To refuse to get rid of the dog.

[Alfredo674]

My DH wants to get rid of our dog. At this stage I don't think he cares if she is rehomed, goes to a shelter or is put down.

She is a 13 year old terrier cross and up until a few months ago she was having a lot of issues with diarrhoea and causing a lot of mess in the house. We have very young DC and I put measures in place to try and sort her tummy problems (consulted a vet, changed her food, she now sleeps in a crate overnight so she is contained) and for the past few months her stomach has been better although she vomits intermittently.

This morning she had pooed in the crate but it had spilled out on to the floor, so whilst he sorted the DC for nursery I had to clean up this huge mess whilst I should have been expressing milk before my newborn twins woke up.

He says the dog has to go, so as not to drip feed we had another elderly dog previously that I refused to get put down despite massive incontinence issues and dementia, when he finally went it was such a relief. DH says he won't go through it again. In fairness he is the one who walks her although we are struggling to get her walked everyday at the moment.

Despite all of this I'm still very much of the opinion that a dog is a life long commitment. AIBU?

With regards to my older dog, I'm pretty certain I won't be the only person who kept an old dog going longer than I should have because I loved him and didn't want to put him down, in hindsight I know now that I should have done it sooner but it's difficult to make that decision at the time

It looks very much like you're in danger of doing the same thing again.

Please consider having your dog put down op. Can you imagine having diarrhoea and vomiting every day. She must be in a lot of discomfort and even pain. She is very old. The vet will try and fob you off with lots of expensive tests but the truth is unspecified problems like this are common in older dogs. This was my old terrier and I wish I had put her down sooner as it think she had pain at the end. Don’t forget that terriers are extremely good at masking pain. She should not be walked if she has d and v. Please do right by her and put her down.

Yes dogs are a life long commitment and rehoming them or putting them down because they are old is despicable if they are still reasonably healthy. But if they have lost their quality of life due to health conditions that the vet can't do anything for and they are suffering then you really need to let them go.

That is an old dog nearing the end of her life. Developing those symptoms in old age almost certainly means she has some cancer or other terminal condition ; apart from the mess she will be feeling pain and very unwell. Don't make her suffer for months.

The kindest thing you can do for the dog is to have her put down by the vet. It's painless and causes no distress to the dog. We have always had the vet come to the house for that last loving service, so the dog is perfectly calm and relaxed in familiar surroundings.

Don't keep an old moribund the dog suffering pain and distress, with no remaining quality of life, just because YOU feel miserable about hving it PTS. I made that mistake with my first dog, but never again. Do the kindest and most merciful thing because you love your old friend.

if the d&v can’t be sorted then having it PTS would be the fairest option. You can’t have babies crawling around a house where a dog has crapped.

Yea and also remember if she's in pain she's more likely to snap if the children pester her.

Is your dog on a prescription diet? My rescue had bowel issues & I wish I’d got him on this sooner as it would’ve aced so much stress & angst.

I think your vet needs to do proper exploratory tests to rule in/out bowel diseases & others & are fobbing you off.

Once they know the cause then they can prescribe the correct diet & or treatment.

Has your dog’s bowel habits always been like this or is it recent??

You DH cannot be allowed to give up on this poor dog regardless of how challenging it is.

Please change vets if you’re not getting answers.

You DH cannot be allowed to give up on this poor dog regardless of how challenging it is.

The dog isn't challenging, he's a risk. Because of the range of health risks associated with children encountering dog poo, and (as a pp mentioned but I'd forgotten) the risk of the dog biting if he's in pain. If it's a short term problem then get it fixed. If it's a long term one then the dog should be removed from the house because the children deserve a safe home.

Anyone who puts their pet above the health of their children is a bad parent.

Nothing wrong with overnight crating.

It’s very hard for elderly dogs with health issues to be successfully rehomed unfortunately :( some kind souls take this on but not many do.

I do believe that a dog is for life; they do get old and smelly and Ill, just like we do. But we look after those we love through the good times and the bad.

personally I think it would be kinder to pts than rehome. Your dog then will know only the home they have always had, and won’t be Left confused Ill and alone to die in a kennel

Sometimes the health of rescue dogs, particularly from overseas, is permanently damaged by the terrible treatment they had before rescue. I have to say when I read your post, I thought your husband sounded distressed that he couldn’t see another dog suffer, not that he wanted to ‘get rid’ because of the mess and inconvenience. This doesn’t sound like a little bit of an upset stomach to me. Find a good vet and have a hard conversation with them.

Nothing wrong with overnight crating until the poor dog is shitting and vomiting in its crate and being stuck there until its lets out.

Nothing wrong with overnight crating until the poor dog is shitting and vomiting in its crate and being stuck there until its lets out.

Well that's the thing isn't it?

I've slept downstairs with our dog if I was worried he might need the toilet in the night.

Admittedly I didn't have very young kids then though.

Sensitive tummy doesn't really translate to me as pooing overnight though.

Generally they'll go to the toilet on the usual walks won't they?

Whilst it's horrible to see our furry friends suffer two things struck me about your posts: the first was that you admit you had another elderly dog that you kept alive for longer than was kind; the second, that you admit you have difficulty walking the dog NOT because it is unwell but because you can't fit the time in.

Both these suggest that you have difficulty in responding to your dogs' needs - why is that?

ALL dogs are good at masking pain, especially daily ongoing pain.
It seems to be a survival mechanism so other dogs don’t pick on them.
We have to watch animals to see how they are coping on a daily basis to see if they are in pain.
Lack of eating, reluctance to move freely, hiding under things to get out of the way- eg under tables.

Your husband is not a lovely person. A dog is for life, not just until you’re stressed out with children. If my partner had that attitude, he’d be out the door. Poor dog.

I think you need another vet visit and it needs to consider your dog's emotional as well as physical condition. If there's nothing physically wrong/ treatable then it may be as someone suggested upthread that the dog is reacting to the household upheaval caused by the new babies. If you're going for a second opinion I'd suggest a veterinary behaviourist who will be able to cover all angles. If you're already satisfied there's nothing physically wrong then you could try food supplements to calm the digestive system. Vince the Vet does some very effective ones and will also do an online consultation.

This may not be fixable in such an elderly dog, in which case the best solution for everyone may be PTS, but I don't think you're quite in a position to know that yet.

Apologies if this has been posted upthread - in a rush. As a lifelong animal lover, who once let a dog continue for longer than I should have done, I hope you might find the below helpful. (Sorry - link won't post so please Google.)

Use This Quality of Life Scale to Decide When to Put Your Dog Down

Infographic: Use This Quality of Life Scale to Decide When to Put Your Dog Down
As your dog ages and their health declines, it can be difficult to figure out when it's the right time to put your dog down.

The Quality of Life Scale allows you to evaluate your dog’s well-being to help you make difficult end-of-life care decisions. Originally known as the HHHHHMM Scale, this evaluation tool was created by Dr. Alice Villalobos, DVM, founder of Pawspice—a quality of life program for terminal pets—as a scoring system for a pet’s life quality.

The scale gives you tangible ways to measure your pet’s appetite, mobility, energy and pain levels, and overall well-being.

You can take this form to your vet to help you assign a score to each area. This will give you a more objective picture of your pet’s quality of life.

Use this Quality of Life Scale to evaluate your dog every day and mark your pup’s score on a calendar to keep track of their good and bad days. Then your vet can help you decide what type of care your pet needs or if it’s best for your pet to let them go.

End-of-life decisions are excruciatingly difficult, but the Quality of Life Scale can help you work with your veterinarian to make sure you are making the best decision for your dog.

@FacebookPhotos Anyone who puts their pet above the health of their children is a bad parent.

this. So many people saying to keep the dog at all costs, even if it is to the detriment of their children's safety.

I think it all boils down to the dog's quality of life. Does he have quality of life or not? If he's suffering he needs to be PTS. If he seems to be enjoying enjoying life despite his issues then I'd keep him alive. I'd get a second opinion though. I think rehoming him late in life is cruel.

I get rid of him before the dog, he’s sounds awful !

Op said her dog shit the crate to the point it spilled out all over the floor.

The dog is old. Terriers life spans are generally 12-16 at a push. Ops dog is 13 and suffering persistent health problems spanning months. Stop saying a dog is for life when this dog is heading to the end of its natural life span ffs.

Op said her dog shit the crate to the point it spilled out all over the floor.

Yes I know!

Sorry think i misread your post, i thought you meant the op would stay with the dog and it wouldn't shit the crate for some reason. 🤣