To think if someone is four inches taller than you that is not short

[SleepDreamThinkHuge]

in relative terms?

I was talking to a friend who said he met a girl who was 5 feet 2 and he is just over 5 foot 6 she said she liked everything about him, but he is "too short for her."

I told him height is relative. For his height, someone who is between 5 feet to 5 feet 3 it is not really too short because it is still a significant difference. I have heard other stories from friends as well another guy who is about 5 feet 9 and a girl who is 5 feet 3 thinks, he is too short for her. Is it me or if someone is a few inches taller than you at least that should not be classed as short speaking in relative terms?

I am 5'1" and I think maybe he wanted to breed height back in.

I did the same. My x was tall. But now, I would favour a pleasing face over height.

People can be awful to short people so I understand choosing a tall "mate" to correct your shortness!

My friend has a v big nose and she wanted a man with a tiny nose 😅

I’m 5’10” and my first two serious boyfriends were shorter than me. Then I met DH who’s 6’2” and I so much prefer it.

I’m 5’ 2” and I have never found tall men attractive. Any man over 5’ 8” would have been a turn off for me.

What a strange thread, you're not really allowed to police what other people find attractive! And for what it's worth it's unlikely that his height was the only factor in her decision.

I'm 4'11" and have only ever had relationships with 6' plus men. I wanted to give any future offspring the chance of reaching a more run of the mill height and not having to put up with abusive or patronising comments from dickheads for their entire lives. It felt more like a biological imperative to me, rather than not finding shorter men attractive, and it wasn't about feeling protected or surrounded, on the contrary, my preference was gentle bespectacled beanpole types.

However, mission 'average height kids' now accomplished, I would say that a large height difference in a relationship is a very literal pain in the neck, and if I had my time again I would be far more likely to date men who were on the average height side, they tend to be far better dancers too.

Men need to stop dating short women if they aspire to Danish-level heights for their children (lighthearted btw!!)

Men don't think about future children when it comes to attraction and early dating whereas women do.

It's probably why subconsciously short women choose taller men.

I think tall men are attracted to small women for similar reasons.

I’ve asked around, and the most common explanation I get for female height preference is that they like to feel “surrounded.” They want to hug someone bigger than them, lie next to someone large,

Men like to feel like a bear.

Generally confidence makes a man attractive. I've been attracted to a few confident small men throughout my life.

Does it work the other way? I like chubby men but I’m slim myself. Am I also not allowed? I do not enjoy slim men

I know what you mean. I’m 5ft1.5 and don’t really like being loomed over by a tall man. Thinking about it I have a preference for shorter stockier men but that doesn’t mean I couldn’t fancy a tall man if he had a lot of other good qualities.

Height is odd. I'm 5 foot 3 and called tiny ! It's not tiny for a woman!

He is short and isn't going to get a tall woman easily .. sounds like he needs to give his head a wobble. !

She is 5 foot 2 though and he is over 5 foot 6 that is not a tall woman for him in relative terms. In fact, he is significantly taller...

Could I reason you out of any of your preferences?

If she's naturally generally attracted to blue eyed, black haired men but has blond hair and dark brown eyes herself, is she allowed not to be attracted to a grey eyed, brown haired man, or can she not admit that because his eyes are lighter and hair darker than hers?

Dunno, to me seems to me there are enough things to worry about matching up with someone rather than them only being a "mere" 4 inches taller than you.

I mean if they are a nice person, good values and responsibility and presumably you were attracted to them in the first place why would you ditch them just for the sake of getting someone a couple of inches taller.

Maybe just buy them some of those "add 2 inches to your height" shoes.

I was talking to a friend who said he met a girl who was 5 feet 2 and he is just over 5 foot 6 she said she liked everything about him, but he is "too short for her."

Do you fancy this bloke or what?

Taking the arse on his behalf because some woman feels he's too short for her when it doesn't even sound as if the bloke in question is that bothered.

But you can’t help who you’re attracted to. I’m the grand height of 4ft 11” and I like men around 6ft, preferably stocky, with a beard and tattoos.

My friend is 6ft tall and she likes shorter, skinny men who are clean shaven.

Neither of us are wrong.

What’s your actual gripe here, OP?

You seem very protective of this man, and irate at some random woman’s personal preferences.

It doesn’t matter that you think she should think he’s tall enough for her. She doesn’t.

@SleepDreamThinkHuge I have a friend like this and needless to say she is still single. Imo writing someone off based on height when still actually taller than you is a bit closed minded. Mind you she didn’t like a guys socks, jacket and various other reasons before that stopped her having a 2nd date 🙈😂

Anyway, people fall for people who "aren't their type" all the time.

I can see the appeal of very tall men but it never occurred to me to wait around to marry one, quite limiting surely?! Most men aren’t over six foot and even fewer of the ones that are are Anthony Joshua types.

Although this is true, many people (especially young free and single people in no massive hurry to pair up) have various traits they're attracted to which they say and sort of believe are non negotiable.

However if they meet (in "real life", say at work or through friends etc. or in any natural, face to face situation) someone who doesn't match up to those criteria they might very well fall in love and end up with that person naturally over time (or indeed faster with that inexplicable chemistry that sometimes hits despite someone not being "your type").

If the woman in question says that SleepDreamThinkHuge 's friend is to short for her, she means:

1. he's shorter than the type of man she's usually attracted to

2. there was no chemistry leading her to overlook/ not notice this (and perhaps she's assuming there was no attraction because of 1)

3. there's been no gradual getting to know one another and happen to start being attracted to him as a person - because 2) and because if this had happened she wouldn't be being asked to explain why she isn't attracted to him.

Why has she ended up having to justify not being attracted to your friend @SleepDreamThinkHuge ?

I can see where you're coming from. I'd find it a bit odd to have a partner over a foot taller than me but then some women like it. A pity for men under 6ft though who are being ruled out just on height criteria even if they are a great person seems bonkers.

Honestly I dumped a guy because he picked the salami off his pizza in a restaurant on our second date.

I dumped a guy for being ten minutes late and brushing it off without apologising.

I dumped a guy for watching football in the pub instead of talking to me.

I dumped a guy because he wanted to live in Guildford (as in he didn't live there when I met him but for him it was a real non negotiable to settle down there, rather than just that he kind of liked it and had ended up there with no real reason to move).

I'm sure I turned men down or refused a second date for even more frivolous reasons.

I've been married for nearly 20 years.

It's good and right to be choosey.

I'm 5'3" and my exh is 6'. I would def go for a shorter man next time. Think he's put me off tall men for life 🤣

5' 6" is short for a man. Some women don't like short men, even if they're short themselves, which is too bad for your friend. Rather than try to jump through hoops demonstrating he isn't short really, he'd be best trying to find a woman who doesn't mind.