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Original poster

Scared sh*tless of death

132 replies

Lordhelpme · 19/09/2022 17:03

I don't know if iv done this right as I'm first time poster so forgive me BUT...
Is anyone else scared of death? I feel silly to be scared as its going to happen but i can't seem to accept that it will eventually happen and I don't know when, not that I want to know when. I was never like this before covid I had the attitude of 'well its going to happen so?' Where as now I'm having bloody panic attacks about it. Maybe because I have 2 little ones I'm not sure but it's the whole knowing thats it, done, never going to see them or my partner again.
Any advice would be great..

OP posts:
Suzi888 · 19/09/2022 17:16

I’m not afraid of death but I’m afraid of how I’ll die.

A friend of mine has what you describe, she would fear going out, that something bad would happen etc. I think it’s called ‘catastrophising’. She had some medication from her G.P for awhile. Sorry to not be much help, hope someone can come along soon with more knowledge.

KingCharlespen · 19/09/2022 17:20

If you have little ones it's sensible to make preparations for them so you have peace of mind. Beyond that we all have to accept that death is the only certainty but try and keep ourselves as well and in the present as possible.

Tromboleese · 19/09/2022 17:20

No. I am not afraid at all. It is like the period before you were born, when you’re dead you don’t know you’re dead, it is just sad for others.
I won’t be there annoyed I have missed stuff, I just won’t be anything anymore.

33goingon64 · 19/09/2022 17:23

Having just watched my DM go through 9 months of knowing she was going to die from a brain tumour, and facing it with such bravery, such determination to think positively, total lack of self pity and accepting the life she'd lived was enough and there were no regrets... I don't think I will be scared of death. I'll just think of her example and hope to follow it.

Figgygal · 19/09/2022 17:23

Yes absolutely it's incomprehensible
I have a physical reaction to the thought of it so have to ignore
Almost wish I had the comfort of faith but I dont

MomwasCasual · 19/09/2022 17:26

The actual moment of death will be like going to sleep, or being put under general anaesthetic.

As for not being here any more, well you weren't here before you were born but we don't fret for that.

I do occasionally have wobbly moments about it, but I take comfort from the fact that all of the elderly people I've known have been quite comfortable with the thought of death. I think life prepares you for it.

Mummadeze · 19/09/2022 17:27

I worry but the way I cope is to block it out of my head by fantasising about good things. Like winning the lottery, going on holiday. If I let myself dwell, I feel awful, panicky, sick. Only because of my DD, if I didn’t have her it wouldn’t be an issue. I am really strict with myself about negative thoughts. Block block block! But I do totally understand how you feel.

ReadtheReviews · 19/09/2022 17:28

I suppose I just think who knows what happens after death, maybe nothing, maybe something. We're just clever hairless apes who don't really know anything about how or why any of this is here in the first place so it's a bit arrogant to pretend we do. Anything's possible.
What I hate is having regrets. Try not to have those op.

Jadetreesbringluck · 19/09/2022 17:28

Yes! All the time. I also worry about other people dying. It's scary!

Hawkins001 · 19/09/2022 17:28

Personally I want immortality,
That said, when death does take my soul, at least I'll be at peace

MessyBunPersonified · 19/09/2022 17:30

I'm not afraid of death at all.

I've been through far worse tbh.

Death is just going back to what you were before birth, and I can't remember that.

I don't want to waste my life worrying about the inevitable either.

Carpy88999 · 19/09/2022 17:30

You can't experience non existence so you're worrying about something thatwill never happen to you. Of course you will die, we all do but you wont know anything about it. Death gives life meaning so do the best you can with the time you're given.

Hadalifeonce · 19/09/2022 17:33

When I thought I was dying, I was surprised at how at peace I felt. I was sad about how my family would feel; but it has meant I am not afraid to die.

Ilovemycatalot · 19/09/2022 17:37

Life can be a living hell for some so unless your living this fantastic life I don’t think there is much to fear. All you can hope is it’s a peaceful death and you don’t suffer much before you die. And the ones you love come to terms with it.

Retrievemysanity · 19/09/2022 17:40

I know what you mean but really, worrying about it is such a waste of time. My brother died in his 20’s and almost overnight I suddenly stopped worrying because I thought I just need to make the most of life because he has got that option anymore.

EllietheElephanti · 19/09/2022 17:41

I find it odd that people who are so important in our lives can suddenly just be gone.

I hate the thought of not being here for my DC. And also fear for my parents as I don't think they would cope well.

DH would be fine!

Plump82 · 19/09/2022 17:41

I'm so frightened of dying but more about leaving my husband and my nieces. Not the actual dying. Although I also fear being terminally ill after watching my dad die of cancer.

DillDanding · 19/09/2022 17:41

I watched my dad die recently. He absolutely raged against the dying of the light, there was no peace nor acceptance. Nothing about the experience was reassuring.

It should make me fear death, but what’s the point? Just make the most of the time you have alive.

RomeoOscarXrayIndigoEcho · 19/09/2022 17:46

I'm absolutely bloody terrified of death. Have been since my mum died when I was 8.

I'm envious of those with faith.

I also find that the vastness of space and time can set off my death fear.

I've developed loads of coping strategies- one of which is being the best person I can be.

nancydroo · 19/09/2022 17:46

Find a religion, that helps prepare for death. I'm not religious but brought up in religion. So unfortunately for me I can't buy into it myself but think people with faith are likely to have better deaths and comforted at the end.

Somethingsnappy · 19/09/2022 17:47

Are your dc very young op? It's just that you said you were OK with the idea up until quite recently. Has the turning point been the birth of your children? You did mention covid, but I wasn't sure if that were just a point of reference for time passing.

LuckyLil · 19/09/2022 17:47

I'm not scared of it. I don't want to go yet, I'd like to live longer of course and know I can't live forever but I don't want it to be yet.

TimBoothseyes · 19/09/2022 17:52

I've never admitted this irl but here goes

I am absolutely terrified at the thought of dying. It gets to the point at times where I don't sleep in case I never wake up. I realise this is not normal behaviour but it doesn't stop me from doing it. It's worse when I'm told about somebody who died in their sleep.

PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog · 19/09/2022 17:55

I'm more terrified of becoming old and infirm in this country tbh.

Losinghope9 · 19/09/2022 17:56

It terrifies me. If I think about it I'll have a genuine panic attack. Makes me feel sick. I think it's because it's the inevitable. It's going to happen and there is nothing I can do. And that's so scary.

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