Parenting with an obese partner - exhausted

[user1471462428]

I know I’m going to get flamed but AIBU for finding it hard to co parent with a obese person. He can’t go on rides or inflatables as he is over the weight limit. He can’t play football/netball with our kids as he is breathless and has no energy. His days are oriented round food and when he can next sleep (he struggles exhaustion I guess due to moving around with his weight). I’m so tired of being the active parent and feeling like I’m dragging him about. I’ve talked to him about diet/bariatric surgery but he is not ready for this. Im sometimes scared he’ll die in sleep and the kids will find him.
I do recognise he is now at the stage where he is essentially disabled but I’m just so fucking tired of him. I do recognise he is ill and the obsessive eating is a compulsion but I’m running out of sympathy with it. Is awful to leave him?

*I don't think it is because his level of obesity does not normally render a person unable to do anything around the house.

Much more to it than obesity.*

Exactly this. The obesity is a red herring. My DH is much heavier than OP DH (also taking into account height with weight), yet he does a community volunteer thing that involves walking a total of 5-7km over 8-10hrs one day every weekend. Sure, he is absolutely buggered when he gets home that day and puts his feet up, but the other 6 days a week he pitches in and his weight didn’t seem to stop him doing household chores/yard work etc.

I’m also far more obese than OP’s husband myself taking height/weight into account and I manage domestic life just fine. Never stopped me with kids, but admittedly I wouldn’t be able to go on that inflatable thing she posted, nor would DH, but our kids always went on bouncy castles when young. Must be odd here as no parents ever went on and they were generally separated by kids ages/times etc and parents stood minding shoes! Quite recently I beat a group of slim young people (I am both obese and old), on a 2km walk where we had a strict time limit so had to be a real power walk. Admittedly nearly killed myself as was not going to be beaten by a group of young whippersnappers but I not only made it but beat them all and a few of them dropped out and had to be picked up along the course. 30mins later I had recovered and could quite happily walk/talk normally again😁. So, again it’s not OP’s DH’s weight that’s the issue, it’s either another health problem or pure laziness.

The symptoms you describe suggest your husband is suffering from depression.

The symptoms the OP describes (in subsequent posts and other threads) suggest her husband is an abusive, misogynistic, terrible human.