Why do women hate an OW?

[Oatmealbiscuits]

When a woman is seeing a married man, why do people say they wouldn't want her as a friend, in their lives anymore etc? Why are they judged solely on one thing when there may be so many other positives to their character.

I'm curious really, for the record I'm not an other woman, but my friend is. It's her business and I shall be there when the shit inevitably hits the fan.

If some posters on here had their way, she wouldn't have friends and would be isolated and lonely. I just don't think anyone deserves that when in reality it's the man who has taken vows.

It used to be a popular street name in Britain, Gropecunt Lane was in various places in England.

Fuck me lol

English can be so harsh. I bet that would sound lovely in French.😀

Yeah they did a lot of that on those lanes 😂

It was lazy, angry, thin-skinned abuse from a person who was driven to rage by a) having the misogyny in their worldview called out and b) being told to "keep up" after forgetting in post 2 (via an angry, accusatory rant) what they had been ranting about in post 1.

It couldn't be plainer what kind of person you are and what level on which you debate, and I'm not giving such a character any more of my time. Although I'll certainly report if I see you abusing anyone else, which I'm sure I will.

Absolute nonsense.

The poster was unnecessary rude and combative and I called her out on it.

And the only person insulting people on this thread is yourself.

And I'll report your posts if I see you at it too. Now go and try bullying someone else.

It couldn't be plainer what kind of person you are and what level on which you debate, and I'm not giving such a character any more of my time.

Ditto X 1000.

Thank goodness there are some normal people with a sense of himour on this thread.

My go to for a lower level of irritation or disgust than cunt, is probably "utter wanker

I appluade you on your very good choice madam.

It's the T's in utter and gurning the face of the W that gives it the kick.

Fuck off's a good one, plenty of angry facial expression, with baring of teeth. 😂

Given you see yourself as a bit of a talent on this categorising malarkey - what category do you put women who refer to other women as slags and sluts?

I'm a highly educated woman to be honest (BA, MA) . In a job that requires a high level of literacy and writing skills ironically. I'm not bothered about 'outing' myself, I'm a writer and easily traceable.

I call a cunt a cunt 🤷🏻‍♀️

No idea what MC woman is but yeah, sure Jan 👍

Given you see yourself as a bit of a talent on this categorising
malarkey - what category do you put women who refer to other women as
slags and sluts?

To be clear are we talking about the phonetics of the words or the meanings🤓

Most definitely not am I thinking of a vag when I say it, you are totally correct 😂😂😂

But don't ever elude to not connecting it to a vagina, either, because the OW on this thread will tell you that you're also a closet mysoginist and haven't realised it yet. 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

I wouldn’t stop being friends with a friend if they become the OW.

Id guess others would be afraid she may take their husbands though so distance themselves.

I've enjoyed this short interlude of historical facts etc, thank you ladies.

I must say that my reading of history and useless facts was probably foistered on me whilst my h was riding some unknown ow bareback across town.
It's not all doom and gloom though, I joined a band and could be often seen doing the sound checks shouting TESTING, TESTING 123, checking the mike for spit soakabilty and plosive sounds.

So for that ow, I thank you 😉

Noone is completely good or bad, people are grey and I do agree that the person who should be held first and foremost accountable is the married person who chooses to cheat.

However, if she is fully aware that the person is married and that her actions will harm a family and another person and she chooses to do it anyway then that's on her and yes she needs to be accountable for her actions and their consequences on other people. I also think there's a difference in supporting someone and enabling their behaviours, I wouldn't necessarily cut someone out completely for a one off but if they consistently made choices (and let's be real- this is an informed choice she's making that she knows will harm another person/ children) then I also don't think I could listen to that indefinitely without feeling complicit myself. If I knew who the wife was I'd feel torn between wanting to support my friend and wanting to tell the wife and friends don't drag friends into shitty moral positions like that with them. I also generally keep friends who's values and moral align with mine and hers wouldn't. So if she saw it as a one off mistake, fine. But if its a longstanding affair then no I wouldn't be her sounding board forever knowing that another family's world could come crashing down because of her actions.

At the end of the day she can justify it whatever way she likes but she's still choosing to continue this instead of as you say go for therapy and being responsible for herself. It sounds like she is using you as a way to talk herself into it instead of acknowledging that she's partaking in something wrong and hurtful and I don't think you're helping in that scenario. If it were me I'd be straight with her that if it ends and she wants support with that my door is always open but I won't have any other conversations about it because I can't agree with what she's doing because it's not right.

Nope, I would rather be all those things than an OW!

And this..

All these people sitting on their high moral horse and calling everyone c*s.
It's rather ugly and yet you don't see it.

don't see what ?

I don't see ow running around with placards admitting their activities but I know they exist.

No one is infallible.

Would I ditch them ? Depends . Not if they didn't know he was taken

I think I would find it hard to keep friendship going because would lose respect for her

This!

Speaking as someone who's family friend died after contracting HIV from her husband, who got it from his side-piece. Affairs have consequences - women have the right to know the exact terms in which they are having sex and the nature of the risk they are taking - that right doesn't cease just because you're married or in a relationship.

A massive element of the cheated-on partner's consent to sex within the relationship is removed by an affair. The choice to potentially participate in a version of rape (ie sex not able to be fully consented to due to pertinent details being hidden / the basis of consent being changed unilaterally without agreement or knowledge / sex obtained by deception) is not ever ok in my book. Yes the married person has responsibility, but if the OW knows he's married then she also made her choice. Anyone knowingly participating in the removal of another woman's consent is no friend of mine.

And c'mon - of course he's going to say he's not sleeping with his wife. Are you really going to trust the word of a proven liar?