Would you lie on your bed in the clothes you've been wearing all day?

[blueskyeve]

My dh got home from the dentist yesterday afternoon (he had a wisdom tooth taken out), he was in a bit of pain and discomfort so went to lie down. I went to check if he was ok/needed anything and saw he was lying on our bed fully clothed with the clothes he had on all day. I told him that was disgusting and could he remove them please, but he didn't understand why. He said (via text as he couldn't talk) 'But where have I been sat? The dentist? Where everything is famously clean?' That day he had also been sat in the car, been to the shops, taken our dc to school. If it was me I would always remove jeans etc. and put on pj's or clean leggings/joggers before lying on the bed.

Who is right?

What do you think would happen? He would spontaneously combust in the bed?

YABU and very odd. Unless his clothes have mud, shit (be it animal or human) or vomit there is no issue.

Changing from outdoor clothes to indoor clothes/not wearing shoes indoors /not sitting on a bed in outdoor clothes is the norm for some of my black friends. Their parents were the same and it's simply part of how they were raised. Certainly not new thing to me.

Under the circs I would have not said anything about it to your DH - he was in pain etc.

To those talking about OCD pls think before you type eg "Are you OCD? "?? 🙄

Where do you get changed if you don't wear outside clothes in the house? Doesn't that generate tons of washing?

And probably put suitcases on their bed 🤮

OP, you are right. I am, maybe, the only one on your side.
outside is full of germs.

how hard to change clothes after going home?
oh dear, he was not big ill or can't move, just pain in a mouth.

Remember when people did this at the start of covid

Thinking that this is disgusting isn't a normal level of health anxiety.

We build and maintain our immune systems through exposure. Too clean makes us vulnerable.

I completely agree with you OP. My OH does this after getting on buses or the tube and sitting in his office and various cafes, shops etc all day. I think it’s gross.

And worse of all, he lies on my side of the bed when he does it because it’s nearest the bedroom door.

I’ve asked him not to, or at least to lie on his own side but he never remembers.

I’m amazed so many people think this is ok. I have a wash before bed and the last thing I want to do is put my face on a pillow where an hour before by husband has been sat in his filthy jeans.

I bet you have really filthy sex. Not.

Disgusting to lie in or on the bed with clothes on that he had been out in. Sat in a dentist chair where so many other people will sit throughout the day, never mind the saliva and bloodĺ.

Being you must be exhausting 🤣

Good grief, this is batshit. Of course it’s fine for him to lie down with his clothes on.

You carry on rubbing your clothes on public loos at every opportunity and stripping naked on your doorstep love, the rest of us will just be being normal over here.

Yes! My OH puts suitcases on beds too. Absolutely gross. Those wheels have been dragged through god knows what on the streets of London.

He is right. The only reason I would change would be for comfort but it sounds like the pain was too intense to even change for that.

I'm going to make a wild guess here that you've never had a wisdom tooth extracted OP? It's not fun! Poor bloke, in pain, exhausted, just wants to rest and gets an earful!

You actually called him "disgusting". That's an awful way to behave to a person you love doing something completely normal - just having a lie down!

If I go for a nap I might remove my jeans but that's for comfort, not some batshit idea about "germs".

Honestly you need to have a think about how odd this way of thinking is.

Being outside isn't inherently "dirty".

Ok maybe the Tube isn't the cleanest, but he's been in a car and shops. Whoop de doop.

He is.

its gross

rubbing against public loos

Who does this? 🤣

I'd be tucking him in, not having a go at him!

OP I totally understand where you coming from.
We never get in bed in the same clothes that we have been wearing outside and both me and my DP feel the same, think it would be gross. Dental practices may be clean however still somewhere where they work with people's saliva and blood on the daily.
However, if he was feeling unwell and didn't have the energy to change into pj's I would understand but would not like it under normal circumstances 🤮

I never sit on my bed with the clothes I've been wearing outside yuk!

Are you a sufferer of OCD because then I can understand your fear about possible germs on the bed linen.

I think that Covid has affected the mental health of many people and turned some people’s mild concerns into serious germ phobias which shouldn’t be mocked or ignored.

Would you consider getting some professional help to reduce your anxiety over germs and what’s an ok level of cleanliness?

I agree with your DH but my DF would have agreed with you.
It's nice you're going to apologise. Ignore the arses trying to put the boot in. MN is inundated with them atm

So's inside. So are human beings, come to that.

You don't think the dentist chair will get a wipe down if there's been "saliva and blood"??? Do you know how much time HCP in all settings spend cleaning these days???