Anyone else going to jail?

[NeversmileataCrocodile]

Never usually answer a call from an unknown number but I just did: it was a recorded message with lots of terms you never want to hear, HMRC, jail term, prosecution, I did panic a bit and pressed one to hear more, better make sure I suppose. A nice lady from "Her Majesty's Revenue and Custom' asked for my full name so she could check my file, I said she should know it since they called me, the line went dead. I'm not going to jail am I? Anyone else?

I'm terribly impressed that, when they want to deliver my parcel to me, the Fedex has somehow discovered my mobile phone number and is kind enough to text me about it.

I’ve had all the scam calls - unpaid tax, a warrant for my arrest, a transaction for Amazon Prime, £900 on a debit card etc.
Once I did press 1 and when they realised I knew it was a scam they swore at me several times.
If it’s a number I’m not expecting I don’t generally answer anymore. If it’s really important they can leave a message.

I kept getting an automated one
" This is HMRC. A warrant has been issued for your arrest. There has been suspicious activity on your national insurance number. You will soon be arrested"

😂😂

Surely what you should do OP is to reply to the nice Nigerian prince whose been emailing you, once you pay him £100 to get things processed then he will give you millions of pounds, that should be more than enough to cover your tax bill,.

If you are feeling generous you could use some of it to fund new lives for those under threat of imminent arrest like those on this thread. I'm guessing a large house in a sunny country with a large cash allowance would work for most 😁

I'm under imminent threat of arrest so am happy to volunteer to be your first beneficary 😁😁

Depends how much time I have. If I'm busy I hang up. If I have a little time I give my name as Mary Hinge or Jenny Tall. (Childish I know but makes me laugh). Or I might put them "on hold" while I get the "man of the house" and put on music of my choice to entertain them. Once it was Lizzo's Juice, another time was Tiger Feet. One of them waited til the end of the track til I hung up!

I had one of these supposedly from the NCA. They said there was a warrant for my arrest and then they asked for my name

I told them it was Lynne Owens and they carried on about the arrest - after about 5 minutes i suggested they Google me. Apparently I am a very naughty lady!! My colleagues thought it was hilarious.

I had a call from a chap, wanting to do a full financial review with me. No way was I going to give some random caller this kind of info. A little bit of time to kill so I asked him what would happen if I failed the review… he just stuck to his spiel. Eventually he got bored when I asked him if he was going to send assassins round if I failed.

For others, a bit of Liam Neeson’s “…what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career, skills that make me a nightmare for people like you.” also works wonders.

Next time I will say something like 'Oh dear have they caught up with me for the money I owe ' And try to insist they hand over their bank details, which bank,, name on account etc. 'So I can pay you the fine' .
Then I can report them for fraud.

Yup had the arrest one. Police would be with me in the next hour.
Asked them to pass on a message to hurry up and make sure I’m sentenced today and not bailed. I’m skint and really need a holiday.

still waiting and it’s been years.

Thank you for reminding me about him @CatServant2020 I am not heartless, I did send the what he asked at the time but there were unexpected delays last time we emailed, that must be all sorted now, so will send him my bank details again.
Between you and me; with several husbands to think about and a few people on this thread who are on to me that I have to pay off, it won't be enough for all of us reprobates to live off. Oh how I wished I'stayed on the straight and narrow!

I once got a call from someone pretending to be a police officer at Paddington station. He also addressed me by my husband’s surname (which I didn’t take) and got irate when I kept saying no such person existed.

He then got a bit shirty when I asked him if he meant Paddington Green station- and said what a miracle it was considering it had been shut down years previously.

Not had the HMRC calls for long time. Currently getting texts purportedly from GOVUK to say I’ve been selected for reduced energy bills. Can’t say what the rest of the text says as can only see the first two lines without opening message and I delete them immediately.

The recording quality was poor but I got a voicemail telling me customs officials had either arrested someone i knew or that they were coming to arrest me because of one of my packages, I couldn’t tell for certain what they meant. No one I cared about disappeared from my life and they never showed up to arrest me.

I’ve been threatened with jail at least 7 Times... yet I’m still here never even been in trouble with the police 😂

These are my favourite ones. I always have a good chat with them. Although I once told them I worked in the police and would run a check on my file and a trace on the call now and they of course hung up and I spent the rest of the day paranoid I’d be arrested for impersonating a police officer!

Scam!

I had one from Russia earlier in the week! I also work for HMRC and it’s staggering the amount of people who genuinely believe this to a real call.