Am I stingy? Boyfriend says i am?

[llpoolj]

My boyfriend lives with me.
He earns £700 more than me a month.
He is always "skint"
He said he needed £20 for his phone.
So I said "il take it out of my savings account,just give me it on Monday when you get paid"
So then today he borrows another £10 and says so that's £310 I owe you Monday (£300 half of rent and bills )
I say no £330 ...£20 for phone too
He said "really ,your going to take that off me"
"I only topped up because you wanted me too"
(He didn't -he told me he needed to top up"
So he says "you know I would give you my last"
I said I buy you so much
I spent £10 buying him McDonald's today,I bought the food all week
I spent £170 last week on concert tickets for his birthday -then 2 hoodies for his birthday.
I reminded him of this and he says "no you can't class the tickets for my birthday -you wanted to go too"
I also bought us Xmas pjs for £30 two days ago

So how does he have the audacity to say I'm tight?
I just wanted it back to in my savings.
I'm feeling shitty and horrible now
I'm honestly not tight -I just don't want to get the mick took out of me

We go on holiday in two weeks
I've bought the sun tan lotion,after sun,case straps ,case locks ,luggage tags ,case scales,I bought him shorts for holiday and 2 tees and god knows what else

😂😂😂🤣😭

You poor dear . Don’t let the fucker know you have any money … open another account and hide extra in there .
then try find a nicer partner

He’s a user. Might be worth kicking him to the curb

Riiight ...
He calls you stingy to guilt you into forking out even more cash on him.

How much do you depend on his £300 contribution to your household costs - could you manage without him?

Because it sounds like you might well be spending £3 - 4K a year on buying him treats, paying for all the food shopping & being generally ripped off for small cash donations on the regular.

So then today he borrows another £10 and says so that's £310 I owe you Monday (£300 half of rent and bills )
I say no £330 ...£20 for phone too
He said "really ,your going to take that off me"
"I only topped up because you wanted me too"
(He didn't -he told me he needed to top up"
So he says "you know I would give you my last"
But he doesn't give you his last.
He doesn't give you anything.
He actively conspires to rip you off.

He is saying they don't class as a birthday gift because I'm getting the second ticket as I also like the band so I'm going with him
Ugh.
Ungrateful, grabby, selfish little user of a man.
How can you bring yourself to sleep with him?

He’s taking you for a ride.

When you have to strategise getting someone to repay you by emphasising which account it came out of, you are on a hiding to nothing.

This man sees you as a cash cow.
When are you going to dump him?

What adult still tops up a phone, especially one who earns a lot?!

Fuck this…. No way! The moment he called me tight I would simply laugh and walk away whilst saying ‘takes one to know one’. Tell him as his ticket isn’t a present he can pay for it, or, you’ll take a friend who
will… unless, of course, he changes his mind!

Take all items you have bought back
and get refunded. What he doesn’t appreciate he doesn’t deserve!

Next time he asks for cash say ‘oh shit, I was going to ask you as I am brassic too’ oh well, cheap end to the month for both of us.

Next time he comments on your new clothes, or whatever, the terminology is ‘why thank you…’ walk away. He says he hasn’t got anything new you tell him there is plenty in the shops, he’s just gotta buy them!

Guarantee you though, the moment you do the above he will be off!!! His cash machine has dried up….

Not read full thread so shoot me.

but sounds like a clock lodger but in the interest of fairness it depends on how the other bills are split.

but that said people with this attitude turn me right off.

You are not stingy one bit, he actually is a very tight guy.

He should normally be taking care of you but you are the one doing that when he even earns more than yourself.

I do not think you have found yourself love at all, if he loves you, then all these will not be happening.

I hope you find someone who really loves you and who you will care for.

Cocklodger. Get rid and find someone that doesn't use you.

Don't complain if and when you do get married
You know what his like .

OP definitely isn’t coming back

Why on Earth are you with this giant man baby?

why are you with him?

he earns more than you and sponges off you and makes you feel guilty for buying yourself clothes.

is he really amazing in bed or something?

why are you paying for everything for him?

take a friend to the concert and tell him to move out.

Why do adult women infantalise adult men. Doing everything for them then complaining
you do his holiday shopping, lend him money. You’re a fucking doormat. Waken up
stop doing all his tasks or you’ll turn into a mn woman who shops for her man,buys his clothes. you'll be that woman the one who dates a man baby
if or when you have kids he'll be just as useless. Except you’ll be stuck with a baby and a man baby. Don’t settle for this crap

Every day you're with him you're making a choice to stay with him. Make better choices.

🤣 have to agree.

Have you thought about having a joint "spending money" account ?

I hope you kept the receipt for those Xmas PJs!

Oh girl!! You’re royally being taken advantage of!

Why? Op isn’t responsible for an adult man managing his monies
I don’t think monies should be joint just because your dating esp as he’s financially incompetent

His concert ticket is still a present from you. Otherwise you'd each pay for your own. He sounds like waste of space, TBH.

You know those women who send money to men in Nigeria or similar? This is really know better. You are not his bank and you really need him to grow up and manage his finances if you want a future together. Alarm bells are also ringing as to where that £700 is going each month. Just say "Sorry babe/love/darling, I'm a bit skint/short myself this week as I had a bill to pay/got my nails done/did a big shop". Stop getting money out of your bank account and make sure you get it back. You could also say you're skint/short because he owes you x amount...