To not understand the nastiness that being a housewife provokes 2

[Alondra]

Apologies for making a second part to this thread but I feel strongly about this issue.

Topgub

Possibly because there aren't any benefits

Few countries have a government system caring about women and children. The majority of our governments don't care if all have to work for a pittance to pay mortgage, bills and food when children are small because average couples need both wages. A system where nursery fees are stratospheric and eating half an average wage, and worse still, because parents working full time, making an average pay to be able to survive, have few serious tax concessions. Those tax concessions go to multinationals.

It's a system that only cares about productivity attached to $. If you are an engineer with projects worth a million dollars, your salary will be minimum 15% of that money annually. If you are a carer or a parent, there is no quoted money attached to your work, so you are in a low wage or no wage at all.

A woman with two kids working full time for an average salary has not gained much from my mother’s time. Working full time, taking care of the kids when they are home and doing the lion share of housework and rarely free time at all.

With housing costs, bills and health systems collapsing, I really fear for women in the next few years. We will get the short straw as we've always done, but it'll be a plus if, at least, we don't turn on each other.

I think you should stop attacking people for posting on whatever threads they like. Sorry if you want your life choices validated but that’s not mumsnet.

its not about sahm either - housewife is what op always wanted to be. That is so regressive and sexist of course it inspires replies. That’s the purpose I think - to be goady.

I can't believe it didn't occur to me before. It all makes sense now. You're the girl in school that can't wait to leave so she can find a man just like daddy to pay for everything whilst she does FA with her time. Her mother was usually equally as lazy and I imagine it goes back generations. Every school had one. Makes total sense.

It makes me feel quite sick that an adult man seeks out a partner to be submissive and meek and so he can stick his chest out and 'provide' whilst she stays at home being well rested for the after-tea sex on tap. Just gross. So little self respect.

I wouldn't want to be anywhere near the type of man who finds that kind of partner attractive. Those kind of men creep me out. Why you'd want a partner who is unable to manage an adult life and just sits around doe eyed relaxing and twirling her hair is beyond me. Something fundamentally wrong there.

Not my fault people are intent on creating drama and being insulting to me. I'm not going to stay silent when people are being rude.

@AMorningstar

What I have said is that people shouldn't treat staying home like its the inferior choice.

Why not?

If that's what they think?

Interesting that both you and @cagliari feel the same about your vies being challenged and disagreed with

Such horror that anyone could possibly disagree with your lifestyle choices.

Screams sheltered life to me.

I hope this career you are so attached to isn't psychoanalysis because like most on here you're absolutely awful at it. 🤣 How was my mum lazy for working part time and doing all the domestic duties in the house? Give your head a wobble.

Also my husband would laugh at anyone describing me as meek or submissive. As would anyone who knows me.

OP, please tell us again that you must be a housewife because you need to be well rested for your husband and answer the door to Amazon. That had me lolling for ages in the last thread.

Are you okay with someone treating working as inferior, if that's what they think?

I think it’s one thing to take a few years out with young kids. It’s quite another to spend your life with no intention of working at all and for your ambition to be being a « housewife » as op claims. That is opting out of life and not being a functional adult - she wanted a daddy for life.

@Autumndays123 - so what? It's not for you or indeed me. Consider yourself lucky that you don't have to wonder as to the respect of others. I think that's the tragedy.

If you are secure in your choice, you don't need others to approve

Did you not describe yourself as extremely introverted unable to handle work, 'any kind' of pressure or basic socialising because it's too much for you? Is that the person who no one would describe as meek 😂

Lol. No wonder op doesn’t like women!

This seems...selfish. You want the rest of us to change our way of doing things to make it better for the minority of women who live to work.

Everyone should be judged on their merits not their gender. But if the majority of women want to do x, you can't complain just because you think it makes it harder for you to do y.

Being introverted and not enjoying a high pressure work environment doesn't make someone meek, lol.

I'm the first person to kick off if necessary and have been described by several as aggressive and hot headed, particularly when I was younger. HILARIOUS that you seem to think I'm some smiling doll eyed girl who won't speak up. It's very much the opposite.

Then you and the other posters shouldn't complain about "offensive" comments towards working mums. 🤷🏻‍♀️

@AMorningstar

I'm OK with them holding that opinion and stating that opinion.

Plenty women do. (But only when it's other women and not their ohs doing the working natch)

Women choosing not towork promotes sexist and outdated attitudes and prevents equal parenting.

Some work out of necessity. Which is different from deriving your lifes purpose from the labour market.

So you think everyone should be forced to split everything 50/50 to promite equality. Urgh. What a lack of regard for individuals

Why is it acceptable when your side does it but nasty if I do it?

Some rather naive comments on here by certain posters
Whether you end up divorced or not or a single parent in other ways (widowed ) can quite often be totally out your control.

Do you think all these posters on mumsnet who ended up with partners having affairs, using hookers, secretive vast amounts of debt, using sex worker webcams etc were all expecting this- ? Most of them believed they were in perfectly happy marriages until the moment they realised they no longer knew their husbands and partners- maybe in the past women put up and shut up in order to keep a home and income and lifestyle- these days not so much so. I remember my grandma telling me she had been very unhappy at times but her options were fewer.

You know full well what i mean. If money wasn't needed most would quit their job tomorrow. Those people work out of necessity not love of the job.