To wonder what you advised your failing children to do for careers?

[lennypenny]

If your child was failing in school due to not being very academic or simply just average; what did you advise them to do for their futures (not including trades)?

Any stories of how they still managed to build a successful life for themselves or are they in low paid, unfulfilling work?

Because she doesn’t want to include the obvious in the article she’s writing.

I did well at school, have four university degrees and at the top of my career (with no chance of further promotion) earn less than people I know who are tradespeople.

As a suggestion, though, has your child thought about the armed services? DB joined the Navy at 17 and is now out with high level engineering qualifications and a six figure job in the private sector.

Dd is not academic. She's dyslexic which also affect her executive functioning so studying is hard. Her dream is to be a vet but I've been casually mentioning vet nursing is more hands on with the animals. If she doesn't get the grades for the degree then there are vocational options. She's amazingly responsible when it comes to animals and it all just clicks in to place where it fails on paper in a formal environment so seems a good option for her. Another option would be childcare

Oh no, trades are FANTASTIC but I know my DS is completely unsuited to them!

Plus I really don't mean to offend by using the word failing. I just think life is very hard in low paid jobs.

My DS is in set 1 for maths. I have a tutor for him. He just went into a really bad mood as he tried to do his maths homework for 2 hours and couldn't work out how to do it. He seems to be able to do things when his tutor shows him. I just think if he struggles with GCSE maths how is he going to manage an A level in it. He wants to be an accountant/analyst/business consultant. I doubt he will get to his goal if he can't do Maths A level. I think he will be disappointed.

I asked him if he wanted help to do a revision plan for his GCSE and he said he would do it but he just went on the Xbox. He seems to be overwhelmed by thoughts GCSEs are looming.

do they have a part-time job ? If not, they should get one. And does their school offer appointments with qualified careers advisor ? Have you looked at courses at local colleges for post 16? If they can find a btec or T level they’re interested in, and check out the entry requirements, that gives them a target to aim for. I’d be looking at engineering / construction apprenticeships too.

I’d always advise trades. It’s the only way to live here and make decent money. If not trades then it’s fishing farming care or hospitality

Wow, your title is a little harsh, OP! I’d imagine that somebody reading this who didn’t do great at school would feel like shit reading this and thinking they are a failure.

School isn’t the right environment for everybody, people find their way in life, there is always the option to re- enter education or learn a trade (not sure why you are dismissing this?)

I hope you don’t let your child know you think they are failing.

Just seen your update. I love this approach to revision plans : m.youtube.com/watch?v=b7o09a7t4RA

I didn’t advise my DC anything - I helped them explore their options
One is less academic than the other and has made career choices involving being in services and more recently the NHS
Other whilst being more academic found their degree choice not to their liking and have moved sideways into a much better role financially too

I failed every GCSE and dropped out of college.

I am now a surgical first assistant and just accepted a role as department team leader.

truthfully I had no idea what I wanted to do when I was young so I simply didn’t bother. I got a job in A&E when I turned 20 working as a care assistant, found what I liked, did an Access course and took myself off to university to study Operating Department Practice. My parents never once guided me, I figured it out myself.

My partner also failed all his GCSEs and has no other qualification. He’s working as a creative director. We’re on 6 figures between us. Not bad for a household without a single GCSE.

Apprenticeship.
I firmly believe that had we insisted on our below academic average child into further education, he would not be here.
School was utter utter torture for him.

Apprenticeship was the making of him.

He earns 3 times what I did at his age, is happy enough and has not taken his life.

For that, I am forever grateful.

Sales. There is so much snobbery surrounding sales roles. I out earn my friends who are doctors, nurses, teachers pharmacists HR etc.

I'm really sorry. I don't mean to offend.

What are his strengths, you've given a short list of 3 very general jobs but is he good at being analytical for example, or finding solutions to problems, or detail oriented drawings.....

I have 3 really crap ALevel results in English, Chemistry and Biology and no university degree but I'm Director Level in Cybersecurity. Lots of people I work with have no or limited formal qualifications but they have the ability to learn using their own initiative, cut through crap, see where the problems are and find a solution to them.

I think if your son is already in set 1 for maths you're over thinking things.

Are they creative?

Music production
Fashion
TV
Ceramics
Theatre
Composing
Garden design
Chef
Interior design
Stage design

Soooo many things!

Did you DC do an apprenticeship at 16 or 18?

I am very clever and work in a shop BECAUSE I find it far more fulfilling than working for an international law firm, which I did and left because it made me miserable. Low paid jobs aren't necessarily miserable - plenty of them are badly paid because people enjoy the work enough to want to stay, even if it means a lower material standard of living.

I left school at 16 with no qualifications ended up being a mature student at 30 paid for by work. Got a good degree, no student debt and a amazing job now. Wasn't ready then but i was a 30.

I think it is wonderful that people land on their feet after not following traditional routes? But how did you go from A to B and land these good roles? Is it a bit right place at right time and merit or how?

Outside of the mumsnet every teenager does Alevels and goes to university bubble ,there are all sorts of options my nearly 16 isn't academic I don't tell him he's failing because he isn't ik just persuading him to look at options more suited to him.

No not at all!

Interesting. May I ask what area you work in?
Are you under a lot or pressure to meet unattainable targets?

@NoKnickerElastic perhaps but I think doing A level maths is a big jump from GSCE, so he may struggle and get disheartened.