To not understand why double barrel surnames are so wrong/bizarre to some people?

[CarsonViolet]

So I recently registered the birth of my first child and gave him a double barelled surname. His name layout is Daniel Eric (My surname) (DHs surname). (None of these are actually my son's name just an example!)

In laws were visiting yesterday and were having a look at his birth certificate and were disappointed to see the surname. We did tell them that my name would be in there but apparently they just assumed it was a middle name 🙄

Cue all the 'concerns' and old fashioned twaddle about "It's just nicer and easier" and "what happens when he marries someone with a double barrel name" blah blah blah.

Am I being silly to have assumed that this crap was dead? Sure people have their own opinions on what they would personally do but to tell other people off about it?

Wanted a rant more than anything tbh but I just find it so bizarre that women wanting to share a surname with the child they carried and birthed is still contentious to some people 🤔

Can I get an example of when one person on here said something 'insightful?

I'll wait 😂

This.

Jacob Rees-Mogg

Is also the reason I'd never double barrel, the man gives me nightmares and is the holder of a double barrel name 😂

Some PP said this was untrue but it is, My parents weren't married when I was born (late 80s). I had my mum's name until I was married. Having the mums name is the real tradition it was just less common to have unmarried parents as they'd usually have a shotgun wedding.

So you never read the incredibly sneering and insulting comment I was replying to then? Funny that you choose to attack me for defending myself with honesty instead of the person doing the belittling...

What about my comment screamed 'grandiose' to you? Is being honest about your life something only DB snobs do? 😂

I have already told you some insights, but you are defensive to them and quite obviously bored.

Instead of looking for outlet for your frustrations - your time would be better spent looking after your baby....

Bye now

So many people saying it's pretentious.

Good grief, is it pretentious to want your kids to have your surname included in their surname? I kept my surname when I married, is that pretentious too? I also use my title of 'Dr' (PhD) on forms, so I suppose I am viewed as pretentiousness-central.

As to what my kids will do with their surnames if and when they marry, that's entirely up to them.

Hyphenated first names really make me secretly eye roll 🙄, so pretentious and way too an occurrence now.

Oh god OP you are really not helping yourself here - eeek

@FlaminNoraPhylis

Ah the classic "I have nothing left to say so time to tell the woman who's not taking my word as gospel to go away and tend to her child". Nice.

My child Is doing beautifully thank you 😊Now where are these 'insights' you speak of?

Carson Violet Prententious-Prat
Carson Violet Sky High- Salary
Carson Violet Richer Than You- Richardson
Carson Violet Prodigious- Pregnancy Package.

Not sure which I like more...

I'm so sorry but you've just reminded me of that episode of Friends when Ross introduced himself in the hospital as Dr Geller and Rachel tells him not to "because that means something here" 😂

That's convenient.

But let's assume you're telling the truth. Why, having read all these posts, were you moved to tell us that nobody cares even though you've been furnished with examples of people who clearly do?

I'm curious about this too 🤔

Oh I never introduce myself as Dr Dirt, it's just for forms. But then I wouldn't introduce myself as Ms Dirt either, just as Dues Dirt.

I read an American novel recently, in which the protagonists talked to and about each other as 'Dr X', 'Dr Y'. I thought, do people really do that? No-one I know does.

So Rees-Mogg is chunky and long compared to Thomasson?

Lots of people with double barrelled names have one very common and short name that is widely used in the UK e.g. Rees, Smith, Jones, Box, Hill

I've got friends with common names - some short, others not - who have been caught out by being mixed up with someone else. Shitty if you are depending on being paid that month.

I can’t understand why it’s pretentious?! Such a weird accusation!

Flangelasashes Cantafford Thebillsthismonth

Flangelasashes Ontothe Lasttinofbeans

Flangelasashes Hadtosellthebaby Topayformefags

Oh look. I can partake in needless, childish bullying to. Anything else?

OP I feel your pain and have had trouble from the ILs too (not from my own parents who presumably were pleased that their name was passed on to the DGCs)
My take on this is that parents of men are worried by this, DP was an only child and they were worried that 'DP surname' will die out, he will be the last one...never mind that the DGCs all HAVE his surname....and mine too. They also could not cope with me not changing my name and would send cards to ' Ms X his surname-my surname ' and as my DD has the same initial as me that just looks like it's intended for her!
It's crazy how much fuss people can make about simply either not doing something, or finding a logical solution to a problem,.
Patriarchy is definitely at the root of this.

Not sure why people think you are pretentious using an academic title you gained through hard work. I suppose they don't realise that people like medical doctors, vets and dentists while they are allowed to use it, it is a courtesy title.

I’m so surprised at the vitriol from people who haven’t double barrelled their names…. so strange to have such an angry reaction? I’m baffled.

@CarsonViolet
I think most people in the U.K. find double barrelled names pretentious, comical, and/or if recently concocted, ostentatious and (gasp) aspirational, perhaps all of the above. They’ve been viewed this way for a long time. A very long time. Call your kid what you want, but just as with all the mn threads about people who want to call their kid Jaxyn or Shardonne, you should know that your kid will be judged by it. To what degree, I don’t know, but the cultural baggage of a double barrelled name is not going to disappear any time soon.

Clunky not chunky. But in my experience I've seen the likes of

Williams-Protheroe
Thomas-Williams
Smitham-Douglas

Not actual names, but you get 2 syllable surnames or more in each half.

And for those that I knew growing up where it was;

Louise Helen Thomas Williams

So no hyphen they are now known as simply Louise Williams professionally they don't use the first "surname"

Ha ha All you have done there my dear is cement my point. Absolutely mortified for you.