To not understand the nastiness that being a housewife provokes

[AMorningstar]

Not just on MN. I don't even use MN that often but I see this on other social media websites too. If a woman shares something positive about being a housewife it's full of comments about how "being controlled by a man, couldn't be me!" "No thanks, I love my independence" or "just wait until he leaves you, then what". If a woman shares something negative about it its "see, this is why being a housewife is TERRIBLE" (yet no one would say "this is why having a career is terrible!" If a person was complaining about their job)

I saw someone earlier say they'd be devastated if their daughter wanted to be a SAHM.

Why does it provoke such vitriol? Other women choosing this doesn't force anyone else to, I don't get the complete lack of respect for people's decisions and lack of understanding that different people enjoy different things.

I simply shot back with the same level of venom that was directed towards me.

So in your opening post you said this ...

I don't get the complete lack of respect for people's decisions and lack of understanding that different people enjoy different things.

So if you think you deserve respect / understanding for your decisions, then surely you'll have to apply the same to others? Because if not, this comment was very disingenuous.

Tinder, hookup culture, the prevalence of casual sex and unfaithfulness...

I don't think you understand me. I have respect and understanding for others. But if someone makes insulting comments towards me I'll make them back.

Tinder, hookup culture, the prevalence of casual sex and unfaithfulness

Whats any of that got to do with women's working status?

But if someone makes insulting comments towards me I'll make them back.

That's not true at all, you've made plenty of random unprovoked digs on this thread. You can't see this perhaps, but you're ever but as bad as the behaviour you're complaining about.

It's not an accusation ! I have had women tell me they are jealous of my life so in my experience it is true .

Yes she has. This is a fairly disingenuous thread. And immature.

What if you thought you had the perfect man until you get married and then he becomes violent or abusive? You sound really naive and smug.

How do you know that couples that divorce didn't take marriage seriously and try to make it work?

And your porn use is better?

This thread just demonstrates to me that women don’t need men to put them in their place and make them feel bad about themselves, because women are the experts at demeaning and controlling other women.

Yes she has. This is a fairly disingenuous thread. And immature.

I’ve just read her contributions to other threads too.
There is a huge elephant in the room OP has not mentioned here.

Myself and another poster were discussing divorce, marriage and relationships in the context of modern society...

Equating a married couple watching porn to infidelity and a lack of commitment and seriousness in relationships is so disingenuous, holy shit

I don't see staying in an unhappy marriage as positive but I think people choose their partners unwisely, give more attention to the wedding than the marriage and don't put the effort in. This goes for both men and women. Marriage and relationships are seen as disposable
This sort of thing only adds to the impression that you've got a very sheltered view of the world.

It isn't the first time on this thread where you seem to suggest that your choice in a spouse is so much better than most women's because neither of you believe in infidelity and divorce.

If your marital arrangements work for you and your husband then good for you, but I would be cautious about standing in your 20s claiming you're financially independent because you plan on never working and it's ok because your husband lets you spend what you like.

For someone who is content with their arrangement, it seems odd to start a thread conflating housewives with SAHP where you seem quite keen to get validation for your family arrangements.

It's bad form to bring up people's posts on other threads. In any case, you can hardly accuse OP of being over-invested and then go to the lengths of advance searching her and tasking back through god knows what!

Are you saying women are stupid? That we don't have capacity to choose a decent husband? Because that's what it sounds like there.

Naive and smug because I have a happy marriage. God everyone on MN really is miserable.

I'm sure some did. But the very high divorce rates suggest somwthing is amiss. I don't think stress helps.

@FlamencoDance or is women having financial independence allowing them
more choice and can walk away from a potentially bad/abusive marriage increased divorce rates? Low divorce rates years ago was not necessarily a good thing.

Surely everyone thinks their choice in spouse is the best, hence them marrying them lol.

Right?! Very weird behaviour to bring up comments I made on an adult thread here, a non sexual thread.

I should also add - if the OP decides to start a thread, she can engage with it as much or as little as she chooses. That's true for anyone in any thread.

SAHM / housewife threads always very quickly run to 1000 posts anyway. Read into that what you may. Usually, it's a core group of posters who ensure this is the case. Only they know why.

This. If something goes wrong with your relationship, or god forbid your partner/husband dies, a job can be a lifeline in more ways than the purely financial.

😂😂 agree , I have more money than my husband !

Also confused what the elephant in the room is re my other threads. That I like York Christmas Market? That I said someone's partners lack of communication was a problem? Truly heinous crimes. 😂