To take DD to A&E?

[Flyinghighinthestars]

Just to show her nothing is wrong? DD is 16 and has autism and adhd. She came back from college today and said one of her ‘friends’ told her to use a vape that they saw on the pavement as they we’re walking home, DD picked it up and used it and then told me when she got home. Apparently it had no vape left in it so didn’t work properly but DD tried it around 5-6 times as her friends we’re telling her to. Anyway now she’s home she’s overthinking (she does this because of her autism) and really worrying saying ‘what if it had dirt or soil on/in it from being on the floor and I accidentally breathed it in’ ‘what it vaping it (the battery was still working apparently) with nothing in has done me harm’ and so on. She’s saying her “voice sounds different” (it sounds the same to me) and saying her throat feels like it’s burning and her chest feels “weird” (DD can’t explain why it feels weird) and “hurts a little”. Me and DH have reassured her nothing is wrong but she’s overthinking still and having a full on autistic meltdown right now. Should I just take her to A&E and get her checked out just to show her she is fine? DD has never used a vape before this incident

@Flyinghighinthestars
I have two ASD kids too, OMG the STRESS with DD, always something, Rabies was one, they get so terrified & anxious & it takes ages (can be days / weeks in her case) to calm down again.. I would personally tell a huge whopper that you've got a tablet from a friend that's rare & will kill any germs / whatever she's worried about, and give her any tiny tablet that you've got hanging around..

I have not RTFT but wanted to say your poor dd and poor you!

Of course you must not go to A&E but you can call 111, or let you dd call 111 if she is capable. You can also enter your symptoms on 111 online and depending on what your answers to the 111 phone/online questions are your dd will get a recommendation for next step.

You could also take her to the pharmacist.

and

My DD 15 is also autistic and adhd. When we go into a meltdown it just keeps spiralling. I think the mind goes overactive and her thoughts wander and it all just keeps escalating. Do you have any Promethazine in the house. It’s what we have been told to use by our psychiatrist to help take them edge off of these anxiety/meltdowns so they are then in a place where you can effectively distract and get them out of the meltdown gently. It’s available over the counter at boots and is basically a light sedation and will also help her relax enough to sleep tonight. It’s non addictive and safe.

I definitely would avoid the A&E as I know in our case it would make things 100x worse with her thinking she’ll catch some disease from someone in the waiting room and you then move on from the vape crisis to something else.

Sore chest and throat are always clear signs of DD's anxiety and now I can talk her down more quickly because she knows they are symptoms.

I have to repeatedly tell my DD but when I sound confident she will eventually take it in. I tell her I would never not take her to the hospital if I thought there was something badly wrong and we can talk to a doctor if she wants to make her relax.

No.

I think maybe after a couple of days and after she is settled down, mention she could catch diseases putting something in her mouth that was laying on a road and had been in other peoples mouths.

Sometimes mine get to a point where they're exhausted, they want the meltdown to end, but there's just no way their brain can let go of the thing they're obsessing about. They need a 'way out'. If it wasn't so difficult to get a GP appointment I would say maybe you could promise to take her tomorrow. Perhaps that might calm her enough that she lets herself sleep and maybe tomorrow things might not seem so bad. If that's not an option, I'd say you need to show her something: maybe select parts of this thread, where people are adamant she won't have done any harm.

If I do this she will likely go into another meltdown, even if I wait a few days

People vape all the time with working vapes, why would an empty one cause problems?

Sorry I should have added that using 111 or speaking to a pharmacist are reasonable actions if she is worried about her health.

I don't know the extend of your dd's autism / ADHD but if she is 'high functioning' this will teach her how to look after herself is she health worries and use the appropriate service.

Giving her a 'super bug killing pill' like a pp suggested could backfire.

Other than that, would CBT help with your dd's anxiety in the longer term?

@Flyinghighinthestars I’m sorry this is happening and I think there is lots of useful advice in this thread - I will offer you a hand hold and hugs.

If I do this she will likely go into another meltdown, even if I wait a few days

What makes you think this if she hasn't had a meltdown for years prior to today?

You must not be close to someone with autism because this is awful advice despite being well intentioned. I know you are trying to help but that's not how it works. Once you say something like that she will be overly worried about any sort of germs. My DD used to scrub her hands raw worrying about something being dirty.

Because she would worry about a similar thing she is worrying about right now, being ‘unwell/poorly’, I don’t want to risk going through all this again

Nothing to suggest@Flyinghighinthestars about stopping the meltdown, despite having a teen with ASD. I hope your DD wears herself out soon or you can get through to her. It might also be to do with her starting college and everything being overwhelming etc etc.

I'd sound a word of caution about accessing the counsellor at college though. While he/she might be a specialist with ASD teens, the one my DC saw at school was utterly inappropriate for someone with autism. Fortunately, that was so obvious that DC voluntarily gave up after one session but you might get stuck with your DD getting advice which is thoroughly confused or downright harmful. I agree with PPs about trying to talk to her about peer pressure though.

111 will send an ambulance if you mention chest pain and the ambulance will 100% take her to A&E no matter what.

@Flyinghighinthestars hmm there are lots of these disposable vapes at the moment. Most of them light up in some way whether that be on the side or the bottom but there may be some that don't light up at all. If she did inhale anything whether that be from one that lights up or one that doesn't - and she's sure it worked - it will cause her no harm if it was a vape. They feel harsh on the throat but definitely no harm to her health in regards what she said she has done.
I know a lot of people are saying not to take her to A&E - I agree with this - but if you are unsure and she is unsure too you could call 111 for advice/reassurance. Not to add fuel to the flame but inhaling anything found on a pavement I too would be a little unsure of even if it posed as a disposable vape I guess can never be sure, so I understand her distress that she is worrying as I guess it may be her way of realising it was a bit silly to do/peer pressure from friends? How's she doing now? X

Op I'm a nurse, sitting beside a doctor (dh) and we have just poured a large glass of wine after our autistic daughter finally fell into bed after an epic meltdown. I know your pain. My daughter will never listen to us as 1st I'm 'just a nurse' and 2nd my husband is a surgeon so she will only listen to him if it's to do with heart surgery (she did have 2 holes in her heart so does get worried about it)

My brother in law is a GP though and the amount of times we have to get him up here to reassure her is ridiculous. If its any consolation (and we would never give out medical advice online) both me and dh would bet 99.99% the vape did no harm at all. Probably just a bit of that burnt feeling and other symptoms are anxiety related. Hope it ends soon, I'll drink my wine with thoughts of you.

Sounds like she was calming down a bit but DH started her again. For now, just stop everything. Let her be as long as she's safe, say once "I know you are scared and I'm here for you when you need me" then move away and sit down (read a book,pretend you're doing something else or actually get on with a chore etc) . No talking,no touching , nothing. It will be hard , and it will take a while but you should see signs of it diminishing in intensity. Don't react. Keep doing what you are doing until she is calmer or seeks you out. Keep calm, quiet reassurance voice, slow movements. Offer hugs or whatever she finds reassuring. Slowly, patiently (as hard as it is).

I wonder if the meltdown has partly been triggered by starting college. New places, people, routines - lots of change which can be hard for some autistic people. This might be why she's having a meltdown for the first time in ages and the vape thing is just the "gateway" for bigger feelings / her stress bucket was already full when this happened.

I find focusing on staying regulated, calm and quiet myself is the best thing I can do in these instances. Put ear plugs in and don't feel like you need to say much if anything. If things start to calm, you could try offering a snack or hug or whatever you think she'd like.

Your DH was really unhelpful!

Probably a stupid idea but could you tell her a white lie and say you have spoken to a dr and the advice is that it doesnt cause any harm but a glass of iced water can calm the symptoms?

If your dh is out the house could you change his name in your phone to 111 and then have a one sided conversation while on the phone to him?
They usually start by asking if you're calling about yourself or someone else. And then ask contact details and then if the person is breathing and awake if I remember correctly. 💐

OP, no experience of dealing with an autistic meltdown, but how about finding some sore throat medication or cough mixture and a vitamin tablet and approaching her with them — not close enough to be hit — and announcing that you've consulted experts on the internet (ahem) and this is how you treat a person who has sucked on a dry vape. Medicine first, followed by the pill swallowed with a drink.

Tell her she needs to be calm and sitting up properly on a chair before the medication can be administered, and she will need to have a little something to eat to help the medicine work properly in her stomach. If she's been able to stop and drink something, perhaps she's reached a stage where she can hear you.

Good luck.

If I'd lived close I'd come around with my pulse/oximeter, blood pressure cuff and digital thermometer to reassure her she wasn't dying. I'd give her some sort of pill as well. Maybe a tic tac.

Don't feed into the overthinking. I have a strong family history of OCD and germ phobia. Come back to the fact that her worry is a symptom of her overthinking. It's not a reaction to anything harmful in the vape - don't even entertain it. Help her calm down and change her perspective - she is struggling with a psychological symptom, not a medical one.