To wonder what you advised your failing children to do for careers?

[lennypenny]

If your child was failing in school due to not being very academic or simply just average; what did you advise them to do for their futures (not including trades)?

Any stories of how they still managed to build a successful life for themselves or are they in low paid, unfulfilling work?

Wow so if you aren't academic you can't have a decent career?

I’m a teacher so I can say this - school is just one big competition. In life, there will always be cleverer than you. Your child may not meet this mould - doesn’t mean they are failing. You need to find what they enjoy in general and celebrate that.

That's the question I suppose.

The world is full of successful people with zilch academic qual (Branson, Simon Reeve off the top of my head).
You can advise away. Kids will ignore. Be supportive of their interests & let them sort it out for themselves.

Some of my group of friends at school who were not academic went on to have the best careers/ make the most money. Those of us who went to Uni have not fared so well ! The one who people used to make fun of for being a bit dim has ended up with his own business employing quite a few people. Apprentices in a trace often lead to earning good money also.

Exams aren' t everything, the most successful people are not always the most intelligent. loving what you do makes a big difference.

To never give up - people can be average at school and have good careers, people can be average at school and find their feet at college, people can be average at school and return to education and do really well - so please stop saying they are failing!

Find what they like and follow that thread post 16 - life often begins when they leave school.

Average is fine. Passion matters. But what do they want? Show them what different careers make for average salary and help them steer toward their goal with internships etc. In other words if they don't have a passion then aim for money!

My ds has an apprenticeship lined up in a trades job. He's not academic.

If he fails this I'll put him through a HGV license.

In the nicest way I don't want my ds working in a shop or working for a pittance. If he can't manage a trade job then it's better to be on 60k for HGV driving rather than struggling on minimum wage.

Find something you enjoy doing. Life is long and work is hard. Try and find something that you enjoy at least. All jobs are tough, in different ways. Don't be defined by your pay or your qualifications. Unfulfilling work doesn't need to be - you might be doing something dull, but have some great colleagues. Or you might be low paid but enjoy what you do. Having a great career is not the be all and end all in life.

I know many people who didn’t go to uni who earn far more for far less stress than people who have uni careers.

The one who earns the most works in McDonalds managing several branches. Others are joiners and mechanics who have done very well.

My ex left school at 16 and now owns his own business and does very well, my mum was kicked out before sitting exams and returned to education as an adult - eventually having a very enjoyable teaching career, I left with 2 O levels and a CSE and now have a masters and a job I love! Stop with the 'failure' label

There's loads of careers that are brilliant and very well paid for less academic people.
Electricians, plumbers, carpenters and other trades are in short supply, highly in demand and tend to charge and therefore charge an arm and a leg.
I know a young lad who didn't do very well in his gcses and is training to be a locksmith.
It's fine not to be geared towards academic subjects. Doesn't mean they are a failure - it means that our stupid education system is letting them down by not giving a proper range of opportunities.

OP why not including trades?

Just because some people aren't academic doesn't meant they can't have a fantastic career.

There's lots of options for people who aren't into books and 'academic studying'

Suggest them looking into apprenticeships when they turn 16. It's more hands on and vocational learning rather than books and classrooms. There is pretty much most roles available in apprenticeship style format now.

Honestly, I'd be suggested a stem route of some description as most jobs will likely be automated at somepoint, so some trade. There's alot of money in those fields and their always going to be necessary, even after automation takes over!

Does your child have any interests or hobbies?

Any subjects that they are good at at school, even if it is a less academic subject?

There's lots of careers out there that you probably don't know exist. For instance, if you told me your child liked video games and was good at art then I'd suggest a career in video game graphics (there's more jobs in it than you'd imagine). This course is genuinely very good and is primarily interested in artistic talent rather than academic achievement.
www.pearsoncollegelondon.ac.uk/find-a-course/undergraduate/ba-ma-the-art-of-video-games-integrated-masters.html

I'm probably biassed, but the Armed Forces

Loads of different roles, and the country's biggest UK provider of adult education and training. So lots of opportunity to find a role that they want and to get (usually fully transferable) relevant qualifications, plus for those who really tanked at school catch-up English and maths.

Also, possible to transfer to officer cadre (if under 26)

It doesn't have to be their full career (you can leave after 4 years, occasionally shorter if exceptional circumstances). And it's one hell of a way to find out a lot about yourself

I got kicked out of school when I was 15 for being pregnant I now own my own business and employee staff.

I didn’t get a single GCSE

The trick is to always look for opportunities, take risks and not give up when doors are closed in your face

There is nothing wrong with being 'average' whatever that is. Not everyone is academically gifted. If fact not many people are. What counts is effort. Trying hard to do your best is much more important in life than brilliance. I would advise your child to concentrate on being emotionally intelligent, a team player and a hard worker.

I was very good at school without even trying. By the time I hit my mid twenties other people seemed to catch up with me and I don't seem to have the skills you need to apply my brain. I'm not wording it very well but of something doesn't come to me immediately I really struggle to keep ploughing away until I get it - it's like I can't get out of my brain and my brain is stuck in fixed mindset mode. So my career has sort of stalled.

Dh didn't do particularly well at school (then lied about it on his cv) but he's very adaptable and great socially and loves learning new things. He has a much better job than I'd hope to get both in terms of perks and salary.

School is just a tiny bit of life don't worry too much about it.

I wasn’t very academic in secondary school. I was too busy up to no good (nothing major, no drugs etc, but drinking, boys etc) to bother revising etc. I was pregnant when I did my GCSE’s. My son is 29 in a few days. Having him ignited something in me, I knew I was capable and went to college, then Uni (I commuted). Eventually when I graduated I moved from a small town in Wales to South London to take up a job. I’ve done well for myself in my career and I earn more than all my friends, and 4 times what my much cleverer brother earns. That’s not a boast, but just to illustrate that you can be average in school but excel later on. I think for me I found some subjects that I really got into which drove me forward.

What's your problem with trades?

Yes, virtually everyone in my family did badly at school and went on to do well in life. School isn’t for everyone and the assumption you need to be successful at school to have a fantastic career is nonsense.
My husband got very average exam results (left after GCSEs) and went on to work on a building site as a glazier - he now has a very successful business in the glazing industry and hasn’t stepped into a site for many years. One uncle became an agent and now has a successful agency, one opened a market stall that turned into a shop and now has a chain, a few became salesmen who have jobs with good wages, one family member is a photographer, one has a building company, one is a famous professional gambler.

I think going into a job you don’t love focuses you, your son can learn the basics to work in an office or if he’s physical as an apprentice in a trade. If he hates it he can swap to something else whilst still at home with no responsibility until he eventually finds something he likes.

My DD is overcoming great difficulties to attend college doing a level 1 course. She is succeeding, not failing.

I too am wondering why not trades op?