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Original poster

To ask what is the biggest mistake you've made in your life

327 replies

Smileeriley · 04/10/2022 00:39

Mine is a double whammy, getting married and buying my current house.

The house in particular is a noose around my neck. I'm basically renting it from my mortgage company and it will never be mine.

Worst thing I ever did was but this house with my ex husband. He's a whole other thread.

OP posts:
Idratherbepaddleboarding · 04/10/2022 07:35

Took a promotion in April. I’ve gone from loving my job and thinking it was a career for life to dreading every second and applying for new jobs.

Kevinbaconsrealwife · 04/10/2022 07:44

Wasting so, so much money with fuck all to show for it…..

Elderflower14 · 04/10/2022 07:45

Mine is my one that got away... After my DH died an old friend used to come and see me... He was always kind to me... Wish I had asked him out sooner... He eventually asked me out... The afternoon of our date he texted me to say he had to go to his mother as she was very ill... I didn't see him again after that.. I did hear from him a few years ago and he was married with a daughter...

oranges88 · 04/10/2022 07:47

Screwed up my career. I’m now late 30s and still on a very low salary in an unskilled job. I wish I’d got better qualified in my 20s to put myself on a better career trajectory. To be fair to me, I had quite debilitating mental health problems during my 20s that I didn’t seek help for until recently. I’m feeling much better now but have no idea how to change things or improve my prospects.

heartbroken22 · 04/10/2022 07:47

Had hyperemesis and had to have a termination (tfmr) to survive. Regret it but know that I may have not been alive for my children had I carried on.

Maireas · 04/10/2022 07:48

This reply has been deleted

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

It's not a sign.
You did what was best for you in the circumstances. No guilt 🌺

RosesAndHellebores · 04/10/2022 07:48

@DimplesToadfoot that resonates. I was an accident. My mother has told me that I was only born because she couldn't go through with an abortion so married my father when they were totally wrong for each other. I am quite clear that she blames me for "ruining her career".

I understand how it feels not to have a mother's love. However she has a problem not me.

Buggersticks · 04/10/2022 07:48

@DimplesToadfoot omg love, please don't feel that way about yourself! None of that was your fault. Xx

jammygem · 04/10/2022 07:51

Was supposed to move to another country and move in with my best friend - he'd already lined up a job for me and everything. Decided against it on the advice of someone who barely knew me.

That decision had a huge knock-on effect for a lot of stuff, and I wish I'd listened to my own gut instead of effectively a stranger.

WhileAFoxIsWatching · 04/10/2022 07:52

Sold a flat in Brighton and returned to London to study, eventually doing a PhD.
I am suited to life in Brighton. I am not suited to academia.
Thought I was being 'sensible'.
I guess that money from my brief, shitty academic career did allow me to buy a flat somewhere else by the sea.
But I stand out here a bit too much, whereas in Brighton I fit in.

backacge · 04/10/2022 07:53

Sleeping with my best friends partner. Was 11 years ago when we were teenagers but I broke her heart and lost an amazing friend. It changed the course of both our lives but it also has taught me some valuable lessons.

Fuwari · 04/10/2022 07:56

Not asking my grandparents if I could live with them when my mum and dad split up. My parents were abusive in different ways and I ended up suffering years of hell with my dad and my mum didn’t care. My grandparents adored me and I believe they would have said yes. But I didn’t get to see them once I lived with my dad. I did afterwards but I was an adult by then. My whole life would have turned out differently.

I’m in a good place now (finally in my 50s) but years of abusive parents took their toll in so many ways.

DorritLittle · 04/10/2022 07:58

WhileAFoxIsWatching · 04/10/2022 07:52

Sold a flat in Brighton and returned to London to study, eventually doing a PhD.
I am suited to life in Brighton. I am not suited to academia.
Thought I was being 'sensible'.
I guess that money from my brief, shitty academic career did allow me to buy a flat somewhere else by the sea.
But I stand out here a bit too much, whereas in Brighton I fit in.

I can relate to this, I moved from somewhere I fitted in fine for a sensible job. Still here 15 years later and still don't feel like I fit in. I also don't have the job anymore!!

@NeverAdmittedThisBefore I do not think you caused your friends infection - in a hospital, not getting one would be a challenge for many. And you didn't know.

Tabbouleh · 04/10/2022 07:59

Can't admit it on here Would only get deep disapproval from those who haven't walked in my shoes.

DorritLittle · 04/10/2022 08:02

Maireas · 04/10/2022 07:48

It's not a sign.
You did what was best for you in the circumstances. No guilt 🌺

Show quote history

Agree with this💐

WhileAFoxIsWatching · 04/10/2022 08:02

Yeah, if there's anything I have learned, it's to do things that fit my temperament. I am not infinitely malleable. To accept myself.
Love to all of us who don't fit in.

MintyGreenDreams · 04/10/2022 08:03

Marrying my first husband at age 24.He was the first man to treat me well and I got carried away.

Georgeskitchen · 04/10/2022 08:06

Pregnancy and abortion at 15

Pixiedust1234 · 04/10/2022 08:10

Marrying a man who has systematically broken me with a thousand cuts. I didn't realise what he was doing and now my health is so bad I am financially stuck with him until I die. Hopefully it won't be long.

Sillystripytail · 04/10/2022 08:10

Getting our dog. His personality clashes with mine and I just can't bring myself to love him. He's such hard work. It's been 2 years and he's obviously looked after but I do think he'd be happier with someone who loves his personality. My son loves him so I wouldn't rehome him and the judgement from others would drive me mad.

Georgeskitchen · 04/10/2022 08:11

Georgeskitchen · 04/10/2022 08:06

Pregnancy and abortion at 15

Posted too soon.
leaving my hometown and losing touch with friends.
not studying for qualifications at college, leading to a lifetime of shitty jobs.
Marriages 1 and 2 (and sometimes 3)
Not too bad in the grand scheme of things. Some the posts on here are desperately sad x

NothingIsWrong · 04/10/2022 08:12

Always doing what other people want and not what I want. I'm 44 now, and while I have a good career, 3 fabulous children, nice house, decent husband, it's all due to choices made by other people.

I don't know if I've lost myself or if I never really knew who I was. I don't know what I want but I am just so tired of other peoples expectations

JustBeKinder · 04/10/2022 08:16

Married the wrong man then foolishly gave him a second chance 🥹

newtb · 04/10/2022 08:16

Marrying my ex - an abusive narcissist
Going to university to study biochemistry, when chemistry would have been better. Dropped out and did by day release, but it means I don't have a degree.
Not reporting my 'd'm for taking me to her paedophile friends. There was a time when Blair was pm when everyone got legal aide - could have taken her to the cleaners, and she'd have died slopping out in Styal.

Blaise19 · 04/10/2022 08:16

Not giving up alcohol many years earlier. Life is so much better without it. But then, it's something that can only be done when we are ready...