I know it's not reasonable to kill a robin but wtf do I do?

[dancemonke]

I have a robin who thinks it lives in my house. If I open any of the windows at all, it flies in and then (if I am in, which I am a lot because I wfh) it panics and flies around shitting everywhere. I am so so so over it. What do I do? I love fresh air and like having my windows, but it just comes straight in and I keep finding bird poo all over the place and I have a one and a three year old and I don't want crap all over the place. This morning, I caught it and chucked it out - and I actually just want to kill it now. I know it sounds silly, but I hate having random bird poo everywhere (it stains the carpets, it's GROSS). Is there anyway of humanely convincing it that it doesn't live here? (Yes, I've googled and I know about the fact that it's a sign of approaching death, which doesn't improve my mood.)

I think this is my most favourite thread ever! 😀

Same!
I hope you know how lucky you are thunderhoney, and how sweet to have your kindness reflected back at you via old bits of candle and other shinies.

@DameHelena She is in my garden right now with one of her babies eating dinner. Or rather she is eating and baby has to wait as usual..

What sort of crows are those?

@TheSpottedZebra I treat the shiny things as the true treasures they are..

So envious!

@ClumpingBambooIsALie don’t know, grey crows..? The most common ones where I live.

Can you catch it & take it to the park?

Ah — I'm not familiar with them. But they're adorable 😍

🤣🤣🤣

When our hedgehog (later hedgehog with it’s baby😂) turned up this summer the crows weren’t too happy with the competition for food.

Nooooo!

🤣🤣🤣

Just put a small mirror in your garden , OP

it will go bananas trying to kill its reflection there and will have no time for your windows

alternatively, catch it, put it in a little brown waistcoat, and when it sees its reflection in your window it will assume the ‘invader’ is a harmless chaffinch and ignore it

I am now here for the crow/hedghehog pictures! @thunderhoney are you a Disney princess by any chance?

OK, inow wantmto be thunderhoney and have her menagerie.

Them there crows are hooded crows! Are you in Northern Scotland or Ireland? Or Disneyland?

You could dress up as a scarecrow.

Haha! I wish. Just a garden with birdbaths in different heights.

@TheSpottedZebra I’m in Scandinavia. The mum crow was here all winter too, I shovelled little paths in the snow so she could hop along. Best fed crow in the neighbourhood. 😂

LTB

In the garden we have a pair of collared doves who definitely don’t belong to us but seem to think they do. They stare at us through the kitchen window. We call them Gavin and Stacey.

@thunderhoney I very much feel a childrens book coming on! Little injured crow having little snow tunnels carved for her! 🥹🥹🥹

I’ve got one of those in the Wisteria outside the window! Keeps trying to make a nest and ends up disappointed when all the twigs fall through the vines. Dumb as a box of toes that bird.

Still hooded crows then! Ornithologists have only relatively recently decided that they are a separate species to standard (carrion) crow and not just a local variation.

How adorable! What do you feed them? You've named them, haven't you? What are they called?

Not to highjack op’s thread but this is when the two baby crows were new to my garden and I guess had not yet learnt how to behave. But after feeding them they both one evening picked my (newly planted) flowers from the other end of the garden and put on my steps. Then they just sat there watching through my window. I actually could not believe it, it was so weird.

They’re paying you! Sorry OP but maybe all you can do is charge the robin rent?

Thank you, I did not know that. Interesting. Oh I feed them leftovers, or a meatball every now and again. The mum will be waiting on my grass and actually catch it! The babies are a bit shy still and not as fast. She is named Hoppie.