Would you lie on your bed in the clothes you've been wearing all day?

[blueskyeve]

My dh got home from the dentist yesterday afternoon (he had a wisdom tooth taken out), he was in a bit of pain and discomfort so went to lie down. I went to check if he was ok/needed anything and saw he was lying on our bed fully clothed with the clothes he had on all day. I told him that was disgusting and could he remove them please, but he didn't understand why. He said (via text as he couldn't talk) 'But where have I been sat? The dentist? Where everything is famously clean?' That day he had also been sat in the car, been to the shops, taken our dc to school. If it was me I would always remove jeans etc. and put on pj's or clean leggings/joggers before lying on the bed.

Who is right?

Yes I would (and do) and wouldn’t think it was off at all but dog lies on the bed too.

What an odd thing to say. You know very little about my life. Maybe think before you say something like that.

Eh?

Clothes are fine, I have even slept in my clothes before on occasion (sediation after a wisdom too extraction is a perfect example of a time where its expectable).

I assume he took his shoes off but thats all I would expect.

I find people who seem to think their beds are sterile utterly bat shit, no matter what you wear, how often you change sheets or any other stupid rule you still sweat and shed the same... it still has the same amount of dust, bed bugs and bodily fluids in it.

If your so obsessed with germs that the though of a bus seat touching your clothes then touching your belongs causes you to have this over reaction the CBT could help you reduce your anxiety, fix relationships and resume a normal way a life.

Imagine having the head space for this kind of thing. MN is a parallel universe.

and saw he was lying on our bed fully clothed with the clothes he had on all day. I told him that was disgusting

Would it have been disgusting if he lay on the settee or sat in an armchair in the clothes he's been out in?

And thats 100% not a normal thought pattern or way to live and one of the thought patterns i had to have years if therapy for.

Yes of course! I suppose as I've got older (and after Covid), I'm a bit more aware of germs etc. You aren´t going to catch anything from lying on the bed in clothes that have been outdoors. Even the whole thing about fomite transmission of covid (touching things and catching it that way) was debunked a loooong time ago.
It´s very ott to change your clothes when you get home because of "germs". Hugely unsympathetic to a man who had just had a wisdom teeth out too.

Of course. You can nicely ask because it bothers you (we have lots of ND in the family so lots of these conversations!) but you need to acknowledge it’s not a normal request at all.

and saw he was lying on our bed fully clothed with the clothes he had on all day. I told him that was disgusting this is just weird.

Maybe report your dentist if they arent wiping down the chair before each new patient.

It makes you heave?? Why? Is sitting on your sofa not the same, I honestly don't get it.

YANBU. I had a difficult wisdom tooth removal a while ago, it's painful but I was never that inflicted that I couldn't take my clothes off when going into bed.

wearing clothes in bed that have been worn all day whilst out and about is disgusting.

my Dp has lay on the top of the quilt after work. He works around glue and oil etc, drives me mad. He knows not to now 😅

I definitely would have changed clothes but I think anyone that doesn't instantly swap to pj's or comfy lounge wear as soon as they get home are weird lol I can't relax in "outside" clothes .. people that in jeans for example, like why?

Also, genuinely interested in what you think would happen OP.

Do you allow sex in or on your bed? It's pretty messy really!

What difference does it make, do you lick the bedclothes when you sleep.

I really enjoy the feeling of a clean bed and bedsheets and it's something I look forward to when getting in bed and by no means have a germ phobia or wash them daily or my mental health is affected by it 😂 maybe it's a cultural thing, I grew up with my parents only getting on/in bed with pj's and wouldn't have it any other way. Don't get why people take it so personal or think we are crazy and have the need to be so unkind in their comments!

Calling someone you love "disgusting" (or their actions) is hardly "making a comment"

Yes, but we usually do it unclothed. 😜

YABU
The obsessive germophobia on MN is really not healthy

You missed poo crumbs

By the way, you anti germ people should never read up about the amount of bacteria that are on you

I read a while back on an American blog someone proudly announcing that they had made their body and home 'germ free.' I thought, 'do I have some bad news for you...'

What on earth do you think is going to happen? It’s not a known cause of death in any medical journal I’ve ever read (and I’ve read a quite a few in my time).

"Guess I'm in the wrong then. I'd better go and apologise to him."

Thats that's probably the most mature, rational response I've ever seen on AIBU.

I live on a different planet to mumsnet. There's nothing wrong with being on or indeed in your bed wearing day clothes. I'm assuming he hasn't been rolling in fox shit?