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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Won’t let DH keep shoes on entry shoe rack

327 replies

Sundaya · 14/10/2022 19:18

Yes, there is a shoe rack in my house’s entryway, but I would prefer to only keep one pair of shoes per person there. I begrudgingly let DH keep two of his pairs there. He says it’s inefficient to not fill the rack completely and wants to keep more there. But the entryway is not a closet! AIBU?

OP posts:
FleeUpFreeTime · 16/10/2022 10:18

You are controlling and I am petty and if I were your dh I’d be leaving all my shoes on the floor near the shoe rack just to piss you off

Bleachmycloths · 16/10/2022 10:27

saraclara · 16/10/2022 10:02

Okay. Then explain to me where in OP's posts there's anything that says that he's preventing anyone else using the shoe rack.
A shoe rack exists for a practical reason. To have one's shoes/storage for them to hand when you leave or enter the house. There is nothing selfish or entitled about having more than one pair there, as we all have more than one type of footwear that we use regularly.

OP is the entitled one here, who's dictating his use of the shoe rack because she wants it to look nice rather than be useful.

Show quote history

😂

Toomuchtrouble4me · 16/10/2022 10:31

Notjustanymum · 16/10/2022 07:54

I’ve heard that if you are visited by the Police (E.g. if you have reported a crime), the first things they notice are coats hanging on the stair post and too many shoes in the hallway. These apparently indicate a “less-than decent” household🤷🏼‍♀️
Don’t know if it’s true (but assume others judge, too, on this first impression), so when we reorganised the house (during lockdown) I moved a wardrobe and several shoe cabinets to the utility room and placed one slightly smarter slimline shoe cabinet on the hallway wall. Each family member has one section in this, which can store up to 4 pairs, but out of sight, and all additional shoes have to be stored in the utility along with all coats.
I prefer this to shoes being on display, and love my decluttered hallway…

I don’t know about the police but I too can’t stand porch and hallway clutter, and your solution sounds perfect. Our coats hang in utility cupboard too - coats on banisters are a no-no. How people put ALL their shoes on a rack in the hall I don’t know, a rough estimate would mean 60 pairs for us.
the entrance rack is for slippers to be changed into upon entry, shoes when dry and clean, get put away upstairs. Simples. And clutter free.

celticprincess · 16/10/2022 10:51

Oh gosh. Never come to
my house. Our shoe rack on entry is over crowded. They’re there for east access. School shoes, trainers, work shoes for me -
Different pairs for different days, walking boots, wellies, sliders, boots. We don’t keep shoes upstairs. Although some of the rarely worn shoes might actually be upstairs.

Johnnysgirl · 16/10/2022 11:13

Oh sweet Christ... Ungainly shoe storage as a measure of a households decency level. 🤯

Delectable · 16/10/2022 11:26

Notjustanymum · 16/10/2022 07:54

I’ve heard that if you are visited by the Police (E.g. if you have reported a crime), the first things they notice are coats hanging on the stair post and too many shoes in the hallway. These apparently indicate a “less-than decent” household🤷🏼‍♀️
Don’t know if it’s true (but assume others judge, too, on this first impression), so when we reorganised the house (during lockdown) I moved a wardrobe and several shoe cabinets to the utility room and placed one slightly smarter slimline shoe cabinet on the hallway wall. Each family member has one section in this, which can store up to 4 pairs, but out of sight, and all additional shoes have to be stored in the utility along with all coats.
I prefer this to shoes being on display, and love my decluttered hallway…

Lovely! Well done. Having an organised home is not only welcoming but helps one think better, be more peaceful and have generally better mental well being.
Many people with mental health issues start off not tidying their environment leading to an unkempt home which makes it harder to have people over so they have less real life friends.
In the military keeping your area tidy and organised is important for a focused and productive mind. We'll done. 💐🎁🥂🎉🎊💐

Rosey63 · 16/10/2022 12:20

www.ikea.com/gb/en/cat/shoe-cabinets-10456/
A tidy solution? Out of sight is out of mind, win-win all round 🤗

petmad · 16/10/2022 12:33

both compromise the shoes you where the most go on the rack any others tidyly upstairs i own 1 pair of shoes, 1 pair boots and 1 pair motorbike boots witch are upstairs in the spare room and slippers yeah i know odd for a women lol i dont even own an hairdryer and no makeup so minamalist for me i prefer natural or smart but casual now my youngest could open a hair, makeup, shoe shop but shes young and im 50 plus so need for it and my wardrobe is a single size lol

liveforsummer · 16/10/2022 13:05

Notjustanymum · 16/10/2022 07:54

I’ve heard that if you are visited by the Police (E.g. if you have reported a crime), the first things they notice are coats hanging on the stair post and too many shoes in the hallway. These apparently indicate a “less-than decent” household🤷🏼‍♀️
Don’t know if it’s true (but assume others judge, too, on this first impression), so when we reorganised the house (during lockdown) I moved a wardrobe and several shoe cabinets to the utility room and placed one slightly smarter slimline shoe cabinet on the hallway wall. Each family member has one section in this, which can store up to 4 pairs, but out of sight, and all additional shoes have to be stored in the utility along with all coats.
I prefer this to shoes being on display, and love my decluttered hallway…

Jeez 🤣. This thread just gets better!

threatmatrix · 16/10/2022 13:13

I totally agree, let him have his way and not only will the rack be full but all around it will be as well. Been there done it, got rid of it.

OldEnoughToHaveReadBunty · 16/10/2022 13:18

Well the Police would love my house then 😂.

Shoes & coats everywhere. I'd be delighted if people stuck to using the shoe racks!

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 16/10/2022 13:20

Lol about police considering you to be less than decent 🤣 does that mean you’re not allowed to be a victim of a crime?

Johnnysgirl · 16/10/2022 13:21

Many people with mental health issues start off not tidying their environment leading to an unkempt home which makes it harder to have people over so they have less real life friends.
Where is this coming from? Hmm
We started off talking about op's dh putting an extra pair of shoes in the shoe rack, where there was space to accommodate them.
Stop projecting your own issues, fgs Confused. Or deal with them.

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 16/10/2022 13:28

Our rack has 5 shelves, there are 5 of us..

We can fill our shelves as much as we want, no overflow allowed 😁

Me, I have the trainers I wear with joggers, the trainers I wear with jeans, fluffy DM boots and my converse. Occasionally will sneak a small pair of work shoes on there if I have to go into the office. But they all have a role to play and deserve a place on the shoe rack..

RedHelenB · 16/10/2022 13:30

Yabu

EmeraldShamrock1 · 16/10/2022 13:31

I have a little issue with the shoe rack too.

He'll either leave his size 12 shoes beside it or fill it with different pairs when there is 4 people in the house and a small shoe rack.

I leave the majority of mine upstairs and 2 downstairs.

He'll put on a different pair upstairs and take them off beside the shoe rack when he returns before you know it every pair he owns are in the hallway.

It's lazy half jobbing it.

I carry them up and throw them on his side of the room. Fun times. 😅

Cosmos123 · 16/10/2022 13:32

Stealth boast.

You have several pairs of shoes.

mavismorpoth · 16/10/2022 13:58

I wish my husband would put his shoes on the rack instead of by the rack.

FistFullOfRegrets · 16/10/2022 14:23

watcherintherye · 15/10/2022 00:23

After reading this thread I want a boot room now. I don’t want to have to make do with a shoe rack.

@watcherintherye I miss mine more than imaginable. Family entrance into the house (boot room, utility, kitchen). With a Main Entrance into the lovely hallway. Still it went, along with the Ex, so at least that's something!! 😂😂

GloriousGlory · 16/10/2022 14:57

Lovely! Well done. Having an organised home is not only welcoming but helps one think better, be more peaceful and have generally better mental well being.
Many people with mental health issues start off not tidying their environment leading to an unkempt home which makes it harder to have people over so they have less real life friends.
In the military keeping your area tidy and organised is important for a focused and productive mind. We'll done.

Over a pair of shoes left in a shoe place!

Threelittlelambs · 16/10/2022 15:10

Lovely! Well done. Having an organised home is not only welcoming but helps one think better

I have been to homes that are so spotless they aren’t welcoming at all, you fee there are rules you have missed, shoes or not? Bag in the table or floor…. You can’t sit comfortably or feel at home - it can have the opposite effect.

lap90 · 16/10/2022 15:13

Wow, had no idea my Mother was on here too.

jamdonut · 16/10/2022 15:29

You’d hate my daughter’s house- not only do they have a shoe rack completely full of their numerous shoes but they are also below the rack and, in some cases, doubled up! What’s the problem?😏

GloriousGlory · 16/10/2022 15:35

jamdonut · 16/10/2022 15:29

You’d hate my daughter’s house- not only do they have a shoe rack completely full of their numerous shoes but they are also below the rack and, in some cases, doubled up! What’s the problem?😏

Your daughter is not uptight, not sterile, easy going, bet there's us loads of love and random cuddles in the house.

Some people struggle with that lovely laid back attitude.

ilovepixie · 16/10/2022 15:48

RosesAndHellebores · 14/10/2022 21:43

It is easily resolved. You need a house with a boot room.

We have a worse quirk but at least we are on the same page. We have downstairs and upstairs slippers. We keep them on the little half landing at the bottom of the stairs and next to the drawing room which is carpeted.

We change from our downstairs slippers into our outdoor shoes in the boot room. We put our downstairs slippers on when we get home. If we go upstairs or use the drawing room we change into our soft soled slippers and leave our downstairs slipper on the half landing.

Jesus! That's very confusing! I wouldn't know if I was coming or going!