To want my housemate’s girlfriend to pay for basically living in our house?

[summerclocks]

I live in a shared house with 3 other people. One of them has got a new girlfriend who basically lives in our house now. They have been together for about two months and she spends at least 5-6 days a week in our house.

We really didn’t have an issue with this but she’s starting to become a problem. The house has 3 allocated parking spaces for the 3 people in our house with cars. She always parks in whatever space is empty when she comes around, not just her boyfriend’s but also mine or my other housemates. I work until late and it’s very annoying to have to come home to fight for my parking space. When none of our spaces are available she takes up our neighbours! We have asked her to stop but she doesn’t.

She is very careless with her use of water and electricity when she’s around. She works from home so when her bf is out she’ll stay here all day like it’s her house, has up to 2 baths a day and usually uses the oven for meals and leaves all lights on. She does all her washing here and even has friends over when her bf is not around like this is her house.

We have a smart meter and have definitely seen an increase in our electricity and gas use since she started living here. It is very frustrating that she’s almost moved in and having all this for free.

I am just exhausted of having to put up with someone that doesn’t even live here or even contributes to this house yet causes all of our problems!

Ridiculous. How does any of that help the OP?... A dog?

You need a house meeting, establish what is fair in terms of overnight visitors, how many nights per week, no keys cut for visitors, no visitors staying at home during the day and money from your housemate to cover the increase in the bills.

The gf could be lovely but it's not the point. Her being there changes the dynamic and atmosphere. It's awful and needs to stop.

This. It is absolutely unacceptable.

Normal tenancy rules are either 2 days a week or 14 days in 6 weeks. If it were me, each time I get home and my paid for parking space was in use by her, I'd be texting your housemate telling them that there is a car parked in your space and it needs moving.
Also she has no right to be there when your housemate isn't and is being a CF by taking 2 baths a day. Remember your argument is not with her, but with your housemate.

I would check your tenancy agreement to see if there is anything about being able to push her out of a window...

I'd probably do a 'Sheldon'; " Knock knock knock, Mary. Knock knock knock, Mary. Knock knock knock, Mary" but keep it up ad infinitum until she can't stand it and opens the door. Then I'd escort her out. Or quietly cut the power and catch her when she comes out to see what's up. Or just fucking barge in (assuming there's no lock) and stand there until she left. No more Mr/Ms Nice Guy with her.

If nothing else, have a housemate's meeting and tell him that she is his 'guest' therefore the rent will now be divided in 5 ways with him paying 2/5s to equalize the additional utility usage as his 'she uses my share of the utilities when I'm not there' is bollocks.

I've never lived in shared housing, but I've been the GF. And if my BF left, then I left too unless it had been cleared with the housemates for me to stay.

Can't believe this. Awful behaviour from them. This is the worst example I have seen on here of a housemate's partner's behaviour.

You need to put a stop to this asap. Whether you are more direct with him and tell him this needs to stop or you speak to the landlord, you can't carry on like this.

There is also the implied insurance costs, the landlord needs to be informed (technically it's actually a permissive request)... The landlord's insurance will nt cover her as a tenant, it would cover her as a guest of a tenant for a limited period of time.

Its with them both, lets not give her a free pass with this.

Exactly, knock on their bedroom door when her car is there and have it out with both of them.

I'm a landlord. A very good one, who is lax about most things but this isn't ok.

No credit checks, references, etc. She's freeloading & it won't be her 1st rodeo...

Knock on the room and tell them then , suggest your other flatmate maybe looks for a place with his girlfriend or starts paying her share
They only get the one car park space though and itw between them who parks jn it

I lived in a shared flat (3 women) as a young teacher in London - it was a HA property with cheap rent but electricity was on a coin meter. We had a kitty that lived in the kitchen and all put the same amount of 50ps into it regularly.

Then, one of the other 2 got a boyfriend who was a divorcee with 4 young kids, with access every weekend. I don't know where he lived during the week, but every bloody weekend he came and stayed Friday evening to Sunday evening with her AND brought the 4 kids.

She would cook massive, roast dinners (bear in mind, we were all early 20s women eating quickly prepared meals as a rule), he and the kids would take baths (in his case, very long, very hot baths) and as a result, the electricity usage doubled. Obviously, my (and the other sharer's) access to the bathroom and kitchen became an issue too.

We put up with this for about 6 weeks and when it became clear this was a regular fixture, sat our flatmate down - having taken advice from the HA first - and told her she was breaking the terms of the lease by bringing not just one but FIVE guests to stay on a regular basis.The visits ceased and she moved out a while after.

It isn't all down to the flatmate , I;m sure he isn't forcing her to stay / bathe twice daily and use your WM.

If her washing is on, I'd be so tempted to move the cycle on, halt it , put on a spin/drain and remove it half done and covered in undissolved powder . Stick it in a laundry bag .
Actally my fingers would be itching to turn the temperature to Boil Wash but I'd resist .

Definately go back into the kitchen when she thinks you've gone to your room,
I'll wager she helps herself to whatever she needs in the kitchen (I have lived in shared houses before too)

I'd also mention to landlord about her having her friends over when he's not. So he can really see what she's like.

U need rules. If tenant isn't in house ghen their partner can't be there.

I had one like this years ago. I had very little money and my flatmates argument was that her bf was paying rent somewhere else so he couldn't contribute when he was with us at least 5 days a week. As if that had anything to do with me. Her next flatmate told them both straight and the relationship ended.

I still know the bf. As much as I like him he had form for this and continues to do so to this day. I bet this woman had form.

I would tell both of them this stops now. Every time she parks in one of the spots you tell her to move to a carpark. Every time she does laundry fish it out and chuck in his room. Interrupt any cooking. Make it uncomfortable.

It is your home not hers.

I'd be tempted to get a wheel lock and put it on when she parks in one of house spaces and deny all knowledge

Can you turn the electric off at the meter when you all go out

Minnie the Moocher needs a little word in her ear. Before you throw her out on it.

This happened to me once - it was my BF. After a month I tried to get him out - he pleaded it was a just-till-the-weekend thing, only temporary.

Six weeks on my flatmate sat him down in the kitchen, dumped my BF on my behalf and booted him and his belongings out. I love her still for it.

It turned out the cheeky fucker had given up his flatshare cos his dad wanted to start a business and they’d budgeted his rent money for its expenses. The eviction tale of woe I’d heard was a lie.

Minnie might say she hasn’t anywhere to go but I bet she can think of somewhere when you tackle her.

Which you will.

What about the freezer and the fridge??

Good point. How about uplifting the wifi router and turning off the heating?

Oh bloody hell, please stop telling Op to negotiate sharing costs. This person isn't on the tenancy agreement and the other two tenants don't want her there. The only meeting is to tell him she can only be there when he is or you will get the landlord involved.

Changethe Wi-Fi password.(or just unplug it in the middle of her working from home)

Tell your flatmate no. She leaves when he does. She does not park in your spaces. She does not do her washing in your flat. She does not WFH from your home.

Once they are both informed, enforce. Inform your landlord. End her washing cycle and empty her washing onto the floor. If you catch her using the oven, turn it off, take the food out, bin it. If she is home when he is not, open his door. Keep knocking on it if she closes it.

You are making it very comfortable for her and cf flatmate.

Yes she is being a CF and your housemate is just minimising the negative impact she's having to yours and your neighbours living arrangements. I mean they've only been going out for a couple of months! They are both taking the piss

Check tenancy agreement
Definitely house meeting
Definitely with your other housemate have a firm list of non-negotiables e.g.
*She doesn't park in yours or your neighbours' parking spaces - ever - even if they are vacant
*She isn't in the house when he's not there
*She doesn't do her washing there........