To ask you to admit doing the annoying things people on MN complain about?

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For an anonymous internet forum, it continually strikes me as odd that people very rarely admit to engaging in the problematic or annoying behaviours complained about on here - it's always someone else doing it, apparently. Whether it's hogging the middle lane on the motorway, having kids who are out of control in public places, being a noisy neighbour or not picking up dog poo, people on MN constantly complain about these things happening around them but if no one on here admits to doing it, who are all these offenders? For example, several people in my neighbourhood are leaving their dog's poo around constantly, but when this is brought up on here every single dog owner loudly exclaims that it it's these dog owners who give them a bad name, that they never go out walking without carrying several bags for good measure! Same with bad driving - people on here love calling out driving pet peeves, but surely at least some people on here are engaging in those very same behaviours e.g. tailgating, driving too slowly or bad parking, that everyone complains about?

Are people on here just squeaky clean or in denial? I admit it, I do hog the middle lane sometimes, there you go 😬

I know, so pathetic

But, the strange workings of some people’s minds is just getting interesting and illuminating.

I didn't say conjure, I said commandeer. Read it.

You have no right to claim additional space on public transport that you haven't paid for to try to manipulate where people sit, even if you "want" to. It doesn't matter a jot if you "mind" or not. You're on public transport, it's an available seat, people can take it. Suck it up, travel by car or stay home.

…and yet here you are Lydia, enthusiastically contributing yet more goady posts to those you have already made on this goady thread. The hypocrisy is strong in this one….

It's not a specific annoying action, but I don't drive, which some people on MN seem to think is a terrible crime, and a refusal to take on adult responsibilities. It is due to disabilities, but not of a sort that are always immediately obvious.

Apart from that, I sometimes blow my nose in public, and I am a slow walker.

Vegan homeschooler. Sorry.

Ok dear.

in what way is it goady? I just find it amusing that bus seats have envied such a strong reaction

I can drive and really enjoyed it when I did and sometimes still do in hire cars but I don't drive much any more because I don't need a car where I live. My decision is me taking adult responsibilities by thinking about pollution and the big savings to my family finances.

It's sometimes hard to explain to car drivers that I am not a social failure and even harder to stop some of them insisting on giving me lifts when I am happy to meet them by public transport. Many drivers think public transport is inconvenient, dirty, dangerous and something only teenagers should do when in fact it is not;.They think they are doing me a favour when they are not. I have submitted to lifts because sometimes it's not worth arguing because you get into the territory of suggesting you don't want to be with them. I know that they think of me as imposing on them when in fact it's the other way round.

Good, solid answer!

@ReneBumsWombats i don’t owe solid answers to stupid posts. It’s a thread about admitting poor behaviour. I’m not trying to justify anything.

If there are free seats sit in them. Put your bag on the empty seat next to you if there is one. If there are no free seats say: "I would like to sit there." It is odd when there are other seats to sit next to someone because it gives you a little thrill which I why I would say no and mean it. It is also odd to be too timid to ask someone to make space for you when you need it and there isn't any other choice. Finally, other people really don't notice you that much. I know that but it appears some people don't.

I don't think so.
When I use public transport I sit where I please. Ideally in a front facing free double. If that's not available I'll chose from what is.
If that happens to be a seat with someone's bag on it, too bad.
Tbh until I read this I'd assumed that people put their bags on seats because they were empty and were just being thoughtless. I naively didn't realise it was a ploy used by people who think they somehow deserve a double seat to themselves. But thanks for the heads up. I shall now make it my business to target those seats. I'm sure no one particularly WANTS me next to them, so I might as inflict myself on the entitled selfish people who deserve it!

You always obsessed with this idea that people want to sit by you because you are so sexy and it gives them a "thrill". This despite claiming not to be able bodied enough to move to other seats. So presumably you have sometimes had to sit next to someone since you couldn't get to another space, or you block accessible seats next to you.

I don't know how we can really reason with a person who assumes that people choose their bus or train seats based on their deviant sexual desire for her and the "thrill" it gives them. Let's just say: it is a public space and you do not have the right to commandeer extra seats to try to control what other people do. If people are getting all hot and bothered by the sheer sexual thrill of being in your vicinity, lucky them and lucky you. Just move your sodding bag when asked or I'll move it for you.

I agree

@5128gap and I would say no if there were other seats available to you. What would you do?

You don't give solid answers no matter what the posts are like. But you go on claiming you're only here for the lulz. The mirth and merriment radiates from you! As will your bag when I ask you to move it.

You said earlier that you WOULD move it. After claiming you would refund or make a weird sexual remark. Which is it?

For me personally, I'd just move your bag myself and sit down.

Ok, whatever, I can’t imagine I will EVER see you on a bus but a girl can dream 😂

What is a lulz?

Possibly, you say you don't often use public transport. I do, it's better for the environment.

Makes no difference to me since I'll just move your bag if you won't, despite what you "want" and "mind" relating to a public seat that you're not occupying. We both know you'll move it when asked, though.

How will you know it’s me?

@ReneBumsWombats A thrill isn't always sexual. We do things because we enjoy doing them that doesn't have to include sex. That might include sitting next to someone on public transport because you want to teach them a lesson about what you think is good behaviour even though there is somewhere else to sit because it makes you feel good to impose your values on other people.

I generally avoid teaching people lessons about what I think they should or should not do because I don't get my thrills that way and this thread aside, i don't live for pointless confrontation when there is an easier way. Perhaps you don't either but it's clear that some people here think it's acceptable for them to be like the Judge Dredd of the Victoria :Line and will be thrilled by the idea of imposing themselves when they don't need to but because they want to.

I'm not obsessed with controlling what other people do. I put my bag on the seat next to me if I can because the floor is dirty and don't want to crease my clothes. It has a creep-repellant purpose but that is only secondary. In crowded situations will move it if asked (sometimes I do it before but don't scan the carriage like a meerkat) unless I think the person is creepy or a wanting to make a point. Then I will say no.

Those are good reasons. What is your reason for wanting to sit next to a particular person when there are other easily accessible seats available?

You'll be arguing with everyone on the bus while claiming they're the ones who are over-invested but you're just in it because it amuses you so much. Obviously.

My God, I don't want to know about your thrills. If you really want me to get far, far away from your hallowed seat, start yapping on about that. You'll get an exclusion zone around you the size of Bolivia.

Your story is changing form more often than Dr Who. Now it's actually about your clothes and dirty floors. As if that's any better reason to act like an entitled, antisocial dick on public transport.

You don't own the space next to you and we all know you'll move the bag if asked because everyone does.

I admire your perseverance ReneBumsWombats, as well as your user name. I also wholeheartedly agree with the points you have made. I think we might as well save our breath though - this argument will never be won online… the bizarre argument that passengers are seeking to satisfy their lust by the enormous thrill of sitting next to some woman on the no68 to Clapham will be repeated ad infinitum, together with lolz at how lame people are to be respectful of others on public transport.

No matter though. As you said upthread, we all know what would happen in real life as opposed to online fantasy - the posters would move their bags when asked and then sit in silent anger that someone has had the audacity to sit beside them. Either that, or the bag would be moved for them and once again they would say nothing. Can you imagine the reaction of other passengers if they refused to shift their bag on the basis that they were too sexy for anyone to sit beside?! It really would be lolz all round on the bus in that case.