority is to get the patient on to a pre op ward as soon as possible?

As other posters have said it would be unlikely to be a mixed ward with the sexes combined.

Whilst I can appreciate POV about the current state of the NHS, this situation is really not good enough. A 16 year old who is unconscious, immobile and at risk shouldn’t be on a mixed ward. Even aside froM the very real physical risk, what about her mental health. I know that my 15 year old would struggle huegely no this scenario.

id do what others suggested. Refuse to leave and escalate. Which nhs trust are you?

@Teenangels hope you are your daughter are Ok.

I hated being alone on a hospital ward at 26 years older earlier this year - let alone 16 years old. I kept seeing the same man peering at me and it made me uncomfortable… I 100% understand your worries and I bet you are worried enough that your poor DD requires surgery let alone not being able to be with her in the ward.

I think that the age limit should be 18 minimum for adult mixed wards, but I do know at our local hospital it must be 16 as there were teens on my mixed ward.

This.

Yeah, that’s because the first world has nicked all the third world’s qualified medical staff.

Most are agreeing with you op there was no need for this bit of bullshit information.

@oobeedoobee 16 year olds are not adults in England. My 16 year old daughter was on a children's ward last year and I stayed with her as she is legally a child.

16 year olds can leave school or education but only if they are on an apprenticeship or traineeship programme. They must remain in education or training until the summer after their 18th birthday.

They cannot vote.

They cannot sign a legal document.

They cannot own land or property.

They cannot be placed in an adult prison if they commit a crime.

They cannot get married, even with their parent's permission.

If they do not attend school their parents can be fined.

They are legally children.

There is no such thing as a single sex surgical ward in the hospital my DD has been in the past. The two surgical wards are mixed sex, but bays are single sex. So insisting on a single sex ward would mean no bed at all.