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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Guys who slide into DM's

187 replies

madasacatter · 24/09/2022 21:21

I had a guy slide into my DM's twice and whilst this isn't the first guy to or even that bad in what he said, something about this one irked me and I feel like as it's obvious from his profile that he has a long-term partner/wife that I should send a screenshot to her.

YABU - It's none of my business, don't send anything
YANBU - Send her a screenshot, she deserves to know about his behaviour

OP posts:
Agapornis · 26/09/2022 10:07

@madasacatter Not sure whether it's his or your landscaping company, but if it's his I'd leave him an unimpressed review.

@Ameanstreakamilewide Please do tell your brother. The nice men in your life need to know who the shit men are. In my experience the nice ones appreciate being told and are really supportive. I'd take a screenshot, forward it to your brother and ask whether they've discussed you recently.

Cupofteaonesugar · 26/09/2022 13:07

Sliding into DMs means someone direct messaging them, particular someone they don't know.

There, you have it.

Now all the comedians being so confused with that term can just stop and move on.

OneTC · 26/09/2022 14:20

It's a perfectly descriptive term that conveys well what's happening, some one trying to make a smooth entrance. If you couldn't work out what the meaning was from the post I'd politely suggest you're a bit thick.

vimeo.com/67189398

Original poster
madasacatter · 26/09/2022 15:00

Appeciated everyone who's said about the meaning, I really thought it a fairly universal phrase - thanks for making me feel young though!

I thinks its the perfect phrase because I actually share the general dislike of how it sounds.

Guys think its cool, slick or smooth to direct message a woman uninvited and often someone they dont know at all, typically with a half-baked compliment or the most low investment message imaginable like just saying "hot" or "wyd" [what you doing?], with a view to hitting on her. And the icky sound of it aligns perfectly with the icky feeling it gives the female recipient.

OP posts:
Aprilx · 26/09/2022 15:13

Mothership4two · 26/09/2022 09:54

@Calandor explained the meaning just three posts up from yours @Aprilx

Thank you. When a thread gets to seven pages, I tend to skim read or just read the OPs posts so I missed that. 😊

So with the new knowledge, big deal, ignore it if not interested. Men have always flirted with / propositioned women.

Marvellousmadness · 26/09/2022 15:31

So. You are om social media
With an unlocked profile
And you wanna whinge about a guy "sliding" into your "dms"
Really?? 🙄

The guy sent you a message
Block and move on

Or do some sliding yourself

Im sliding out now

tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz · 26/09/2022 15:44

Guys think its cool, slick or smooth to direct message a woman uninvited and often someone they dont know at all, typically with a half-baked compliment or the most low investment message imaginable like just saying "hot" or "wyd" [what you doing?], with a view to hitting on her. And the icky sound of it aligns perfectly with the icky feeling it gives the female recipient.

//

Actually Op, that's a good description particularly of the sliding part which I was perplexed by.

And this isn't directed at you but many other posters ... I think any sneering seems to be directed at us who weren't familiar with the term and not the other way round.

Every day is a school day Confused

Aprilx · 26/09/2022 16:53

OneTC · 26/09/2022 14:20

It's a perfectly descriptive term that conveys well what's happening, some one trying to make a smooth entrance. If you couldn't work out what the meaning was from the post I'd politely suggest you're a bit thick.

vimeo.com/67189398

How is it polite to suggest that somebody is “a bit thick”? I didn’t find it at all a descriptive term and I did think about what it might mean, but to no avail.

I did a degree in maths in the late 80s / early 90s, I have a professional qualification and I did a masters in a non scientific subject in 2019. I have even done informal Mensa tests that indicate my IQ is around 140, of course it could be revealed to be less than that had I done a proper test but I am confident it would be well above average. I am not thick. I just don’t know what OP meant.

ChutneyVirgin · 27/09/2022 21:12

Aprilx · 26/09/2022 16:53

How is it polite to suggest that somebody is “a bit thick”? I didn’t find it at all a descriptive term and I did think about what it might mean, but to no avail.

I did a degree in maths in the late 80s / early 90s, I have a professional qualification and I did a masters in a non scientific subject in 2019. I have even done informal Mensa tests that indicate my IQ is around 140, of course it could be revealed to be less than that had I done a proper test but I am confident it would be well above average. I am not thick. I just don’t know what OP meant.

Show quote history

There is clever and there’s being up-to-date with social trends.

You obviously are not. Stop being so ridiculous

AlwaysLatte · 27/09/2022 21:27

What? Is he borrowing your shoes?

AlwaysLatte · 27/09/2022 21:29

Oh, I read a lot of replies but not all of them. I still don't understand it but at least I know it's not about shoes now!

Aussiegirl123456 · 27/09/2022 21:56

His poor partner. I wouldn’t tell her but I’d be blocking him..

And for those of you accusing OP of being too revealing in her posts, that is a shame.

I ended up deleting LinkedIn where I kept getting numerous ‘slides in to my DMs’ weekly. I only had a headshot on there and it was the least provocative picture imaginable. It’s not flattering, it’s annoying and disrespectful.

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