To not understand the nastiness that being a housewife provokes

[AMorningstar]

Not just on MN. I don't even use MN that often but I see this on other social media websites too. If a woman shares something positive about being a housewife it's full of comments about how "being controlled by a man, couldn't be me!" "No thanks, I love my independence" or "just wait until he leaves you, then what". If a woman shares something negative about it its "see, this is why being a housewife is TERRIBLE" (yet no one would say "this is why having a career is terrible!" If a person was complaining about their job)

I saw someone earlier say they'd be devastated if their daughter wanted to be a SAHM.

Why does it provoke such vitriol? Other women choosing this doesn't force anyone else to, I don't get the complete lack of respect for people's decisions and lack of understanding that different people enjoy different things.

How do you know it is the truth?

There isn’t much multitasking, here. Sort of exclusive Mumsnetting.

There's only so many hours in the day. By the very nature of time, you can only give so much if you're giving it elsewhere.

Maybe just a spot of sock puppeting.

If anyone is sock puppeting, it's the anti SAHMs who love to pile on others

Truth doesn’t hurt OP- Sexism, misogyny and the sexual objectification of women is extremely painful.
let me highlight what I heard:
happy relationships = women being sexually available to men.
Being sexually available to men = staying at home so you don’t get too tired out with other non-domestic tasks.

But I'll try to summarise it as less stress and more time to dedicate to the relationship in multiple ways including physically.

you were basically saying that not working frees up more time to watch porn and engage in your various kinks with your hubby.

Working moms still fuck their partners you know 🙄

It was the OP’s mindset about this which made me wonder about the ‘trad wife’ thing, which is essentially a fetishised version of being a housewife.

I said its an advantage. Someone asked why relationships with a SAHP would be happier. I never said it was the sole reason to give up work. It also refers to more time to put an effort into your appearance

I think this is another example of a woman with little empathy or imagination who can't cope with daily life so therefor assumes that no one else can

And the latest comment about appearance reinforces that.

Put it this way, if there was a thread by a woman asking, "Why are people judgemental / nasty about women who work and use childcare? " - I would certainly NOT be on that thread going on and on .,, "Why do you need validation as a WM OP. Why? Why? Are you insecure? Think you're better, do you? What about your husband, eh eh?"

What need would I have to do that?

The appropriate response to that working mum would surely be - "Sorry you have encountered nasty, judgemental people OP, but try to take no notice of them."

That's all anyone needed to say to this OP. But instead, people persistently goad her and then blame her for responding. I see you who are doing it and I'm calling it out. It's very unpleasant and you should be ashamed.

A misogynist is someone who dislikes women. You just said that you generally dislike women.

I'm not upset by it lol. I think it shows the pathetic nature of some other women, which is why I've never liked many of you. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Women should support other women - but if other women insist know being bitter jealous weirdos, they're not going to get my support. Go find another SAHM thread to whinge on

Well, it’s been threatening for 30 odd pages but finally, out pops the cloven hoof.

It also refers to more time to put an effort into your appearance

!!

I got laid into on another thread for putting my head above the parapet and saying I went back to work when my baby was a couple of months old. It happens plenty on here. It didn’t bother me particularly because I’m not insecure in my choices.

It's not misogynistic for someone to want a fulfilling sexual relationship with their husband lol. Women enjoy sex too, shocking I know.

OP, I don't understand the nastiness either.

We all agree that in today's world a housewife or a woman staying at home, whole financially dependent on her husband, can end up in the poverty line because neither the Courts or the government really care.

The problem IMO is that we women, after thousands of years of being less than, have a very low bar when it comes to pushing for serious institutional change that acknowledges the work, benefits, and money saved to taxpayers from staying at home moms raising kids when they are very small.

I was lucky when my oldest was born, I was able to stay home until he started school. With my youngest it was the opposite, I lived the most awful, stressful time I've had in my life. I was able to take a year off from work, but I needed to go back full time because we had a hefty mortgage. My youngest was born with a chronic health condition which meant the nursery kept calling me when he was sick and my work was not happy because he was sick too often. DH got as much leave as he could, but we were in the same dire position. My son was sick, the nursery wanted the parents to take him home and work was not happy about the amount of time we were taking off.

Until the day governments give a reasonable wage to the parent staying home with small children (usually the mother) or have unlimited parental leave when a child is often sick, all we are doing is playing into the hands of a system set up to maximise profits and production and gives a shit about women and children, as it's always been.

Come now @cagliari, see above, the OP is the one being ‘goady’ and has been for the many hours she’s been filling up this thread.

But your husband works full time? So according to your logic I assume he wouldn’t have the energy/ time to physically devote himself to you? So according to your logic happy relationship = women being less tired out by work so she can be sexually energetic.

This @AMorningstar is not a victim of working women's disdain or bullying.

For the first few pages I tried to engage her in a serious conversation about the difference between the warnings many mothers would do well to heed (given their financial vulnerability) and she just wouldn't respond. Later I realised she only responded to posts about how housewives are perceived. THIS is her biggest problem. Perceptions. She's fine, not vulnerable, her father put money in to her house, so even if they split up she'd be fine, but she doesn't care about other women in much more vulnerable situations. She cares about the image of being a housewife and how that's generally perceived.

LOST PATIENCE a few pages in.

@Alondra

that acknowledges the work, benefits, and money saved to taxpayers from staying at home moms raising kids when they are very small

Possibly because there aren't any benefits

But he has less to do than if we both worked, because I deal with the vast majority of domestic stuff during the day. So not comparable.

Herejustforthisone - if you were encountering stupid attitudes on here and felt the need to ask why women are so judgemental about WMs, well that's a perfectly valid question to ask and you should not be hung out to dry for daring to ask it.
Same with the OP.

So to sum up we should all aspire to be housewives so that we can be sexually avaliable to our husbands round the clock and have plenty of time to doll up for them?

Not misogynistic at all OP 🤡