I have been asked to host a party for a friend in my house while 9 months pregnant

[BrinaEds]

AIBU, I have been asked by a close friend to host a party in my house for them. I'll be 9 months pregnant by the day of the party and I'm already tired all the time but I don't feel like I can say no. I would have thought that some consideration would have been given to the fact I'm pregnant before they even asked but they recently did helped me out with something which they pushed to do but was helpful (nothing on this scale) so now I feel obliged. My main concern about the whole thing is having a bunch of strangers in my house (20-30 people), the possibility of picking up a cold/flu and the deep clean that will have to happen after the event because tidying is not the same as cleaning. DH says he will manage the day and sort out all the cleaning after but I just don't feel comfortable with the whole thing. AIBU?

[PloddyPop]

This is what Church & Community halls are for
Put your foot down and say its not going to happen

[Iloveacurry]

They must be incredibly stupid or CFs. What did they do for you anyway and why can’t they use their own house?

[LuciaPopp]

[Edgeof35]

YABU due to the fact that you didn't just outright say no. "No, I'll be 9 months pregnant" should be self-explanatory without further details.

[Hoppinggreen]

If you agree to this then it will be awful and it will be your own fault.
Why is your H not telling them to bugger off as well?

[HotWashCycle]

YABU to even contemplate saying yes. Just be a grown up and say No.
Friend is being totally UR to even think of asking you this. Tell DH to have your back in saying No, along the lines already suggested. But just No is enough!

[Piffle11]

Do you think they helped you that time in order to land this on you? I really can't imagine asking a friend to host a party for me at all let alone when they will be nine months pregnant… What if you are in labour? Are they planning on having everybody in your home whilst you and your husband are at the hospital? This is an absolute no no… You shouldn't be feeling bad for saying no: they clearly don't feel bad for asking you in the first place! What an absolutely bizarre thing to expect someone in your position to agree to!

[Crabwoman]

Why didn't you just say,

"Sorry, I'll be 9 months pregnant at that point, so it will be impossible"?

If they ask why, then they are truly stupid.

[cestlavielife]

You really need to learn to speak up for yourself and your future baby/child. Stop being a wimp

[5zeds]

It’s your in laws isn’t it and they want to use your bigger property? The answer has to be “no” but if you like them they could move it forward two months. If it’s Christmas ABSOLUTELY not, as you will all get colds and/or covid.

[Mummyexpat]

Hi OP, I hope your pregnancy is going well, bar these CF’s!! 🤣 As others have said, your baby may come early, you may be in labour and need your safe space at home… any which way, you don’t need to be hosting a party! The stress of it all won’t do you or your baby any good either. Just because they’ve done you some sort of favour in the past doesn’t mean they can demand “repayment” whenever or however they want. Be kind to yourself, say no, and enjoy the nesting period in YOUR house.

[KingCharlespen]

You could be in labour or racing to the toilet every 5 minutes, it should be very easy to say no to something so unreasonable.

[gamerchick]

Why in earth haven't you or your bloke said no? Are you both pushovers?

Tell them it's not happening and hope they have a good party wherever they have it. The end.

Stand up for yourself ffs.

[Crabwoman]

@5zeds

It’s your in laws isn’t it and they want to use your bigger property? The answer has to be “no” but if you like them they could move it forward two months. If it’s Christmas ABSOLUTELY not, as you will all get colds and/or covid.

Oh if it's in-laws then tell them you are planning a home birth and will need to prepare the front room from 8 months onwards 😂

[Kitkatcatflap]

I am assuming people see you as easy going, the person asking the favour is treating you like a pushover.

DM me their number OP. I'll text them for you.

[Noteverybodylives]

YABU just say no!

You can even explain exactly how you have on here.
Although I’m not sure why you would even need to explain.

Send then a text and apologise for causing an inconvenience but you’ve been thinking about it and the fact that you might give birth any minute is worrying you and you think it’s best they find an alternative place now, so you don’t let them down on the day if you go into labour.

[OperaStation]

That’s ridiculous. Just say no.

[Autumnisclose]

Why are you even contemplating this. I swear this place is full of doormats. Just say no.

[SleeplessInEngland]

Just say "no, I'm 9 months pregnant FFS". I don't understand why people are scared to be honest with friends.

[Crunchymum]

This has to be a wind up as surely no-one can be this pathetic in real life?

[SamphirethePogoingStickerist]

Your only response to both 'friend' and DH is "Are you mad?"

'Friend' can sod off. That's a ludicrous request!

[Shiloh139]

YANBU. "I'm sorry but it's too close to my due date for me to be able to do that. Plus there's the real possibility the baby will arrive early, and then your whole event would need to be cancelled as there's no way it could take place in my home then."

[BrinaEds]

Hahaha how did you know!

[LimeTwists]

“That doesn’t work for me. At nine months pregnant, I don’t want to take on the planning and hosting of your party.’

It needs to be this simple, OP. I’m a really anxious people-pleaser and even I would put my foot down at this ridiculous, thoughtless idea of theirs. Why isn’t your husband being more assertive as well? Doesn’t he think it’s ridiculous?!

[BrinaEds]

@Crabwoman

Oh if it's in-laws then tell them you are planning a home birth and will need to prepare the front room from 8 months onwards 😂

Hahaha How did you know!