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AIBU?

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Original poster

To take DD to A&E?

305 replies

Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:07

Just to show her nothing is wrong? DD is 16 and has autism and adhd. She came back from college today and said one of her ‘friends’ told her to use a vape that they saw on the pavement as they we’re walking home, DD picked it up and used it and then told me when she got home. Apparently it had no vape left in it so didn’t work properly but DD tried it around 5-6 times as her friends we’re telling her to. Anyway now she’s home she’s overthinking (she does this because of her autism) and really worrying saying ‘what if it had dirt or soil on/in it from being on the floor and I accidentally breathed it in’ ‘what it vaping it (the battery was still working apparently) with nothing in has done me harm’ and so on. She’s saying her “voice sounds different” (it sounds the same to me) and saying her throat feels like it’s burning and her chest feels “weird” (DD can’t explain why it feels weird) and “hurts a little”. Me and DH have reassured her nothing is wrong but she’s overthinking still and having a full on autistic meltdown right now. Should I just take her to A&E and get her checked out just to show her she is fine? DD has never used a vape before this incident

OP posts:
porkmarkets · 07/09/2022 18:20

Sorry, no. The pair of you will likely get short shrift from the A&E staff which is unlikely to help her mood.

Lulumo · 07/09/2022 18:20

I would be more worried that she was so easily egged on by a “friend”. I have an autistic teen and their gullibility concerns me a lot.

Autistic people/people with autism often can’t judge how much something hurts and they do feel pain more (lots of science to back that statement).

do not go to a&e worse place to go if you are autistic - noise, chaos, hours waiting. Talk though logically that she has not harmed herself.

is there a counsellor at college?

JugglingJanuary · 07/09/2022 18:21

Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:16

She didn’t actually vape it as there was no stuff left in it but the battery still worked when she tried to used it apparently

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Yeah, that's what I meant but phrased badly, a few puffs of an empty vape!!

it's not going to do her even a tiny bit of harm.

TRY to use it as a teaching moment, not to do fucking stupid things because others say so!!

but that's hard enough with NT teens, let alone those with Autism!

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:21

Lulumo · 07/09/2022 18:20

I would be more worried that she was so easily egged on by a “friend”. I have an autistic teen and their gullibility concerns me a lot.

Autistic people/people with autism often can’t judge how much something hurts and they do feel pain more (lots of science to back that statement).

do not go to a&e worse place to go if you are autistic - noise, chaos, hours waiting. Talk though logically that she has not harmed herself.

is there a counsellor at college?

I know I will be working on that part too as I know she’s too gullible, I’ve tried for years to help her with this though x

OP posts:
Sarahconnor1 · 07/09/2022 18:22

Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:15

Oh god, 9 hours?!

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Yes it was grim. I suspect some people didn't need to be there but it was packed, hot and stuffy.

i would need to be on deaths door before I went anywhere near A&E at the moment

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:22

Lulumo · 07/09/2022 18:20

I would be more worried that she was so easily egged on by a “friend”. I have an autistic teen and their gullibility concerns me a lot.

Autistic people/people with autism often can’t judge how much something hurts and they do feel pain more (lots of science to back that statement).

do not go to a&e worse place to go if you are autistic - noise, chaos, hours waiting. Talk though logically that she has not harmed herself.

is there a counsellor at college?

And sorry yes college has a counsellor I think but will double check

OP posts:
billysmallnuts · 07/09/2022 18:22

My dad was taken to a&e with a head injury/concussion last week and was waiting 14hrs to be seen.

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:23

Sarahconnor1 · 07/09/2022 18:22

Yes it was grim. I suspect some people didn't need to be there but it was packed, hot and stuffy.

i would need to be on deaths door before I went anywhere near A&E at the moment

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I’m so sorry you went through that, I’m definitely not up for that after dealing with hours and hours of DD having a meltdown

OP posts:
Wingingit2047 · 07/09/2022 18:23

When you take a draw of a vape that has no liquid, the coil burns dry and it isn't a nice sensation but it won't have done her any harm. As pp have said, A&E isn't for people who are well and need reassurance. I really needed them on Sunday and it was a 10 hour wait.

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:23

billysmallnuts · 07/09/2022 18:22

My dad was taken to a&e with a head injury/concussion last week and was waiting 14hrs to be seen.

I am so sorry it took such a long time for him to be seen x

OP posts:
Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:24

Wingingit2047 · 07/09/2022 18:23

When you take a draw of a vape that has no liquid, the coil burns dry and it isn't a nice sensation but it won't have done her any harm. As pp have said, A&E isn't for people who are well and need reassurance. I really needed them on Sunday and it was a 10 hour wait.

Good to hear it won’t have done her any harm though. Trying to talk to her but she’s still having a meltdown

OP posts:
Tiredmum100 · 07/09/2022 18:24

Bemoredog · 07/09/2022 18:11

No, because you don't want her to then believe she needs to go to A&E for reassurance when not needed.

That's what I was going to say. She will learn to go to a&e in the future for every little thing. I understand you don't know what to do, but what a waste of the nurses and doctors time if you do take her. Does she take anything for her anxiety? I would have a chat to her about not doing silly things her friends tell her to do.

LegoFiends · 07/09/2022 18:25

Call 111 with her listening as they go through the questions? It’s quite reassuring

Sunnyqueen · 07/09/2022 18:25

The only thing that can happen from vaping on dry vape is you get what feels like a very very slight burnt mouth/throat feeling but it literally lasts a few minutes and then it's gone. I've done it accidentally a few times so know from experience lol.
Don't take her to a and e, maybe explain that to her and give her an ibuprofen just to placebo her a bit to calm down.

Sarahconnor1 · 07/09/2022 18:26

Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:23

I’m so sorry you went through that, I’m definitely not up for that after dealing with hours and hours of DD having a meltdown

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I was just collecting someone thankfully. Just wanted to get across how awful a&e is at the moment. The last place anyone wants to be, probably worse still if you have autism.

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:26

LegoFiends · 07/09/2022 18:25

Call 111 with her listening as they go through the questions? It’s quite reassuring

Yeah I might have to try this, I know it’s using up resources but I’m at my wits end, I can’t go on with her having this meltdown tonight

I’ll only do this if I absolutely have too, will try to calm her again a few times first

OP posts:
LIZS · 07/09/2022 18:26

More likely anxiety. Try to calm her down and distract her. Can you do some breathing exercises with her?

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:28

Sunnyqueen · 07/09/2022 18:25

The only thing that can happen from vaping on dry vape is you get what feels like a very very slight burnt mouth/throat feeling but it literally lasts a few minutes and then it's gone. I've done it accidentally a few times so know from experience lol.
Don't take her to a and e, maybe explain that to her and give her an ibuprofen just to placebo her a bit to calm down.

She said she vaped on it 6 times though? And no idea how long it had been on the pavement. She’s claiming she’s still got that burnt feeling. She’s currently on the floor and shouting “it hurts here” and pointing to her chest

OP posts:
JugglingJanuary · 07/09/2022 18:28

Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:17

I would absolutely distract or tell her to go to her room or have a bath but she’s currently lay on the floor screaming and crying and hitting out and having a full on meltdown, she hasn’t had an autism meltdown this bad since she was younger

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Always fun!!

Had a 30 year old, 6ft, 17'ish stone boy/man have one this week because he wasn't allowed to take his Dads Air Riffle in to town (not my DS. not my DH. It's in a locked cabinet & no ammo).

it's hard 💐. Ended up going into the other room & telling him to come to me when he was ready & we'd build his new Lego set & have a snack & hot chocolate.

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:28

LIZS · 07/09/2022 18:26

More likely anxiety. Try to calm her down and distract her. Can you do some breathing exercises with her?

If I go near her while she’s on the floor having a meltdown she hits out otherwise I would do some breathing exercises to help her

OP posts:
SunshineClouds1 · 07/09/2022 18:28

I vape, if it's a reusable one it may have burnt she may have felt the coil burn, if it's a disposable one nothing would happen.

If she's sucked pretty hard 6 times sometimes the mouth piece can get hot.

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:29

SunshineClouds1 · 07/09/2022 18:28

I vape, if it's a reusable one it may have burnt she may have felt the coil burn, if it's a disposable one nothing would happen.

If she's sucked pretty hard 6 times sometimes the mouth piece can get hot.

But it won’t have done her any harm right? It was a disposable one

OP posts:
Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:30

I’m going to be up all night with her having a meltdown at this rate, she’s only just started college this week and has to be up early as she’s in first thing tomorrow morning

OP posts:
ewchoc · 07/09/2022 18:31

If it was me (I have an autistic son) I would phone 111 on speaker and get her to go through it with me

Original poster
Flyinghighinthestars · 07/09/2022 18:31

SunshineClouds1 · 07/09/2022 18:28

I vape, if it's a reusable one it may have burnt she may have felt the coil burn, if it's a disposable one nothing would happen.

If she's sucked pretty hard 6 times sometimes the mouth piece can get hot.

She also said the battery in it was still working but the vape was empty

OP posts:
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