Child’s birthday party - accidentally invited the class horror

[MyToasterHatesMe]

My little one has a party today. They’ve just started school and we didn’t want to invite all the kids so party invites were a bit of a grab-bag of nursery friends, kids that he seemed to get on with, parents I chatted to etc. Now we’re a week in I’m getting the feeling that one of the kids is pretty poorly behaved - runs out of class at home time rather than waiting to be called, has tried to pick my (not small!) child up when they were queuing up and carried on when asked not to, hit him repeatedly. Mine seems to like playing with him but says that he suddenly hits, pushes etc. He’s not totally wild and the parents seem on it (I think?) - plus it’s all new being at school and I can imagine that affects behaviour.

Anyway - there’s nothing too structured at the party but if this kid starts hitting / crashing into the food table / being unpleasant - what do I actually do? A parent will be there - how do I politely say that they need to make it stop? Help!

@Thatboymum I'm in the same situation as you, 4 year old ds, adhd.
Your comment has given me some hope.

Good grief, this is so ableist it’s almost laughable, if it wasn’t so cruel. Would you honestly write “
you give in to your child’s legs that won’t work, by allowing them to sit in a wheelchair” your post actually stunned me…. How far you have to grow to understand autism is a disability and @lollipoprainbow
is responding to that disability, or as some prefer to term difference, in the exact way they should.
Are you a troll? Because you antagonising ableist trash suggests so?

@TyFly wow just breathtaking, what a thoroughly nasty person you are.

@Acreativeusername clearly a troll, no decent person would write something so downright nasty about an autistic child.

Hardly nasty

You're posting a woe is me story

But leaving out there is a reason your child isn't invited to stuff and that reason is you and the fact you don't respect other peoples rules in their homes. You think your child should be allowed upstairs and don't understand why they can't make allowances

@tyfly wow! Now that is desperate!

@TyFly no you're laughable, bringing up my previous posts, are you stalking me??

I can only assume they haven't read @lollipoprainbow 's previous posts

As they were ridiculous

Never seen so many YABU's on a post

How embarrassing they're posting on this moaning about their DD not being invited to things when it was pointed out why on her last thread

@SapphireBlusher and @TyFly. Cut out the bullying.

Not stalking

I remember posting on it when it came up

So was bemused to see you still moaning on here when you had your bottom handed to you over your behaviour last time

Hardly desperate

I take it you didn't read her previous post and are therefore choosing to make yourself look like a tit

There were 500+ YABUs on her thread

She doesn't think it's fair for her DD to be asked not to go upstairs because she just loves stairs

And wonders why she isn't invited round for play dates

Baffling

@TyFly you're the tit here dredging up my old thread in someone else's utterly bizarre !! You know nothing about me or my child and clearly sod all about autism.

@lollipoprainbow 🙌 re the stairs . So great that you have educated your self to be your child’s advocate to support them to regulate potentially overwealming experiences ❤️ So great that you recognise the calming value of an autistic child accessing their obsessions / topics of interest. Stair climbers welcome 🤗

Just ignore them and their ignorant, bullying behaviour. Rise above it. Whatever they thought about your old thread, this is not the place to bring it up and use it as an excuse to attack you and your opinions. Awful behaviour. And for what it's worth, I remember that thread too, and you also had a lot of supportive comments from people with a better/more in depth understanding of SEN, autism in particular.

Just ignore them, and hopefully they'll move on x

Thanks @Somethingsnappy @Acreativeusername xx

Sorry, it’s taken me this long to come down from my birthday cake high / actually check my phone. He was pretty badly behaved, for whoever asked. Caused tears a few times by playing very roughly or dangerously (eg child on balance beam, this one came along and pushed them off from quite a height - luckily it was supervised), trying to push over goal posts etc. I’d say an incident every ten minutes or so. Clearly also very intelligent, just needs constant supervision. Not sure what the lesson is.

All over now then! Big sigh of relief and a cup of tea is in order...

Oh no! Hope it didn’t spoil your sons day, I would just avoid any further invites if that’s how the child behaves, lesson learnt.

Sorry to hear his behaviour was as it was expected to be

At least you know for the next time not to invite him!

At least it gives you something to gossip about at the school gate. While some kid is struggling socially and his mums heart breaks watching him struggle while you all get to stand around in judgemental

What is with the projection on this thread

Goodness me, it's like the horror children of the worlds parents have all congregated on this post

At least it gives you something to gossip about at the school gate. While some kid is struggling socially and his mums heart breaks watching him struggle while you all get to stand around in judgemental

Um… thanks, I guess? Mine goes to a childminder after school so I’ll need to ask her if she can throw some shade at the poor sod.

@pickledpotato my son would have behaved in a similar way. Hes not a horror child - he is a child who has survived early childhood trauma, physical abuse, and several suicide attempts of his birth mother whilst pregnant - all of which affect the level of stress hormones in his body. He CANNOT be calm.

So yes, like PP, my heart breaks every day knowing how much he struggles socially and I'm so bloody grateful that the school mums in our lives are a lot less judgemental than many on here.

So, as stated

Projection

Your child is the class horror and are projecting on this post.

It doesn't matter the reason for the behaviour, if it's disruptive people will judge, you just won't always know about it