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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be sad that Queen has died but can't wait for the sycophancy to be over

406 replies

bedtimestoriesforbears · 08/09/2022 21:00

I am no royalist but like many in the same position I am truly moved by today's historical news

It is a "once in a lifetime" moment for many of us and I am going to admit that despite strong Republican views I surprised myself by being knocked sideways by news

Not that it wasn't expected and that the Queen hasn't had a good life but by the sheer magnitude of what is happening

However other threads seem to be dismissing the fact that we can feel both - sadness that an elderly individual who was "known" to all of us has died and an unwillingness to join in the "grief jamboree".

I feel like I did when Diana died - I am struggling to recognise the grief others are manifesting and the absolute deferential attitude present here

I feel like this will just build and build and we will be exhausted by end of it

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Hambledy · 08/09/2022 23:32

@TheMoth good point! All the people telling us how great it is for our immortal souls to be poor, for centuries, are silent on the subject of whether or not rich people do automatically meet a fiery fate, as cororally.

picklespark · 08/09/2022 23:37

You aren't unreasonable at all, OP. I accept her death has historical significance, but her legacy is that of propping up an empire that caused untold suffering to millions.

Not to mention I think it's a terrible time for this to happen. The country is in turmoil and this will only make it worse.

The sanctimonious twits telling people on this thread they're disrespectful should fuck off to one of the other threads wanking over the Queen. Lord knows there are enough of them.

MarshaMelrose · 08/09/2022 23:41

freckles20 · 08/09/2022 22:12

But the whole point is she pretty much had to stay- that's how the monarchy is supposed to work. She didn't get a choice, neither did we.

Maybe it's what she wanted, maybe not. She certainly did her duty.

Show quote history

Maybe she didn't want to. That makes her even more admirable in my eyes.

But what I meant was they were transient but she was a permanent fixture in my life so her loss makes me feel slightly less secure than I felt yesterday.

Namedifferentorquestion · 08/09/2022 23:45

There's a think on social media about Liz Truss bumping her off. She was anti monarchy in a post in the 90's and shakes her hand and what do you know -dead. There is a conspiracy that the government did it.

StoneofDestiny · 08/09/2022 23:48

This will go on for months!

To be sad that Queen has died but can't wait for the sycophancy to be over
TheMoth · 08/09/2022 23:49

Namedifferentorquestion · 08/09/2022 23:45

There's a think on social media about Liz Truss bumping her off. She was anti monarchy in a post in the 90's and shakes her hand and what do you know -dead. There is a conspiracy that the government did it.

She was 96. No one in my family ever made it that far. Don't think it's much of a leap to imagine that the chances of a96yr old dying in any given day are pretty high.

Hambledy · 08/09/2022 23:50

.. but on one particular day ...?? 🤔🤔🤔

Ahf22 · 08/09/2022 23:57

bedtimestoriesforbears · 08/09/2022 21:00

I am no royalist but like many in the same position I am truly moved by today's historical news

It is a "once in a lifetime" moment for many of us and I am going to admit that despite strong Republican views I surprised myself by being knocked sideways by news

Not that it wasn't expected and that the Queen hasn't had a good life but by the sheer magnitude of what is happening

However other threads seem to be dismissing the fact that we can feel both - sadness that an elderly individual who was "known" to all of us has died and an unwillingness to join in the "grief jamboree".

I feel like I did when Diana died - I am struggling to recognise the grief others are manifesting and the absolute deferential attitude present here

I feel like this will just build and build and we will be exhausted by end of it

So a whole 3 hours after the Queen’s death was publically announced, you’re having a whinge on here about wanting the “sycophancy” to stop? Nice.

Are you incapable of hiding posts you disagree with or steering clear of social media following what is effectively a major historical event? No patience to wait a day or so? FFSHmm

There is no “grief jamboree”. No-one is expecting you to join in or asking you to express your grief online.

”we will be exhausted by the end of it” LMAO. No wonder they say they don’t make them like the Queen anymore.

FanGurlll · 09/09/2022 00:05

I wish Mumsnet had a like button, so many posts here I agree with. I have found my people!

MrPlobby · 09/09/2022 00:13

I’m sad, a large part of which is because she lived so long so even though I’m not young she represented something constant in the background of my life while the foreground changed completely. That’s a very “me” centred sadness though. I hope she enjoyed her life.

Charles will be on the throne for a couple of decades at most (assuming he has the same good health as his parents) so the younger generation aren’t going to have the same sense of consistency. If the Monarchy makes it to William, he’ll probably be hitting 60 when he gets to the throne. That sense of stability which formed around the Queen’s physical presence isn’t going to be repeated. I have vague memories of stuff connected to the Silver Jubilee and we had a mug and silver bus still in its box for years which I assume was just in case it became a collector’s item one day. My DM passed away a couple of years ago and we’re still clearing out her house. I have no idea where that bus is.

CandyLeBonBon · 09/09/2022 03:12

Are you incapable of hiding posts you disagree with or steering clear of social media following what is effectively a major historical event? No patience to wait a day or so? FFS

Oh the irony!

freckles20 · 09/09/2022 03:54

FloorWipes · 08/09/2022 22:45

I think that some of the people who are getting quite angry about the news coverage/expressions of grief/changes to plans/reactions of other people etc. are actually experiencing and expressing their own form of grief. This is quite a big event - so it’s an understandable coping reaction to want to control the situation and downplay the significance.

Erm no. You do you.....

Theadoraa · 09/09/2022 04:03

Yanbu. Some famous social media commentators are already making my teeth itch and there’s a lot more to come. If I was a close relative I’d feel upset that I had to share them and their death so publicly.

Travellingwomble · 09/09/2022 05:15

I cried like a baby at a funeral of someone I wasnt that close to, not so much for that person but because I was sad in many other ways and it reminded me of some of my own personal loses. If peoples need is to show their respect to this person who undoubtedly dedicated their life ( as they promised they would) then I think that's lovely. People become more rational after the initial shock and they wont always be that emotional. I'm no royalist by any means but to still be pitching up at 96 is incredible. RIP.

WanderingFruitWonderer · 09/09/2022 05:15

Yeah, it's a weird one. I felt shocked when I heard, and somehow not ready for the news. Almost like, could someone rewind this for me, and change the way this story ends please? I feel a little sad about it.
But, I'm not a royalist, and never took a massive interest in the Queen when she was alive. I admired her hard work etc. I feel sympathy for her loved ones, and pay my respects.
But, got to be honest, I'm fairly philosophical about matters of life and death, especially in relation to the very elderly. I know it's a hugely historical event for many. But, the world has been turning for billions of years, and the Queen was around for 96 of them. In truth, I can't feel personally all that upset. It would seem self-indulgent somehow, as I didn't personally know her. I will feel multiple magnitudes more upset when my own parents pass from this world to the next. Which is correct in my opinion.

derxa · 09/09/2022 06:11

I dislike the sycophancy of it all. Do you now? You cannot police what people feel. Have you seen the tributes from countries all over the world?

Mummadeze · 09/09/2022 06:18

I feel nothing apart from a little sympathy for her family. She was a very old woman, who has had a long and interesting life. There are many more deaths that probably happened yesterday that are far more sad. Will express my opinion here but try to keep it to myself in real life for fear of offending people. But I have no interest at all in any of the ceremony or OTT coverage that will be forthcoming. Agree about just watching Netflix and non PSB channels on TV and getting on with normality as much as I can.

WoodlandMummy · 09/09/2022 06:20

Kashmirsilver · 08/09/2022 21:22

Fgs have some tact.

Show quote history

Fgs don’t quote the original post 🙄

WoodlandMummy · 09/09/2022 06:21

derxa · 09/09/2022 06:11

I dislike the sycophancy of it all. Do you now? You cannot police what people feel. Have you seen the tributes from countries all over the world?

Ha. The irony of you telling the OP she can’t ‘police’ how others feel. I guess that’s lost
on you 🙄

WoodlandMummy · 09/09/2022 06:24

Mummadeze · 09/09/2022 06:18

I feel nothing apart from a little sympathy for her family. She was a very old woman, who has had a long and interesting life. There are many more deaths that probably happened yesterday that are far more sad. Will express my opinion here but try to keep it to myself in real life for fear of offending people. But I have no interest at all in any of the ceremony or OTT coverage that will be forthcoming. Agree about just watching Netflix and non PSB channels on TV and getting on with normality as much as I can.

👏🏼 👏🏼

last night DH and I managed to avoid the hysteria by watching The House of the Dragon and then we listened to the rain. Will be avoiding terrestrial TV and the ‘generally hysterical’ like the plague for the next 10 days.

Bretonbear · 09/09/2022 06:30

derxa · 09/09/2022 06:11

I dislike the sycophancy of it all. Do you now? You cannot police what people feel. Have you seen the tributes from countries all over the world?

Says some policing what those who don't agree with them 😂😂😂😂

derxa · 09/09/2022 06:31

twitter.com/jeremycorbyn/status/1567946329586040833
Jeremy Corbyn shows more respect than you OP

Bretonbear · 09/09/2022 06:33

Bretonbear · 09/09/2022 06:30

Says some policing what those who don't agree with them 😂😂😂😂

Show quote history

Sorry, my reply doesn't make sense, you'd think I'd written THAT poem 😀

What I meant to say was 'says someone policing those who don't agree with them'

YourLipsMyLipsApocalypse · 09/09/2022 06:58

Iamthewombat · 08/09/2022 23:04

Will nobody post this poem I keep hearing about? I am desperate to read it. The only social media I do is LinkedIn and they are all a bit too serious to repost badly spelled poems about dead dukes tapping their wives on the shoulder whilst she talks to Paddington bear etc etc.

LinkedIn is where I saw it!

YourLipsMyLipsApocalypse · 09/09/2022 07:06

MrPlobby · 09/09/2022 00:13

I’m sad, a large part of which is because she lived so long so even though I’m not young she represented something constant in the background of my life while the foreground changed completely. That’s a very “me” centred sadness though. I hope she enjoyed her life.

Charles will be on the throne for a couple of decades at most (assuming he has the same good health as his parents) so the younger generation aren’t going to have the same sense of consistency. If the Monarchy makes it to William, he’ll probably be hitting 60 when he gets to the throne. That sense of stability which formed around the Queen’s physical presence isn’t going to be repeated. I have vague memories of stuff connected to the Silver Jubilee and we had a mug and silver bus still in its box for years which I assume was just in case it became a collector’s item one day. My DM passed away a couple of years ago and we’re still clearing out her house. I have no idea where that bus is.

Yes but over the decades the RF has, and will likely continue to have, faded in relevance, so most people won't give a shit about their being a somewhat revolving figurehead anyway.

I think one of the strangest ways to praise the Queen is for her longevity; as if he someone just didnt die because of her indomitable spirit. A silly notion.

It was good to have a strong and consistent figure in the post-war years (and who had links to Germany) but I don't see us needing that now, or again.