16 year old in hospital, adult mixed ward.

[Teenangels]

My daughter and I are currently sitting on a chair in the waiting area, to be taken up to a ward, she is 16 only just and been diagnosed with an appendicitis, she has been given morphine, so is sleepy and

I have been told that she will be going up to an adult mixed ward to wait for surgery and that I am not allowed to go up with her.

I am actually furious that my 16 year old will be surrounded by adult men, she is a child how is this allowed to happen.

In my eyes she is still a child, she can't get married (without my permission) but can be treated as a child.

AIBU and over reacting or AINBU to feel she is being totally let down.

It seems to be postcodey. I know 17, 18 and 19 year olds that have needed hospital stays and been given beds in the term ward at our local paediatric hospital. Because it is more appropriate. I am guessing this is a hospital without a children's hospital attached?.

Disgusting. Hope it all goes well and I for one admire you.

My daughter has gone down for her operation, she called me to say she was going down and that she loved me.

I am sat in the car park waiting and will have to call recovery to see what ward she will be transferred to, hopefully then I will be able to see her.

i only said about the men, because I was in hospital a few months ago and found it awful that men, most those that had no idea what was happening were coming into other bays and coming up to beds and nurses had to be called to take them back to their bays. I am a forty something woman not a 16 year old.

All I wanted was to sit and be with my daughter who was scared and in pain.

To all the posters saying she will be fine and I am overreacting I really hope the shoe is not on the other foot as I am sure you will want to be with your young adult.

Thank you to all those that have said that they can understand my feelings.

I hope she's ok and gets moved to a more suitable ward post op.
That must have been really tough, hope all goes well.

Thinking of you both, OP. Hope all is done soon and your DD recovers swiftly.

YANBU OP and some of the responses on this thread are mental.

Your daughter is a minor.

Mixed sex wards are a known risk.

We pay for the NHS. It is OUR service. I'm sick of this mimsy Uriah Heep forelock tugging attitude that you must be grateful for any shitty care and treatment just because of the magical 'NHS'. It's not like we have a reasonable alternative that we would under an insurance system.

I hope her Op goes well.

Mixed sex wards are completely inappropriate and whoever thought them up should hang their head in shame.
I would not want to have left my DC at that age either.

Hope you and DD are both ok there? You certainly have my sympathy X

I couldn't get worked up about this.

Wow that’s difficult. I understand from both sides… I cried having a blood test when I was 16! I would have been totally desperate for my mum to be with me in this situation 😞

She can’t be on a children’s ward as she is an adult, that would make those with children maybe feel uncomfortable.
From being in and out of hospitals the last 5 years it is normal that that is the case, adults go to adult wards. Nurses and HCAs are assigned to every Bay Area.

I’m sure they’re looking after her well and you’ve eaten and are looking after yourself. Keep chatting if it keeps you company. Wishing her a speedy gentle recovery, it’ll be wonderful having her home and healing.

OP, I hope you are not waiting too long to hear that she is in recovery and you are able to join her soon.

I have a 16 year old DS, I would feel the same as you if he was fearful and in pain and going for surgery on his own.

Best wishes

Thinking of you OP and so sorry you can't be with your daughter. I wouldn't be at all happy that my 16 year old was having to deal with a mixed sex ward at an already scary time for her. Whatever their views on the health service and the appropriateness of mixed sex wards, some of the posters on here have clearly had a complete empathy bypass.

Will she be having keyhole surgery?

Sixteen year olds are not adults FFS.

It will be a mixed ward, meaning men at one end and women at the other.

What age would you get worked up about this.
7?
8?
13?

let's hope you never have to sit in a car park and know that your daughter is going down for an operation and wants you to be there.

Sorry, I'm just popping out so really cannot read the thread but when I had an operation at 16 I was on the children's ward. I think that is right, too. It's probably been mentioned but I'd ask her to be in that ward as at least the males that are there are boys.

I really sympathise with you OP as I would be cross about this too as my daughter would feel vulnerable and undignified.

I also feel for the older men as they must be really embarrassed and feel they are losing their dignity in the presence of and in full view of women and young girls .

hospitals really need to improve this area of care

I’m sending you a hug OP.

How barbaric. I am totally with you. This is scary and not right. I wish your DD a speedy recovery and I hope you get to see her tonight.

Consultant surgeon here. I'm so sorry you're going through this, it is completely unacceptable. Where I work 16 year olds do come to adult wards but we would absolutely allow a parent to stay with the child until they went to theatre (and you'd be allowed up to theatre with them). Your daughter will be getting looked after well, please don't worry, but when this is over do complain to PALS so that others don't have to go through the same thing.

I would be upset about this as well OP, the NHS is in a right state. Hope all goes well and your DD is home soon. It’s not nice to imagine a 16 year old girl having to spend the night surrounded by random men!!