I know it's not reasonable to kill a robin but wtf do I do?

[dancemonke]

I have a robin who thinks it lives in my house. If I open any of the windows at all, it flies in and then (if I am in, which I am a lot because I wfh) it panics and flies around shitting everywhere. I am so so so over it. What do I do? I love fresh air and like having my windows, but it just comes straight in and I keep finding bird poo all over the place and I have a one and a three year old and I don't want crap all over the place. This morning, I caught it and chucked it out - and I actually just want to kill it now. I know it sounds silly, but I hate having random bird poo everywhere (it stains the carpets, it's GROSS). Is there anyway of humanely convincing it that it doesn't live here? (Yes, I've googled and I know about the fact that it's a sign of approaching death, which doesn't improve my mood.)

Catch it and give it to a long distance lorry driver

I think you are mistaken- it is now the robin’s house. You must serve him, or move.

I keep chuckling imagining you dropping it off several miles away. Then you arrive home and there it is, sitting on the window ledge tapping his watch 😆

Is that what they are? Aren't they gorgeous?

I want to see the hedgehog too...

I don't live in hedgehog country so will live vicariously through this thread.

In return I can see if I can get a picture of of the murderous rock pigeon. It's quite huge, well for a pigeon anyway. But he definitely isn't cute... Imo.

If you mean my hedgehog I posted a photo a bit further up. I would love to see the rock pigeon. 😂

Nooooo 😮😱

Robins are very territorial.
When I go into my garden, the robin checks me out.
I am an invader in his / her garden.

Please don't bring it far away.
Just put a screen up. No big deal.

Just tell it to go bob bob bobbin’ along.

One guy got old coins brought back to him. Maybe you will get some rare coins you never know!

Get a sparrow with a bow and arrow...

Love this 😂

How could you even consider killing a robin?

And how would you even do it?

How long do robins live? Keep the windows shut until it dies naturally

We are not actually superior.

You wont have to live behind screening indefinitely. They don't live forever. If you just put up screens for a few months over winter it will have probably died anyway.

Ooh sorry, I scrolled back and saw him. What a great picture!

I will have bad pigeon in my sights tomorrow, and ill make the guy famous....

I have a foster hedgehog staying over in my spare bedroom at the mo - will send photos for snacks 😆

I think you're being unreasonable to live in what is quite clearly the robin's house. Your only clear course of action is to move your family to a bowl made of twigs perched in a hedge.

Put up window netting obviously.

I doesnt cost much to put up a net, no idea where your getting hundreds of pounds from.

YABU to complain about flying things entering your home while you have all your windows open and have put up zero barriers... like what do you expect?

I will come and take him, he can live here with me

🤣

Maybe get a scarecrow op?

Shameless birdbased place marking! My only bird related anecdotes are:
Aged 13 I brought a wet pigeon home on a bus, and was fuming when my mum wouldn't let it in the house

DCat brought home a magpie released in the conservatory and DH was terrified so I manhandled it into a cat carrier, and released it, but it was pouring rain and gloomy so I looked like a crazed egor figure flinging something from a cat box out by the local fort...

Birds!

NC as definitely outing!
It could be worse, you could have this fucker to contend with. He shits all over the drive, waddles into the house to eat the cat food, and starts keening right outside my bedroom window at 5am. He lives in a lovely house and garden next door so I have no idea why he is obsessed with us. He literally spends the entire day staring into my windows.
Now he isnt even scared of me anymore. When I walk towards him clapping my hands he comes towards me. He stalks me around the garden too with his scary claws.

We had a peacock stalker when we lived in Hampshire, then we moved to a tiny village in West Sussex and guess what. Also peacock!

@Dinoburd if we lived in the same village did there used to be two, and does the survivor take shelter under the awning at the Spar shop when it rains?

Here he is, being in the way.