To wonder if I should report parent sitting in car with nursery child.

[wellstopdoingitthen]

I live opposite a primary school. There's a mum who collects her nursery child at 11.30 then sits in the car with her until the older children finish at 3pm. She usually sits there with the engine running which is right next to the playground. I'm not sure if I should do anything or if I'm being a busy body.
I know the little one is in there because I did ask the mum to turn off her engine during the really hot weather. I got an earful because apparently she needed it on because it was hot in the car.
Yabu- keep your nose out
Yanbu- you should notify the school/authorities

Play daft and go and her if she broken down? See if she’s ok. Everyone gets so fixated on “reporting” people. We could all just be a little kinder to each other sounds like she needs a little support x

Absolutely!

The Royal College of Physicians estimate 40,000 deaths a year in the UK are linked to air pollution, with engine idling contributing to this.

The Government is working to address the issue as a whole, but what can you do to help the situation?

Cutting out engine idling will help for a start - not only will it improve air quality in congested areas but it is also a potentially fine-able offence.

www.rac.co.uk/drive/advice/emissions/idling/

Perhaps they are homeless or in emergency accommodation that they have to be out of in the day time. Maybe their home is not a place of safety and refuge but a place of fear and abuse and this is their way of staying safe. Have some compassion or butt out or ask them i. For a coffee and a chat.

Its odd behaviour. But not sinister behaviour. My one year old would get home from morning sessions, have some
lunch and then sleep for two hours. And it was a bloody pain if they were still asleep at pick up time for the eldest. I hated having to get them out of their bed for the walk to
school. I can see how someone might decide to stay in the car for all
of nap time .

There may well be a reason she cannot go home. The pollution is an issue, especially for young child inside a car. Perhaps the school could help in some way. As others have mentioned, if you feel you concerned, which you obviously do, err on the side of caution as it may be a safeguarding scenario and have a word with the school. Or if you felt you could offer some good will gesture, offer her a coffee and maybe she will open up about her situation.

I live near a hospital and a while ago a woman parked up on a main road at 8am to go to work for the day, she has an easy to spot car with the gaffer taped convertible roof and streamers tied to the wing mirrors so I knew her car didn't leave until about 4pm, and saw her exit the car to go to work leaving a huge alsation sat in the car!!

Let the school know. They should be able to do something or advise. If they don’t, then use. Tell someone.

Maybe she’s escaping something. You have no idea what people are going through. Maybe that is the safest option for the child🤷🏻‍♀️

For all those saying she maybe escaping something that is the whole point of talking to school

It’s everyone’s business if there’s a concern about a child. That poor kid. Why would you collect your child at 11.30 and then sit in the car until school finishing time?!

I would pop into the school and mention it to someone there. Maybe they could pass it on to a staff member at the preschool as a concern. The preschool or school might choose to speak to the parent. It might be a sign of a wider problem.

You have asked once.

Not the schools issue in my opinion. Social services perhaps if you think it could be because of escaping from a bad situation and in need of help. Or maybe the non-emergency police number.

Anyone who has done a safeguarding course will know that incidents have happened because people weren’t able to see the big picture of what was going in.
If you ever have a safeguarding concern it might be nothing but it might also be the key in bring the big picture together.

You could mention to school as a concern for them

This is one of those threads that highlights why some people should shut their mouths.

Who talks like this in real life?
Horrible way to talk

You need evidence to report it as she can just deny any allegations you make

If they tell school they aren’t going to question her like the police. I think some people are really hung up about the word ‘report’ and think the police or social services are going to be involved immediately.

If my DS turned up at Primary school in pristine uniform and clean hair etc every day and one day turned up very scruffy and unkempt, it is likely that teacher/TA would have a little word with him and depending on answer chat to me too, and conversation would be noted on safeguarding system. It could be something like washing machine broken and waiting for it to be fixed - no further action. It could be because dad had thrown us out of the house after an argument - school may need to take action , get other agencies involved, signpost support. It is the little things that can add up

Could you go out and speak to her, invite her in for a coffee, be friendly?

Many apologies for taking so long to reply. Thank you for the many suggestions. I will try to answer some of the questions that have come up.
No I don't sit watching out of my window all day but when there's someone parked up every day for so long it becomes obvious.
Many parents do come early to grab a parking spot but she is there from about 11.15 every day & doesn't leave until 3.15 when the main school finishes. I had noticed over a period of time that the same car was there. A neighbour had also asked if I had noticed the car & the child getting in every day. I had asked the driver to switch off her engine when I walked past one afternoon. It was then I realised that the child was inside. She's 2or3 & was playing on a mobile phone. I asked if she wouldn't mind switching her engine off as she was parked next to the nursery playground (you can hear the children playing the other side of the fence). There is a large park about 10 mins walk away & a library 5 mins. The reply was so aggressive I backed off. Yes I'm a coward & hate confrontation.
I'm genuinely concerned about the child (&mum). I now feel awful for not doing anything earlier. As it's half term this week I will just mention it to the nursery on Monday.

Ask if you can speak to the safeguarding lead when talking to the nursery @wellstopdoingitthen

@Hungrycaterpillarsmummy taking issue with that comment and not the horrifying volume of people saying this isn’t an issue says it all.

People can have different opinions. Comments can be made in disagreement but it doesn't have to be in an aggressive and hostile way.

@Hungrycaterpillarsmummy so you’re tone policing. No thanks.

But so many posters experienced in safeguarding have explained why it is important to report something like this, it is difficult to see why other posters are still saying MYOB. It’s not like having a different opinion on whether the red dress looks better than the blue dress. This could be a child’s welfare at stake.