To be totally turned off by this?

[teslaplayer]

Went on a first date with a guy I met online last night, went out for dinner. When I got there I definitely found him attractive. However when it came to ordering drinks he ordered himself a glass of milk.

I've honestly never came across someone doing that in a restaurant and I just think it's really odd and really put me off him. I have tried to work out why this was such a turn off and I can't come up with a reason it just made me feel a bit yuck.

AIBU? It's just so odd on a first date I feel.

I think it would depend on the context of the rest of his personality. If he had other childlike or slightly “oddball” characteristics, it would put me off as part of the package.

If he was otherwise engaging and interesting, attractive (to me), etc then I’d probably think it was fine.

You see, back in the days when I was dating, I'd rather the man was honest about who he is and not try to be something he's not or try to 'impress' me. That way, you know who you are getting, not somebody fake, and are not being set up for future disappointments.

And what is 'a bit childish' and 'not very manly' anyway? That's a lot of pressure to conform to stereotypes for men, and the same could be said for women in return. Not very good for self-esteem and mental health.

It's ok to have personal preferences, but hoiking up our judgey pants about other human beings is best avoided, except for the serious stuff.

I think it’s lovely actually. It’s the quirky sort of ‘I don’t care what others think’ that I like in a person.

I don't necessarily think it is unmanly or childish to drink milk. I just said it could be construed as such.

My Number 1 criteria for a date is that they have to be keen on me. I don't think that means being fake, it just means showing your best self. Plenty of time for beer and chips in front of the TV too - but later on down the line.

Was it Leon??

I did ask at the pub & serial killer was mentioned but also indigestion. Then I was asked if it was skimmed, semi-skimmed or full fat. I don't think it really matters. I suppose it is a healthier option than alcohol or fizzy pop.

I still think of Homelander though and a milk drinker would not do it for me.

I'm also put off by adults drinking squash.

I drink squash because I don't like carbonated drinks (no one else seems to get this but they hurt!) and fruit juice is often too acidic for me.

I would be half expecting him to ask for turkey dinosaurs and smiley faces for his main course.

Ha, I wouldn't mind if I could order smiley faces!

It's got to be plant based milk. Otherwise... Bitty 🤮

I'd be more turned off by someone picking at my food choices than a man ordering milk. I once had a guy comment on my food being fattening and suggesting I shouldn't eat it while looking me up and down. I wasn't overweight and even if I was it would still have been controlling and offensive. Saying a man is childish / unattractive for his food choices smacks of the same attitude - I'd be running a mile if I were him.

That said OP I think you're probably just not that keen on him in general, otherwise I don't think it would have mattered so much.

Yes I'd find it weird. But I honestly think I would have just asked him straight out about it: 'Milk is an unusual choice'; 'i've never been for dinner with someone who has ordered milk'. It's a conversation starter at least. Maybe that is what he was hoping for?!

Total and utter psychopath. Have you seen A Clockwork Orange? There’s a whole link here on how villains always drink milk

www.scoopwhoop.com/amp/entertainment/do-onscreen-villains-sociopaths-drink-milk/

To be honest in general I think adults drinking cow lactation (which is meant for calves) is totally weird anyway and makes me want to vom.

You can be turned off by whatever you feel like and you can stop dating someone for whatever reason you want. But that level of being turned off by something at best mildly unusual is a you problem, not a him problem.

Being judgey is a much worse turn-off than drinking milk!

Maybe it was a test?

It would put me off because I would be thinking their breath will smell of sour milk. It's not as deep as people make out. There will be things I do that put men off that's just how it is. We aren't going to be for everyone it's no big deal.

I'd be surprised but it wouldn't put me off. So what if he really likes milk? Did he eat anything with chilli in? Milk stops the burn lol apparently.

If that was all he ever drank full stop then hmmm maybe. I would still meet him again if that was all that was wrong.

If this was after he had eaten could it be for heartburn? i have done this in the past however I usually explain why (even though i shouldnt need to as even I view it as odd) ha ha

Exactly. What the hell is the point in every bloke turning up, drinking tea, a pint of beer or a glass of beer, wine under duress, talking about the football and whatever constitutes manly - the gym? Jason Bourne?? Paying for dinner? for three dates in an effort to impress you with being a totally average manly man only to find out on the fourth date he loves milk with his dinner, goes to Comic Con dressed up every year and prefers curling?

Would you dunno someone for drinking cow milk in their tea on a first date too? Fair enough if so, just send like a double standard for most other people. Cappuccino? Fine. Milk? Omg are you 3?????

This thread is currently being discussed on Steph's Packed Lunch. I'm on plus 1 though, so apologies if this has already been mentioned!

This is hilarious 😂😂😂😂

He would have more common ground with someone like me who orders tea and coffee at wetherspoons. Sorry but it's dirt cheap, tasty and you get free refills!

Can you watch this on catch up later?

@SleepingStandingUp to be fair yes. I haven’t had any cows milk products since my kid was 8 weeks old (cows milk allergy) and I can now smell it on people 🤣🤢. I have also been breastfeeding for pretty much 6 years now so I guess I equate it to that (lactation of a mammal) and it makes me feel a bit icky. I think I’m probably in the minority on that but I think regardless, a date asking for a glass on arrival would make me think he had a kill room at home 🤣🫣

Fair enough, I get that I guess. But I'm guessing OP wouldn't have dumped him in the middle of Costa for ordering a Latte which is what I don't get. It's different but why is that bad?

It doesn’t have to be objectively bad for her not to like it or for her to not fancy him because of it.