My neighbors...

[neighbourcrazy]

Hey all, am i being unreasonable? we live in a nice area, houses were not expensive, but that is to give context. We live in a detached residence, all other neighbors are semi-d.
So, not sure what is going on. One neighbour rents, others are owners. We got on reasonably well with all neighbors, we have a baby who is less than 2 years old.
During the summer, there was a basketball hoop placed outside on the public space, we live in a cul de sac, so it was in an awkward place but we let it go. However, the basketball was being played day and late into evening. My little girl needs to have her naps and I work from home. I asked the neighbors (the 2 different parents of the kids who were playing basketball (aged between 10-16)) could they ask kids to not play after 7 pm in evening due to sleep time for my baby. I am the only one with a baby. I was received with bitterness and intimidation by one set of parents, nothing said but extremely intimidating behaviour like staring in my window while walking past etc. I dont usually let things get to me as I do believe their behaviour is more about them than me. So I let it slide.
Now the other parents who obliged to the 7 pm cut off, have stopped bringing in my bins, they bring in all the other neighbors bins but leave ours outside, this has been a few weeks. Again, I don't really care but can someone explain to me what the heck is going on? Was I really being unreasonable asking for the noise to stop at 7pm? It was non stop all day which i didnt mind but night time for my baby is important. I'd like to hear opinions please.

Why should other people's children not be allowed to play outside to suit? Take the basketball net out of the equation. If they were playing out on the green full stop after a certain time would you still ask their parents not to let them play on the green? If so then I hate to say it but you are possibly being if not unreasonable then certainly unrealistic. The rest of society is not going to tip toe around because you have a baby I'm afraid.

If you insist that everybody is quiet when your baby sleeps (almost 2 years old is not a baby any more), you do realise this will also apply to your child, when in a few years they want to play outside and maybe make some noise? I'm sure there are neighbours with smaller babies who want to nap, people who want to have peace and quiet at lunch/dinner time, Very Important Men on zoom calls all day etc etc. 7 is not socially unacceptable time to make moderate noise.

Your asking too much, children should be free to play out until dark, in summer hols etc - that means late. Your not the first parent with a baby to experience this, and yours will adapt just fine too! :o)
Your thoughts on this will change as your becomes older and is playing out
(This is why im glad I have no neighbours lol)

Basket ball is bloody awful, during summer all I heard was thump, thump, thump. If it went on for half the night I'd murder somebody.
Luckily my neighbour is the sharp one and goes out and tells them to shut the hell up before we all go mad.

I’m with you here OP, I would not want kids playing outside my house day & night. Everyone else probably thinks the same, but the scene is set on MN just as soon as one person says YABU. As for your neighbours, they’re just jealous of your detached.

hahaha, you want all outside noise to stop for your child's bedtime. Surely you can see that's ridiculous OP? Once your child is a little older perhaps you will realise the world doesn't revolve around toddlers.

I feel like people really can’t win here. So many people telling the OP she’s being unreasonable, but if it was the other way round and someone was saying that they want their kids to play out and disturb the street, they’d likely also be told they’re being unreasonable, what about people who work shifts and people who want to enjoy their gardens without the noise of basketballs etc

But that's just living in society. You can't get life around you to stop entirely. People make noise. Some of it is antisocial. Some teenagers doing sports within reasonable hours during the summer is hardly that. People are not entitled to complete stillness to "enjoy" their gardens. If they need that they ought to move somewhere very remote.

To sum up the previous 160 post and the next 160 to save you reading them all

OP - you are being unreasonable.

You asked - pretty much everyone thinks you are.

It just might might be why your neighbours are a bit passive aggressive pissedoff with you.

Common denominator being you. And your unreasonableness.

If it's not your PFB then what on earth were you like with your first?

I’m with you here OP, I would not want kids playing outside my house day & night.

Definitely don't buy a house in a cul de sac then. It will be full of kids.

YANBU

These kids are playing ALL DAY so there’s a constant thud thud of the damn ball in addition to the ball hitting your windows etc.

How people on here think that’s reasonable is beyond me. Whatever happened to consideration for others?

Yes kids play outside, but everyone has their limits and it is not fair to expect others to consistently put up with this constant noise when there are other games those kids could play, that don’t involve them bouncing a ball around for 7+ hours a day! Bit of balance is all that’s required.

Clearly your neighbours are as entitled as some folk on here and have their arse in their hands.

Actually this is a common misconception.

If you are causing a disturbance with noise at ANY time of the day, then you can be given an abatement order for noise nuisance.

From the gov website:

Councils can investigate complaints of statutory nuisance to tackle noise produced at any time of day or night.

They do also have powers to investigate and prosecute for Noise at Night as an additional issue, but noise nuisance is not only restricted to 11pm- 7am.

Some babies will sleep through anything and some wont.

For your families benefit you put baby in the room they best sleep in.

Balls in your yard or hitting your house... if course that's not ok but if they aren't on your property you need to adapt and not expect the world to adapt to you.

Well I very much doubt it’s going on all day because the children are now back at school.

Obviously the ball shouldn’t be hitting OP’s car and windows, but that’s very odd for a basketball as they aren’t lobbed or kicked about like a football would be 🤔

however… a baby… under the age of 2? Doesn’t sound like a baby to me.

If you read the OP’s original post she says “during the summer”. And that it went on all day, well into the evening. The incidents happened back then and she has since been dealing with the fall out.

There are also still weekends kids can do this, despite being back at school.

Basketballs can bounce high and far. I used to play the game myself. So can easily hit a car. And could easily hit the OP’s windows if the hoop is located close to her home.

Kids should be able to play outside, it’s good for them and they need to burn off all that energy they’re full of. But there should absolutely be a balance.

Having the basketball hoop in the street for a start isn’t the best idea. It may be a cul-de-sac but there are still cars coming and going.

Allowing a load of kids to bounce a ball in the street for hours upon hours a day isn’t fair on others who live there. Play for a couple of hours then play something else. Like I said - bit of balance.

So you want all the neighbors to respect your baby sleep time. But not respecting their kids after school playtime. I believe that it's disturbing your baby with the noise. But I seriously doubt that the balls are hitting your windows, doors or even getting in your garden. You didn't come up with that defense until you had nobody agreeing with you. So you make a suggestion for their kids not to play outside after 7:00pm. So why would they continue to do you a favor by bringing in your bins. Can't have it both ways.

You have done a very silly thing.

Buy a noise machine for your baby's room or move her to the back of the house.

Buy noise canceling headphones for working.

Apologise to your neighbours. Their teens need a chance for recreation and basketball is so much better than a lot of other stuff they might get into. It's not easy to find wholesome activities close to home for teens, especially teen boys.

YABU!!! Extremely!!! Go ahead and report some children between the ages of 10-16 playing basketball (IDC if it is in the public space) bc I’m positive the children move when a car comes by…I would bet my last $$$ they don’t stand there and block what few cars come by. The police would laugh there asses off and my wish would be for them to write you a ticket for wasting their time because, after all, you are in a CUL DE SAC!!! “OBSTRUCTION TO PUBLIC ROADWAY”…ummm, no! You are way off on that one, so I’d like you to go ahead and try it and then update us here LMAO! Also, you, as a Mother, should have gotten your baby used to noises from the very beginning and you would not have found your self in this predicament. If some children playing basketball…in the street…away from your house…wakes your baby, then that’s a YOU PROBLEM and YOU need to solve it.

Idk about where you are but in USA only after 7AM - 10pm can you make a noise complaint about kids playing . Why are you coming here asking for"advice" and then getting mad when ppl disagree. You're wrong to think you can tell kids they can't make noise at 7 pm because you have a baby. And now you think you can call police because they have a basketball hoop on public property. OMG lady. You're getting out of hand, notice you called it public property

If you always act as defensive and standoffish in real life as you're acting here, then I think it's pretty clear why your neighbours aren't talking to you. Your baby ought to learn to sleep through a bit of noise anyway.

I agree OP - your neighbours sound awful. People who are saying this is fine clearly like to behave like your neighbours - they might be the ones other people complain about with loud jacuzzi parties, outdoor bars and karaoke in the garden. What they might consider fun until midnight isn't what you or I would... You are not going to enjoy that neighbourhood, I'd move. Then report them!

Gawd OP, you sound like an utter brat! No wonder your neighbours aren't doing anything for you anymore after your shitty attitude. If you had told me or my kids to stop making noise at 7pm, especially during the summer, I would have told you to fuck right off to the other side of fuck and once there, fuck off some more! Either you shut up and accept the situation or you appreciate some of the well meaning advice.

I find it real funny, people will be like so what its kids playing, they have been playing for many hours screaming, shouting whilst they are playing...yet that's is perfectly okay. Yet if its someone playing music for the same amount of time its selfish etc.

Noise is noise and can be irritating as fuck esp if its been going on for hours on end.

Bit like my neighbours who think coming out at 7am in the morning and chatting loudly actually I call it shouting all day long is perfectly okay. No u fucktwat id like to enjoy my garden too.

I’m at the end of a cul de sac. Definitely not full of kids. Lovely and peaceful actually